ALL THE GOOD THINGS HAPPEN TO ME

CHAPTER 12

I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S BEING A WEEK SINCE WE STARTED THIS FAKE DATING THING. IT WAS SO MUCH FUN WITH HIM BUT I THINK I LIKE HIM. I KNOW I LIKE HIM BUT WHAT ABOUT LOVING HIM? 

I was sitting on the benches of the soccer field. I was there sitting by myself.
I was figuring out what is wrong with my life. Fake dating just to show people I was over my ex. I never wanted this in my life that's one of the reasons I avoided relationships.
I saw Aiden coming towards me. He asked me if I was okay? I said I was fine. Maybe we should go inside. Yeah sure he said.
I stood up from the bench.
We were close to each other again. He could stare into my soul but I couldn't even glance back. He makes me weak and I'm not getting weak.
"Harry!!
"Where?" I asked
"He's coming towards us." He was standing in front of me and he was faced towards the campus so he could see if someone was coming.
"Fuck Fuck Fuck!"

He's far but I can say he's coming here."
"Why is he here?" I asked.
"Only if I know."
"Just act normal and go with the flow. Let me handle this. Okay turn your emotions off." I Said.
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Now my hands were in his hair. I kissed him. It was just another new feeling. I didn't look behind. I just kissed him and he kissed me. We kissed until I lost my breath. Goddamn! His lips on mine, I could feel his breath getting heavy. His hand on my cheeks agh! I felt like I was in the cloud and I wanted to stay there forever. It was like volcanic eruption in my mouth. I couldn't even handle myself. He was like an addictive drug and I was consuming it even though I know it'd kill me
"Damn Eve, you're not as bad as I thought." He said.
"Whatever, you were good too and looked professional."
"Professional without any experience."
"Btw, did he see us?" I asked.
"No, he was never there." Wtf!
"I won't believe you again I swear." I rolled my eyes.
I was done when I kissed him.

I went to Mia.
"Mia, I did something?" I said.
"What exactly?"
"Like sucking Aiden's soul."
"You mean you kissed him." She was so calm.
"What is wrong with you, he lied to me that Harry--"
"Girl he's so in love with you." She said.
"You said the same thing about Harry when I was about to break up with him."
"Yeah but listen, you didn't feel anything for him. But ask yourself what you feel for Aiden but never felt for Harry." She advised me.
"You sure about it?"
"Hundred percent."

I was constantly thinking about what Mia said. I didn't want to think about it, but she was kinda right. I felt so so different for him. Never ever felt that way for anyone in my entire life. I was just unlovable but I wanna love him so bad. If I be honest I tried to love Harry but something felt terribly wrong. But with Aiden maybe I just wanna deny the fact that I love him 'cause of everything Harry and Hina went through because of me. I hurt their feelings 'cause I didn't recognize mine. I never really knew what I wanted. That's the reason I am going through this.
I need to accept the fact about who I love or not. It's maybe just an attraction. I am sure it is. Yes it definitely is.
It can't be love.

Play "Please don't say you love me" by Gabrielle Aplin.

I was in math class when someone gave me a note. It was from Aiden, he was not in class. The note says

MEET ME NEAR BENCHES OF SOCCER FIELD.

I went there after my math class but I saw him with Stacy. She was in his arms and she was crying badly maybe because of me. I could see them clearly but they couldn't. I didn't want to see anything further. I was controlling my anger and emotions....
He called me so I can see he loves Stacy and they both are low-key together so I should stop this fake dating thing.

I went to the canteen and I somehow told some people that we broke up. Not directly but in a way that people get the idea. I was quite successful. People were talking about it. I was not feeling better by doing it but at least this is what he might have wanted.

"Evelyn." Mia came to me.
I heard you guys ended the fake dating thing. She whispered.
"Yeah he likes Stacy and they are kinda close so I felt weird."
"What-"
"Listen Evelyn."
"It's fine I should go home now."
I left her behind and didn't look back. I was not feeling good. It was my chest that was hurting so bad.
I just ran home.

I opened the main door with my key. I knew mum would be at work. I have plenty of time to get over him and work with my emotions. I never felt this way before for anyone, at least not when Harry hurted me once.
I went to my room. I switched off my phone... I opened my laptop and played some songs to feel better. All of it reminded me of him.
Fuck him.
He's all over me now. In my head, he left his traces on me.

I went to take a hot shower. I undress my self and sat on the bath tub for an hour. It was so relaxing and I felt a little better.

I took my towel and wrapped it around my body.
Someone was on the door and I peeked through the window of corridor upstairs. It was Aiden. Fuck, Fuck, Fuck.
I didn't respond. Let him do what he wanna do. After sometime he left.
Thank God.

I AM SUCH A MESS WHEN HEARTBROKEN. I went downstairs and I wanted to eat pizza, watch girly movies.
I ordered a pizza, Classic pepperoni pizza..
It was on time. I took my order and went inside.

I ate pizza and watched a movies. I was feeling better. Wow It's always fun to watch girly movies. It's necessary when I wanna motivate the girl inside me. The girl inside me is amazing but the witch inside me is deadly. She can eat people alive. The witch one is my usual self.
After eating pizza, I made myself iced coffee. I am so good at it but I still want Starbucks cause I love procastination. I drank it and I was quite tired but not sleepy due the strong coffee I just drank.

I was laying on my couch. I played something good on my laptop. My all time favorite motivator, TheWizardLiz. She's so amazing and gives the best advice.