The winner takes it all

Deliberations and revelations

Chapter 10

Minor family mansion - the night before the
wedding

Vegas and Macau both lay sprawled out on Macau's king size bed watching 21 Jump Street and eating a variety of junk food.
"So Hia, on a scale of 1 - 10, 1 being totally chill and 10 being shitting your pants scared, how nervous are you for tomorrow?" Macau asked his big brother.
"I don't get scared, what are you talking about Macau?" Vegas dismissed his little brother's question despite the butterflies he felt inside.
"Hia, come on. Tomorrow is the biggest day in your life so far, you must feel a little nervous at least. Not even a teeny tiny bit, not even a smidge?" Macau pushed a little to see if his older brother would admit to his true feelings.
Vegas looked into Macau's eyes then sighed in defeat. All his life Macau had been the only one he could truly be himself with, the one person he could show any vulnerability to, though he often tried to disguise his true feelings in order to protect Macau. However, five months ago he had met another person he could show his true colours to, a person who knew him even better than Macau did. Pete is someone he could truly relax around and be himself with, the love he felt for Pete could never be broken, whatever the future may bring. There was now two people in his life that he wouldn't hesitate to lay down his life for. He smiled to himself at the thought of Pete and the short time they had spent together, before Macau interrupted his fond memories.
"Hia, stop daydreaming of P'Pete and answer the question will you".
Vegas shifted a little and turned to lay on his side to face Macau.
"Yeah, I'm nervous. But I'm not shitting bricks or anything like that. I don't know, it's a good kind of nervous, like a nervous excitement" Vegas admitted.
"That's cool, I would be worried if you didn't feel at least a little nervous, it wouldn't be normal. Dad and Pa are handling all the security arrangements and Pa seems to have eased off on his shitty attitude towards us. Do you think Dad has had a word in his ear?" Macau asked thoughtfully.
"I think so. Pa wants Dad on side to gain more power and he would do anything to achieve that" Vegas answered.
"Well, whatever happened life's been a lot more bareable around here lately" Macau forced out a small laugh to mask the melancholy he felt inside, though the foul smelling pheromones he was secreting were a tell tale sign of his true feelings.
"Do you think we can really trust Dad and the rest of the family? I mean, I believe in P'Pete and and trust him implicitly but, I don't know, it's hard to accept it when other people show kindness towards you. I always think they have an ulterior motive. Pa has ruined our trust in other people" Macau said sadly.
Vegas opened his arms and Macau scooted closer to lay in the protective embrace of his Hia.
"Dad's first priority will always be his own children and I can respect that, but I do believe he wants us both to be part of his family. I think as long as we don't betray him he will look after us too" Vegas reassured Macau, totally unaware of Kan's presence outside of the bedroom door listening in on their conversation.
Macau suddenly started giggling against Vegas' shoulder, "when we refer to them as Dad and Pa it makes them sound like they are a couple. I like spending time at the Saengtham mansion, it's nice to be around a family who gets along with each other, not that you're not enough. You have always been enough for me but we always have a great time at P'Pete's house. It's nice to go there and have a break from all the crap that goes on here" Macau admitted a little tearfully. Vegas released some soothing pheromones in an attempt to calm his brother.
"Pete will come and live here with us after the honeymoon, I bet he will bring a little sunshine to the place. This house will become a home when Pete moves in. Besides, Pa will behave himself when Pete is here. He wants Dad to backup his future plans and he won't get that support if Pete is unhappy or scared" Vegas said as he stroked Macau's hair softly.
When another, now amused sounding laugh escaped Macau's lips, Vegas couldn't help but quiz him on his sudden change of mood.
"What's so funny?" he smiled, he loved hearing the sound of Macau's laughter. The air around and them changed from a sour and bitter smell to something that resembled strawberry jelly.
"When we refer to them both as Dad and Pa, it makes them sound like a couple" Macau continued to giggle, causing Vegas to join in too.
The brotherly bonding session was interrupted by an abrupt knock at the door.
"Come in" Vegas shouted, angered by the sudden intrusion, 'this better not be some fucking bullshit emergency. Is it too much to ask for just one quiet night?' he thought angrily.
