Bless Your Little Heart

TWENTY

As she scuffled to her room I couldn't help but feel guilt wash over me. Knowing how I just used her for my own pleasure. The thing is Im not the kind of man who feels guilty, I feel no regret or remorse for any of my actions.

But right now, I felt shitty.

She was simply curious Im sure, but my dark side saw that as a display of dominance. The way she just simply thought she could touch me and not have consequences.

That's just how I rolled, I always had. But I also had never allowed the women to sleep near me, let alone be outside of their room.

I was having a lot of firsts with her.

Sitting alone as only my breathless pants fill the air, I lose myself in my thoughts.

Why did I take her?

I never intended for this to be her fate, yet here she is. Being used and taught how to be a perfect sex slave basically.

I didn't want that for her. I took her for me, but I had commands I wouldn't dare break. But something about her drew me to her, maybe it was the way he nose scrunched when she laughed, or how her dark freckles had still stayed so apparent despite being hidden away from the Sun.

I was mesmerized by her.

And I hated it.

I simply wanted her for my own sick pleasure, but her small touches, the way her frail little voice escapes her plump cherry lips. It awakened something inside me, something I didn't understand.

Something I was afraid of, I had always hidden my emotions and done it well. But with her I felt like dropping my hard demeanor and giving all in to her beauty.

But I couldn't.

She wasn't mine, as she never was. I stole her from her own life then brought her into a hell she never imagined. Even now she wasn't mine, she was the cartels.

They had all of her information, her parents, per pictures, literally anything and everything they needed. They had it.

I slowly lift from the couch, my legs wobbly from the amazing climax she gave me.

God the way she sucked it was phenomenal, the way her small little mouth took every inch of my cock.

The moment was on replay in my head, allowing the dirty thoughts to flow freely thought out my brain.

Cheerily I walk to my room before closing the door, walking to the nightstand I look down upon the vast amount of pills that laid before me.

I was almost out of my antipsychotics, which wasn't a good thing. Phillip said he was bringing more when he comes for a supply drop today but I didn't trust his word. He constantly forgot major items necessary to surviving where I am.

He was a liability and everyone knew that, butt sadly he was family. Taken in as a child like me, raised under the arms of the cartel, teaching us everything we know. Obviously I'm a higher rank than he ever dreams of being, due to his complete lack of trust in us and his stupidity.

But like I said, he was family.

I throw the last of my medicine into my mouth, swallowing the dry mass as I feel it fight against my throat. Finally falling down but not before almost choking me.

I fucking hated these.

They were the size of a damn kidney bean and tasted like pure ass. Like chemicals burning your tongue the second it touched it.

But I had taken these since I was a child, helping keep my anger and demons at bay.

They still lingered deep inside, waiting for the moment they can finally emerge again. To cause more pain and havoc to anyone who crossed their path.

I prayed it wouldn't be Madelyn, I could never forgive myself. Hurting someone as innocent a fragile as her. Slapping her that one day didn't affect me but now, I would rather die.

I make my way to the bathroom before stripping the dirty clothes from my body, turning the dial to warm on the shower. Stepping inside I allow the water to flow down my chest and back, highlighting every crevice in my body.

The warmth was refreshing, like I was waking up yet again after an amazing night sleep.

I walked out dressed simple, jeans and a long sleeve button down, nothing too fancy. Madelyn stood over the stove scraping at something in the pan. The leggings she wore accentuated every curve and sip of her body. Her gorgeous ass filling every inch of fabric as it pushed harshly against the seams.

"Smells good in here." I remark before walking behind her, standing to the right of her as I lean against the counter.

She tosses some vegetables into rice before mixing it in the pan. Adding a mixture of sauces and spices.

"Chicken fried rice." She smiled down at her creation, mixing every bit of goodness together as the delicious scents filled my nose.

Her small hand gripped the spatula as she moved the dish around. Dropping the cooked chicken pieces in shortly after, happily stirring it all together.

"Like Martha Stewart or something." I chuckle before stealing a piece of chicken and popping it into my mouth. The flavors bursting as they cost every taste bud in my mouth, a 'mmm' sound emitting from me.

"He should be here soon. Make sure you keep it warm until then." I stare onto her as her gaze meets mine, an inviting smile laid on her lips.

"Yes sir." She smiled as she brought her attention back to the food. Her attitude surprised me after the way she walked off, she seemed sad at first. But maybe she's cheered up, thankfully. I didn't want to deal with her moping around all depressed.

I walk to the small table adjacent to the kitchen, seeing the plates and silverware already set out. I couldn't help but smile, knowing she'd actually been listening to all I had been saying to her.

It always felt rewarding, even though I was teaching them to be slaves to men. Knowing she was doing it for me felt good, I enjoyed it.

I almost didn't want her to go. It's only a month into her stay and I couldn't imagine what it would be like without her here. I didn't even want to think about it awful thought.

But that was the sad truth,

She wasn't, and never would be truly mine.

-

Wholesome moments only here in this chapter, but don't worry. It'll get crazy again soon enough :)))

xoxo