Destiny

11.I miss him so much

Win

I cant believe my eyes when i manage to get info regarding bright issue. How could he stay with the rapist. I really cant understand. I conclude that bright still in the dark and bible play his game right. I need to safe bright from this ruthless monster.

Win, you are being unreasonable, my dad said seriously. I told you before, if you want me take over, dont ever question my method or style i said coldly. Win, what happen to you, why you behave like this, please its been years. Bright wont come back, my dad said. He wont, but i will bring him back, i said. No, cant you understand, we need heir. He cant produce your heir. It will make him more suffer to be your secret partner , my dad yell at me. Like always, i ignore everything and focus on my work.

I told you before. Dont expect anything from me i coldly talk to emely. I know, she said. But i love you phi she said slowly. Stop all this bullshit. I wont marry you i said and leave crying emely.
I know she was also presure by her and my family. I dont want anyone except for my bright.

Lets go, i quickly run to my car. After 2 years i finally found bright adress. He really smart and adorable. I know he wont stay with bible. I know he wont forgive bible easily. I pray hardly. I want my baby back. Please, i just need to meet him. I will make sure everything will back to normal. I cant believe he only 2 hours away from me. Lets go i said when we arrive at beautiful farm house. I can picture him with the nature. This is totally his dream house. I must be crazy. How could i forget it. Break it, i said when the door are lock. I quickly get into the house but everything was empty. I cant see his single trace. I cant help but to yell. I miss him again.

No, i push everything on my table.
I cant believe my eyes. No this is lie. Bright wont agree to marry bible.
I can see my secretaries run to me but too scare to get closer. I wont let it happen. I promise i wont let it happen i said. This is absurd, how could he agree to marry bible. I need to save him from that mafia. Please baby, dont do this, I pray hard. I will lost my chance if they are married. I need to do something.
But my enemy is so powerful. I cant even find my love and I dont even know their marriage date. They only announce their marriage and keep it low profile. But the marriage of the richest man won't be that quiet. Every single magazine's, newspaper and every chanel keep reporting their marriage. Bible make sure the world know, both of them are couple. I cant see a single negative comment to their relation. He is that strong and brave. He powerfully declare their relation. What I can do except for blaming and angry with myself.

Boss, my man try to stop me, but i coldly push him and keep drinking. Phi, emely from no where stand beside me. Go away, i yell at her. Please phi, she said. Lets bring him home emely said to my man. That really anger me. Before i start yelling, i felt dizzy. I cant stand properly.

I cant believe my eyes. I can see emely now black and blue. I can see she is being mark all over her body. I must be crazy. Get lost, i yell when she look so scare waiting for me. With all dificulty she try to leave. Bring her home, i instruct my man. I look at my bleeding hand and broken mirror. What have i done. I wish i can kill emely but i cant. Deep down in my heart, i know i need to do this. I only can make bright my lover but not husband. I am willing to give him everything. I sometime wish, i dont love him. Its killing me. I cant fight with my traditional family. I also cant leave my responsibility. I wish i am strong enough to fight the world for him, but i really cant. I have some many thing that i need to care. I cant let my parent die. I cant let my family destroy. Sometime i dont know what is my life purpose now.
I am trying to bring my love back, but i dont know what will i do with him. I am the worst lover. I hate my destiny.

I miss him so much today. There are times I felt like crazy because I miss him so much. After a long meeting i finally can sit and look at his picture. I miss you baby, i said. I dont even care about my tears. I miss him so much. I still try to find him but i really dont have a clue.
Bible never bring him to the public after the announcement. Someone who help me now cant be reach now. Maybe bible already find out about the informer. I am really angry and confuse. What should i do. I love him so much.
I look at the engagement ring at my finger. May be this is the end of my love.
Maybe this is the end of metawin life.
I cant even find emely to abort the baby, or i just dont try hard enough.
I know i dont. I am too dissapointed with bright marriage announcement. I really cant accept this ending. Win, phi joss who know our story call me. He look at me dearly and hug me tight. I am hurt phi, i said. I know, keep strong , you are doing great he said again. Why he leave me phi, what i do wrong, i ask phi joss. I dont know, maybe he know he cant be with you, phi joss said. One thing for sure, he love you more than himself, phi joss said. He will sacrifice himself for you, so please be strong and dont waste his sacrifice , phi joss said again. I look at phi joss who now leave me alone.

Who want his great sacrifice, i need him, i need him to be with me. I cant help but to become selfish. I am a bad guy. I really a bad lover who cant promise anything to him. I just love him with my full heart but i cant promise to make him my partner or husband to the world. I am a loser who only love him so much. How will i live after this. If he is married, i cant chase or bring him back to my life. What should i do. I miss him so much

05.10.23