Kan took a deep breath before entering into his youngest son's bedroom. This conversation had been long overdue and no mission he had ever faced before had struck as much fear inside him as the one he was facing right at this very moment. Overhearing his two sons conversing about how he had destroyed their self confidence and ability to trust made him feel overwhelming feelings of regret and remorse in what he had thought was his long dead heart. He had been a shitty father, he had known that all along but he justified his actions to himself by telling himself it was to make his children strong. They had to be strong so they could face their uncle and help take him down. Hearing Macau's words made him realise he had taken the wrong route and done everything the wrong way. After a stern talking to by Mr Saengtham he also realised he had to make amends with his children before it was too late. His children should have been the most important reason why he had kept going all these years, but an overwhelming desire for revenge against Korn for taking away his beloved wife had taken over. He now realised pushing Vegas and Macau away had been a grave mistake. Mr Saengtham had also warned him he wouldn't allow his son to move into a home were he would be unhappy or unsafe and if he wanted his support in the future he had to do something to fix the situation. Mr Saengtham's support was only one of the reasons he had to change things, secretly deep down he had always wanted his own relationship with his children to improve, he had stupidly convinced himself that creating a distance between them would keep them safer from their evil uncle's clutches.
As he entered the room, he noticed both his son's body language become tense and Vegas placed himself in front of Macau to protect him, as he always did.
"I would like to talk with you both" Kan said seriously before he checked to see if the bodyguards were obeying his orders of standing guard at the end of the hallway instead of directly outside the door. He closed the door carefully then made his way towards the bed.
"Is it alright if I take a seat?" he asked while gesturing towards the end of the bed.
Vegas and Macau looked at each other with widened eyes in disbelief. They couldn't believe what was happening, their father never asked for their permission, he just ordered them around and took whatever he wanted. What was going on? The strawberry jelly smell in the air started to become overpowered by a stinking smell vaguely resembling sulphur as Macau started to release fearful pheromones.
The sight of his children being so unsure around him felt like repeated stabs to the heart, but he knew he only had himself to blame. Kan began to secrete his own calming pheromones in an attempt to counteract the sulphur smell. He didn't want Macau to be scared of him now.
Macau nodded to Vegas and then his eldest son said it was fine for him to take a seat at the end of the bed. This was the most nerve racking thing he had done in years, all the missions and the vicious gangsters he had faced were nothing compared to the almost impossible task of being open and honest with his children. He knew it was now or never, he had to try to tell them 'his truth' and do his best to make up for all the awful treatment he had dished out to them over these past fifteen years. With the plans had had concocted he may not be alive much longer and he wanted to attempt to make things right if the worst should happen to him.
"Now I'm sitting here in front of you, I find myself at a lost for words so I'm just going to start talking and I hope you will both hear me out before you tell me what you think about it". Kan took a deep breath and began.
"I know I have always been an awful father, the worst in fact, but I need to tell you why I did those detestable things because I want to try and put things right between us. Everything changed after your mother was taken from us. I know your uncle is the one responsible but no matter how hard I tried I couldn't find any evidence against him. Your mother, she was so precious to me, she was my other half. When we first met she saved me in so many ways, she gave me a reason to carry on and when she gave birth to you boys she provided me with two more reasons to live". Kan took in another sharp breath and tried his best to hold back his tears, still being too ashamed to show his true emotions in front of his sons. After fifteen long years he still found it hard to talk about his wife, even now the pain seared through him like an indescribable torture. The memories of her smile and laughter still lingered in his mind both haunting and taunting him with each passing day.
Vegas and Macau glanced at each other in trepidation. They had never seen their father like this before, the man only ever showed anger or irritation towards them. Was this some kind of joke? Was this some cruel new torture their father was planning to inflict on them? Was this a way to manipulate them into committing some other terrible act, other than the ones he had already forced them into? They both stayed silent, waiting to discover what their father would do next.
"Anyway" Kan continued, "after we lost your mother, I was unable to function. I felt dead inside and Vegas my son, you remind me so much of her. I couldn't bare the pain of seeing a little version of her, each day being reminded of what I'd lost, so I shut you out and distanced myself from you. It was selfish of me, I know that, but I felt like I was drowning in grief. I wasn't able to be a good parent to you at that time".
Macau wrapped his arms tighter around Vegas, seeking comfort from the extremely confusing situation. Vegas sat silently, still as a statue. What did his father expect from them? Did he really think he could say a few apologetic words and all would be forgiven? A lame apology could never undo all the hurt and pain his father had inflicted upon them, especially the damage he had done to Macau's mental health. What on earth were his father's intentions? Was this genuine or some elaborate hoax?
"Korn killed your mother to hurt me, to keep me in check, so I would continue to do things his way. I couldn't let him take you both away from me too so I pushed you away. I pretended I didn't care about you so you wouldn't become his next targets. My brother is a monster, he's far more dangerous than you could ever know, he would even dispose of his own children if he thought they had become a threat to him. He would think nothing of harming his nephews. I couldn't then and I still can't bare the thought of loosing you too. I treated you both despicably over the years, I was verbally and physically abusive, I wanted to harden you both so you could grow up strong and resilient. I needed you to be able to cope with the harsh realities of the fucked up world we live in. I never considered the opposite may happen" Kan glanced regretfully at Macau for a brief moment before quickly looking away.
