Behind The Mask is Love For You

Catching Up With Skylar (and time skip)

Skylar's Perspective-

As the months went by, so did Bdubs and Etho's relationship.

It was magical watching them flirt with each other.

You can even catch the two looking at each other with love shining off of their faces.

Ever since I was little, I always wanted to fall in love.

I wanted to be with someone so badly.

I wanted...I wanted love.

My parents weren't the best when I was growing up because they always told me that I had to marry a girl.

I eventually came out to them during the 8th grade, and they then started to neglect me.

They told me that the reason why they were doing that was because I was a trans girl.

They hated me just as much as I hated them.

And I never really understood it either.

You're supposed to love and care for your child, not neglect them and send them off to a Christian camp to try and make me straight.

I hated that camp.

My mother had cut my long hair down to a very short length and told me that I have to be a guy.

And then I was sent off.

I thought I could make friends, but I couldn't.

It was mostly because I couldn't fit in though.

It was about praying to God and all that shit.

But the thing that bothered me the most,

Was when they brought up lgbtq people.

I was outraged.

The woman talked about how lgbtq people will go to hell and you have to like the other gender.

She then made us all repeat the same sentence.

What was the sentence, you ask?

It was,

'If I am gay, I will go to hell. I have to like the opposite gender.'

That was the final straw.

I ended up lashing out and got sent home from the camp.

-

And now I'm here.

A part of me is jealous whenever I see Etho and Bdubs together.

They seem so comfortable and happy.

And that's what I want.

My life's not always happy.

Especially since I'm trans and pan.

But then I met Bdubs.

And he became my first friend.

Well, I had a couple of friends in elementary school, but they diched me when they heard I was trans.

And I made a friend in middle school, but he ended up moving.

But now I'm friends with Bdubs and so many other people.

It's amazing.

And then I met Pammy.

She's super sweet, and I hope that one day I can muster up the courage to ask her out.

But that's a long ways away.

-

"Skylar?"

"Hm?"

I looked up and saw Bdubs.

"You alright? You were just staring off into space.

"O-oh yeah, I'm alright."

"How about we do something else? I'm tired of doing homework and I still need to get Etho a Valentine's Day present for tomorrow." Bdubs said, stuffing his books in his backpack and slinging it over his shoulder.

I nodded and packed up my stuff before following him outside.

And a part of me knew, that Valentine's Day was going to be the worst day of the year for me.

Especially since everyone has their high school sweethearts.

I looked up at Bdubs, who seemed so happy.

I wish I could be like that. In a healthy relationship.

I sighed and looked down at my feet.

But I guess I'm just not meant to be in one.