Hollow

Chapter 28

Every weekend it was something new to look forward to. For the past two months I would just count down until the weekend hits, sometimes I'd see him before that.

Every Time he'd leave it has been the same routine with me. Becoming devenstated, but that changed after awhile, because I knew I was going to see him soon

Sometimes we would just sit and talk about things we like doing, or about the people we care about...well the people I care about. He claimed that he just lived alone. We would talk about how we grew from the beginning and what we thought each other would be like. I basically knew everything about him, and he knew everything about me.

Slowly but surely, I honestly didn't only forget about Ma'am, but I started to really despise her, despise her for being the main problem why my life has always been so depressing. I have been sheltered, lonely, and felt abandoned and insecure for my whole life because of her selfish desire to raise a kid again or whatever. I missed out on Lonnie. Everytime I would ask about him, I would get no answer, and the only answer I got was pretty much a lie.

She killed herself and left me behind, didn't even tell me anything before she died. It makes me upset on how much I was attached to her after all this time, I worshiped her, looked at her as a perfect person.. My perfect person. Now it's over, and honestly. I'm happy about it. It's not like I don't appreciate everything she's done for me, but I don't absolutely love her like I used to anymore. After what she did, it came to my mind that I don't think I could ever forgive her. It's like she didn't seem to notice how I was being affected by her actions. It made me very upset.

I started to invite Miss Toledo and Timmy with us sometimes, I want them to know that I still really care about both of them. I want to ensure that I am not going to forget about them now that I met Lonnie. I actually took what Miss Toledo said into perspective, so empathizing with them really helped me understand where she was coming from.

Everytime I would see Lonnie, he wouldn't only get me McDonalds, there was always another gift behind it. I can't tell you all of them, but the best gift I got was an iphone. It was that rectangle shaped thing Harley from the trampoline park had.

I would be on it all day, now I'm an expert at using it. I use instagram and tiktok. I would post on it now and then. I would watch youtube videos, I usually liked to watch gaming videos. I would watch netflix, or hulu. I would even take selfies a lot of the day, I started to care about how I looked even more now, now that I see Instagram models and tiktokers looking so good looking. Lonnie also got Timmy an ipad, which is basically like an iphone but a bigger screen and you can't call on a regular basis. Only facetime. Timmy was also obsessed.

Everytime I would come back from hanging out with Lonnie, I would always see Miss Toledo on the phone, or in her room sorting things out. She looked anxious all the time after that phone call. She wouldn't tell anyone about it, though. Miss Toledo never talked much about her problems, but you could always tell when she was going through something, it was written all over her face, kind of like me. People claim that I have a face where you just "know" I'm upset. I would try asking Miss Toledo, but she would just claim that she was fine.

It's now August, and summer is almost over, I am expected to start school in two weeks, I was petrified, the feeling about going to school just made me nervous. I hated that swollen feeling it made my stomach.

Anyways, right now me and Lonnie were at the movies. We both hate the movie so far, mostly because it was about animals. We both are not really a fan of animals.

" It's kind of weird," I said, stuffing my mouth with popcorn.

"What is?"

"Ma'am just killing herself out of nowhere... it really made me confused before. But now, I feel like I know why."

Lonnie turned to the movie, I thought he would just ignore me. "Well, tell me why."

"I just feel like she was done with hiding, and maybe she was miserable just keeping me a secret from the public. Maybe she didn't like the way she was living anymore... maybe she was diagnosed with something..." I said.

Lonnie laughed.

"It's not funny" I said.

"She did that because she found out that the police found her, and she knew that she would be going away for a long time." he said.

I felt stupid after that, the way he said it made me feel stupid, and it was obvious.

I slowly nodded, and continued to watch the movie.

"Hey.." He said hesitantly. "Uh.. have you ever thought about living with me, or has it ever came to mind?"

"No.. not until now." I answered. "Why?"

"Eh.. just wondering. Can you picture yourself living with me?" He asked.

I looked down, "Yeah." I said. "Just.. don't tell Miss Toledo or Timmy.. I don't want to hurt their feelings."

He nodded, as we continued to watch the movie.