The Ereri Project!

Bug

"AHH!"

"DADDY! HELP!"

Levi races downstairs, still only wearing a towel after his shower. "What?" he asks in a panic.

Both his husband and daughter are standing on the couch and giving panicked stares to something on the ground.

A Big. Black. Cockroach.

Levi jumps up on the recliner. "What the fuck?" he says, staring at the bug as well.

"Kill it!" Petra says.

Levi shakes his head. "That this is huge, it'll stain the carpet."

"So clean it," Eren says.

Levi shakes his head again. "How did it even get in here?" Petra and Eren look at each other, neither of them know. "Great," Levi says. "Don't know why it's here and no one's willing to get rid of it."

"Please Levi?"

"No."

"Why not, Dad?"

"No."

Eren and Petra stare at Levi. "Are you afraid of bugs?" Eren asks.

Levi just stares at the roach and doesn't respond.

Petra shakes her head. "I know we of this household are capable of moving against stereotypes but why couldn't one of the men in this house not be afraid to squash a big?"

"Because a certain princess won't squash one either," Eren replies.

"Hey! I've squashed many bugs before!"

"But you're not squishing this one so that doesn't help me!"

Levi frowns. "Will you two stop bickering so we can make a plan?"

"Like what?" Eren frowns. "Ask it nicely to leave?"

"Don't be an ass," Levi replies. "I was going to say, one of us should run to the kitchen for a cup to trap it with."

"Then what?" Petra asks.

Eren bites the inside of his cheek. "We could find something to slide under it to carry it outside."

"Cardboard or something," Levi adds.

"Okay," Petra says. "But which one of us is going to the kitchen?"

They all look at each other. "Goddamnit," Eren mutters.

Levi looks back down. "Oh fuck, where'd it go?"

Eren and Petra look down as well, panic suddenly swelling the room. "Uh oh," Eren mutters.

Levi feels a sudden tickle on his leg. He almost wants to cry when he looks down.

Yes, the cockroach is crawling up his shin.

Adrenaline forcing his hand, he swings his fist, crushing the nasty thing on his leg. He gags at the sight of bug guts on his skin. Eren and Petra both rush over to hug him.

"I'm so sorry babe," Eren says.

"I love you, Daddy," Petra adds.

Levi shrugs both of them off angrily as he storms off to take another shower.