Stay - Dallas Winston

46

"Damn it! I just can't stand this anymore! Everyone's fighting, and I'm like the middle man on tug of war!" Soda cried out. 

I hugged him tightly, as we both cried. 

Ponyboy, and Darry soon were at our sides. 

"We won't fight no more." Darry spoke. 

All four of us were crying now. 

"And all this stuff with Sandy doesn't help." Soda wiped his tears away. 

"What happened with Sandy?" I asked him. 

Sodas face sank a bit.

"She's pregnant.  She left and went to go live with her grandmother.  I told her I would help her raise it.  She just... left." Soda cried. 

"Well you'll get to see it, won't you?" Ponyboy asked. 

"It ain't my baby." Soda looked up at the night sky, trying to keep himself from crying even more. 

Sandy cheated on Soda?

That fucking bitch. 

Wait....

When was the last time I had my period?

I don't even remember the last time I had it. 

It had to be before Johnny killed that soc. 

I think I had it a month before then. 

Oh, no.

I began crying hysterically, hyperventilating. 

"I didn't mean to upset you or anything." Soda reassured me.  

"Noo! God no!" I screamed out, pulling my knees up to my chest.  

"Whats wrong?" Darry asked me in a calm voice. 

With his calm demeanor right now, I hopped what I was about to say wouldn't make him yell. 

I took a few deep breaths, to calm myself down. 

"I don't think I've had my period for a month or two.  I'm so scared, Darry." I began to shake. 

"I'll take you to the clinic tomorrow.  We will figure this out, and get through this together." Darry said, standing up, and helping me too my feet. 

I wiped my tears away with my hands, and Darry have me a big hug.  

"No more smoking and no more drinking, until we find out what's going on." Darry spoke seriously to me.  

"Got it." I said. 

Ponyboy and Soda stood up as well. 

The four of us put our arms around each other, and made our way back to the curtis house.  

_______________________________________

Eight months later I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy, Tucker Cade Winston. 

I was living at the Curtis house full time since that night Johnny and Dallas died. 

I finished high-school and got my diploma. 

It was hard being a single mother and trying to do school, but I gutted it out like I always did.  

I did it. 

Purely on the fact that I told Dallas I would, and I didn't want to let him down.  

Every day it got a little bit easier.  

The gang helped a lot, and despite their tough faces they put on, they were really good with the baby. 

Even Steve and I started to get along.  

I think we all realized that we couldn't take each other's presence for granted. 

"You know, Tucker looks just like Dallas." Ponyboy said one day, as we sat in the living room.  

I looked over at Tucker, who sat on Twobits lap on the floor, as they both watched Mickey Mouse. 

"Yeah, I love it... but I hate it.  I just wish he was still here you know, Johnny too. Every time I see Tucker, I see Dallas.  It makes me happy, but so sad at the same time." I gave Ponyboy a weak smile. 

"He looks like Dallas, but he's kind like you.... well, except that time he bit me." Ponyboy chuckled. 

It made me giggle a little bit too. 

"Ponyboy, when you wrote that paper, did it help?" I asked him.  

Ponyboy thought for a second, and smiled. 

"Yeah, it did.  I wish you would have let me add you into it, but that's alright.  Why, you want to write something?" Ponyboy asked. 

"Yeah, it's been about a year since they died.  I think it would help me.  I don't think I can write the long thing you wrote though." I picked at my fingertips. 

"Something is better than nothing. Let me get you a paper and a pencil." Ponyboy smiled.

He walked into his room, and returned with a notebook and pencil. 

"Thanks, Ponyboy." I smiled, and I began to write. 

Ever since you died, I've been angry at the world.

They said it inhabits the physical form.

They said it was the conditions, and my subconscious level to feel guilt. 

But, I don't think that's it.

I believe it's based on experience. 

I watched your life leave your body as it hit the ground. 

I remember the way your body rolled and twitched, before you took your last breath. 

I remember the steam that rose off of your body, before they picked you up off the concrete. 

But,

I also remember the way you laughed and smiled with your eyes.

I also remember how you couldn't stay mad at me for very long. 

I remember how happy I was when I was around you. 

They let me keep his jacket, they knew I would miss him the most. 

I guess they were right. 

So now,

I’m sitting here

With a leather jacket that has burnt holes and a broken zipper, 
With a mile long list of things I wish I would have said. 

I would give anything and everything just for one more minute with you, just to hear your voice again. 

I would have done anything to make you stay.