ALL THE GOOD THINGS HAPPEN TO ME

CHAPTER 14

I AM IN LOVE, I'VE NEVER BEEN IN LOVE BEFORE
I wanted to kiss her so bad, she is beautiful. Evelyn! I wonder how she feels when she's called by Olivia. I can't believe she kissed me. I was just joking but she kissed me. Goddamn, it's so good to think about her.
I just want to be with her so bad not even kidding. It's just her and her. I never felt this way for anyone. I wonder if she ever felt something.
I left her a note, I was waiting for in the soccer field.
I saw someone coming but it was not her.
It was Stacy. What does she want?
"Hey." Stacy said.
"What's up?"
"I just know you are annoyed by me, I just wanted to make Lucas jealous but then I heard you and Evelyn were together. I am sorry. I ju--"
She was crying badly over a guy who didn't care at all. I felt bad. I patted her arm and we kinda hugged. I thought it'll make her feel better.
Maybe she's hurt badly. I should maybe talk to Evelyn about it.

I was waiting for almost 30 mins for Evelyn. She's not here yet. Where is this girl? I tried to call her. She didn't pick any.
I went outside the field. I looked for her but she was not there.

I saw Noah, he was with Mia.
She was quite worried so I went to them and asked them.
"Have you guys seen Evelyn?" I asked them.
"You don't know?" Noah said.
"What is it guys?"
"She said you guys ended the whole dating thing." Mia said.
"What-"
"Really why'd she?"
"She said you are with Stacy now."
"Oh no, she misunderstood us."
"What is it?" Noah asked

I explained them the whole thing.
We should talk to Evelyn.
We tried to call her, she wasn't attending my call. Mia also tried to call her. We were worried and I went to her house. No one responded. I was quite worried. Where is she?
I kept trying her but the phone was off.
I was way worried that I couldn't even sleep.
I went for a walk to calm myself down. When I came back, I probably made some noise. My mom woke up and it was 12. She asked where I went and if I was okay. I can't really hold it back from my mom so I told her everything. She was quite worried and asked me to confess everything I felt for Evelyn.
She gave me a lot of courage. I prepared myself on how to be good enough for Evelyn. She is maybe going to reject me. But I knew I was hopelessly in love. I was since I saw her.
Maybe I was not enough for her but I will be good enough for her. No matter what. I will not lose my hope.

THERE'S NO HOPE NOW. I SAW HER TODAY WITH LUCAS AT SCHOOL. THEY WERE KISSING. MAYBE SHE LIKES HIM. I SHOULD ASK HER. SHE HATES HIM.
WHAT IS UP WITH THEM. THEY NEVER MENTIONED LIKING EACH OTHER.
I WENT TO CLASS AND GAVE HER A CHIT.
SHE REALLY SAID,
SHE LIKES LUCAS AND I SHOULD FORGET EVERYTHING ABOUT THAT KISS. IT DIDN'T MEAN ANYTHING TO HER.
THERE WAS NOTHING BETWEEN US.
I love her but I don't wanna do anything 'cause she said she loves him. They are together now, what can I do now?

I can't help myself, how I can? She loves him and I hate this but I can't, I really can't.

She literally asked me to give my seat to Lucas. She looked at me and I was dead at that moment. I wanted to talk to her. She was standing alone so this was perfect timing.
I went to her and talked to her about How was she? She said she was okay. Then she literally screamed at me. I had this breakdown of emotions. I was mad at her. God I can't-
She pushed me away and ran away. I fuckin scared her.
I am so bad why I couldn't tell her I love her so bad. Maybe she doesn't, she loves Lucas.
What is wrong with everyone?
Lucas loves Evelyn and Evelyn loves Lucas. Stacy and I are heartbroken.

FUCK, FUCK, FUCK.
SHE IS ALL OVER ME. I CAN'T HELP MYSELF.

I WENT HOME. I was so mad. I just went to my room straight. My mom asked me if I was okay. I told her I was fine and she should leave me alone.
I was in my room for 3 hours straight. I wanted to stay alone just alone.
But I was hungry, I went outside. My sister and mom was sitting there. I told them I wanted to eat something. Mom asked me sit down.
"Hon."
"Yes mom."
"What is wrong with you?" My sister asked.
"Shut up idiot. I don't wanna talk." I told her.
She went inside her.
Mom was sitting next to me. I started eating. You know, I always knew you were my softie. Hon what's wrong?
She patted my shoulder.

I was literally holding my tears. But I couldn't. I brokedown.
She held me up. She was just listening to me. I told her what just happened today. I really hated the way I was feeling.

She told me. If I love her, I should tell her. It doesn't matter if she is with Lucas. I told her I don't wanna be heartbroken. "Then you should write your feeling down." She told me.
It'll help you so much. It always work out. Try to divert yourself. I really hope you get what you truly desire for.
I was feeling better. I went to my room and opened my drawer and took the drawing of nighttime. She reminds me of nighttime. She is so much like it.

SHE IS SO HARD BUT SHE ALWAYS MELTS MY HEART.
SHE IS SO HARD BUT SHE IS SO SOFT THAT I CAN'T EVEN HOLD HER.

I WANNA BE SUN TO HER DARKNESS.

She is not dark, she makes my night shine. She makes my eyes blind by her light.

I KNOW I SUCK AT WRITING SUCH STUFF BUT NO MATTER WHAT HE LOVES EVELYN.

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