"I know there have been so many things I have done and said that are unforgivable and nothing can excuse any of my actions but I need you to know, I do care and I do love you both. I was so proud every time you won a prize at school or passed your exams and when you graduated. As more and more time went on, the harder it was to change my attitude and I want to sincerely apologise now for everything I have done" Kan said forcing himself to make eye contact with the two boys who he had hurt, despite the shame he felt inside.
Vegas shut his eyes to blink back the tears that threatened to fall, the man in front of him had drilled it into him he should never show any weakness. He took a few deep breaths to calm himself.
"Can we take our turn to speak now Pa?" he said in a chilling tone.
"Go ahead son" Kan permitted. Kan remained alert, he was expecting Vegas to lunge at him at any moment, he knew the monsterous side of his son that he himself had created and cultivated these past years. If Vegas was to come at him this time he would try to restrain him instead of beating him.
Vegas could no longer contain his anger and the air around him turned thick with the fragrance of rotting patchouli leaves.
"What do you want from us both now? Don't you think you have taken enough? You robbed us of our childhood. You stripped us of our confidence and self respect. You ground us down until there was barely any humanity left. If it wasn't for Pete, who knows what would have become of us both" Vegas spat while he tightened his grip around Macau who clung to his protector while trying his best to muffle his heartbreaking sobs.
The regret swelled inside Kan until he thought he may burst from the burden. These two boys had his wife's blood running through their veins, they were the only connection he had left to the love of his life. If only he could turn back time, he would leave with his wife and children, he would go to a place far away and he would never look back. If he had done that nineteen years ago then their family would still be complete and they all would have been happy together.
"I don't know what kind of game you are playing...." Vegas began.
"There's no game" Kan interrupted, he knew his sons wouldn't believe his words but he had to try, things had been put in motion that couldn't be undone. If all his plans went awry, he could at least let his children know his true feelings towards them, feelings he'd had to bury for so long under the constant threat that was Korn.
"Why now? Why are you saying this now? If this is some fucked up plan to mess up my wedding, so help me God I will finish you myself" Vegas threatened viciously.
"You're getting married tomorrow and that's a big milestone in anyone's life. I don't want to spoil it for you, I want you to be happy. I just don't want you to make the same mistakes I did with your own children" Kan answered as honestly as he could at this moment in time.
It was a half truth, he did want Vegas to be caring towards any future grandchildren he and Pete may produce but he couldn't tell the whole truth just yet, it was too early to bring Vegas in on the plans. He wanted his son to enjoy his wedding, honeymoon and the beginning of married life first. If possible he now wanted to exclude Macau from taking part altogether, the boy was in no fit state to take on his uncle. Kan decided in that moment to protect Macau in the same way Mr Saengtham planned to protect Pete. If the plans paid off he could ensure his family's safety and secure their future.
This honesty thing was draining Kan with every passing second, he had expected this conversation to be difficult but this was beyond anything he had prepared himself for. He had always prided himself on his strength but this required a lot more strength than he had imagined.
Vegas was torn, on one hand he had wished to hear these words from his father for years, on the other hand the man had broken his trust so badly, so many times he could not just forgive and forget.
What to do? He had his priorities and his father was no longer top of his list, Pete and Macau's safety was all that mattered to him now. He decided to play along for now until he saw which way the cookie would crumble. By no means did he trust his father but he could keep a close eye on him and observe until he discovered his true intentions. He had to make a decision quickly. Pete would be moving in soon and he didn't want him to feel uncomfortable or afraid in his new home. Also if he could improve the situation for Macau, even if it's only temporarily, it would be worth it.
"Ok" Vegas said cautiously, "you have one chance, if you fuck this up then don't you dare come crawling back for a second one. I will take Pete and Macau and any children Pete and I may have and leave. You will never see us again. Do we understand each other?"
"Thank you son" Kan breathed a sigh of relief. He was grateful for this chance, Mr Saengtham was right, children are the most precious things a man could have. The reality check Mr Saengtham had given him had been very much needed.
"Can I hug you both....please?" Kan asked hoping he wouldn't be rejected, he knew he had to swallow his pride if he was to make any progress in improving his relationship with his two boys.
Vegas gave him a long, hard chilling stare, scanning his father from head to toe looking for any sign of Kan carrying any concealed weapons. Kan felt chills run throughout his whole body.
Vegas asked Macau if he was ok with the idea, all that mattered to him in this moment was how Macau was feeling. Macau looked at his father in confusion. Why did he want to hug him now? He couldn't recall it ever happening before. Macau avoided eye contact with his father then muttered a timid "ok". Hearing his younger brother's confirmation, Vegas gave Kan a stiff nod of the head.
Kan moved slowly towards his children as though he was approaching a flock of birds, one sudden movement and they would scatter and the moment would be lost. He then took his children in his arms and lightly pressed them to his strong chest. He breathed in their scents of patchouli leaves and strawberry jelly and savoured the moment. The hug barely lasted more than a few seconds before Macau started to back away, closely followed by Vegas. It was a small, sweet gesture that had been all too brief but was long overdue.
"There is something that I need to discuss with the both of you. Everything I have said today is true, I know it will take time for you both to believe in me but I just want to let you know that the bond you have with each other is one of your biggest strengths. You need to protect and cherish that bond because not everyone is lucky enough to have that. My brother and I definitely don't share such a bond" Kan said as his tone turned far more serious. "Your uncle is the biggest threat to your safety, more than the Yakuza, more than the Italian Mafia and more than any other rival gang. The atrocities that man has carried out is far worse than anything we have ever done. In order to protect ourselves we need to pretend that nothing has changed between us. We need to maintain a distance in public so he doesn't suspect how much you both mean to me. From this day on I won't hurt you with my fists or my words when we are at home. I sincerely promise you that, but in front of your uncle we have to act as we did before. I may have to say some things that will hurt your feelings but just know, I don't really mean those harsh words. I am doing this to protect us all. I couldn't protect your mother but I intend to protect you" Kan promised while softly squeezing the shoulders of both Vegas and Macau.
The more Vegas took in those words the more they started to make a little bit of sense to him. His father's logic of distancing himself from them was twisted but he decided to go along with things for now. "Ok, I agree" Vegas replied curtly, "what about you Macau?"
"Ok, but don't be too harsh with your words, sometimes they cut deeper than a knife wound" Macau answered tearfully.
"I will be careful my son" Kan said as softly as he was able, though the tone was still a little gruff. Showing affection still felt alien to him as he hadn't done it for many years, not since Vegas and Macau were very small children.
"Congratulations on your marriage Vegas. Remember to take care of Pete well. The best advice I can give you is always communicate with each other. If you experience any type of difficulty you must stay and talk it out. The most important thing is never and I mean NEVER cheat on your spouse. A real man honours his wedding vows" Kan said determinedly.
"Thanks but I have absolutely no intention of hurting Pete. I will treat him like royalty and I will never hurt him, ever" Vegas vowed.
"That's good son, just remember if anything should ever go wrong and God forbid you loose him, another fated mate may come your way. Just remember the sequel is never as good as the original. You must protect Pete with every fibre of your being, no one will ever be able to replace him" Kan said brimming with sadness.
"Did someone else come along after mum died?" Macau asked curiously.
"Yes" Kan answered slowly, "six years after your mother's death I met a male Omega and we recognised each other as fated mates. I was in no state to care for anyone else. I was still grieving for your mother and I couldn't bare the thought of letting someone else in just to loose them all over again. I broke the bond and sent him away".
"Do you regret not taking a second chance on love?" Vegas asked shocked at this new information.
"No. No I don't son. I sent him away for his own good. He now lives a good life away from this dangerous world and is married with three children. He is happy and that wouldn't be the case if he had remained here with me" Kan said, forcing a small smile.
"Maybe in the future someone else may come along" Vegas said arkwardly. He had no idea what else to say even though the thought of someone else trying to replace his mother made him sick to his stomach.
"It's ok, I experienced true love once and that's enough for me" Kan answered truthfully. Vegas couldn't help but respect Kan's perspective on this matter, he knew he could never love anyone with the same intensity as he loved Pete.
"So are we all agreed on the plan?" Kan asked.
"Yes" Vegas and Macau answered in unison.
"Enjoy your day tomorrow Vegas, don't let that little twat Kinn spoil it for you, honestly a five year old is more mature than that boy". Kan wished his son well before he made his excuses to leave. He thought they had talked enough for now and they would have to take things slowly for any trust to grow between them.
"Macau won't be here either for the next week. He is going away on a college field trip so he will come back the day after Pete and I return" Vegas announced.
"Ok" Kan smiled, " have a good time on your trips and I will see you both in the morning. Make sure you both get a good night's rest" he said before ruffling both his sons hair softly and exiting the room.
Vegas and Macau waited a few moments in silence as they tried to process what just happened.
"So what do you think?" Macau asked in a state of bewilderment.
"I can't forget all the shit he has put us through but I'm going to go along with it for now. Just keep your guard up" Vegas advised before he encouraged Macau to go take a shower before promising his little brother he would stay in his room with him for the night.