Brunette Bitch (beeduo high school AU)

Bubble Popped

!!mentions of sa and inculdes the word r-pe

ʀᴀɴʙᴏᴏ pov:

Every kindergarten teacher told their class about personal space. Mine told us about personal bubbles, and how everyone should respect it. If one person pops it and word gets around, than everyone will be touching you. Mine was always big. I never wanted people to touch me or get near me. That was until him. He would always touch me, and poke at me knowing damn well I hated the way it made me feel. I always felt like I had to have my defense up. Until you came into my life. The way you made me feel so... comfortable, and cherished. I guess it was always just a game to you. And I hate that idea. I hate the way he made me feel loved, and happy. I should've known better. He  told me that no one would ever love me, or care for me. He always was my truth, because I thought everyone else was mean. He  always told me, "People will use you. They'll take everything from you, they'll leave you defenseless, but I won't" Then he would flash a toothy smile. One I thought was genuine and loving. I guess he  was the snake. But he didn't lie. Unlike Tubbo.

I shrunk my bubble for him. I let him in. I let Tubbo in. Not "oLivER". My personal bubble for Tubbo was perfectly non-existent, But for Oliver, it's basically skin tight, It's too small it's making me shrink into myself and I can't breathe. I can't control my body anymore. He's taken my body and he's using it. And all I have is the bubble around my brain, protecting me from thinking that I am his, and all hope is lost. But I'm starting to think that even there, there's a hole in the bubble, slowly letting him into my thoughts. I don't own my own body. Oliver does. And now I'm forever not mine. 

I don't  want it like this. I don't want this. I don't want him touching me. I want my space back. I want myself back. I want freedom. I want myself back, even if it makes me selfish.

I try to think of something else because this is stressing me out. But my mind only thinks of Tubbo. How our hands fit perfectly together. How he would sometimes purposefully rhyme whenever Tommy was sad. I wish he was here, hugging me and holding my hand. Telling me everything will be okay. 

The bubble was gone.  He got into my brain. I started thinking that this was the end and that I deserved it. If I hadn't broken up with Tubbo, I wouldn't be here. Being raped. Being toyed with. This is wrong and I know it. But then why am I still stuck in place?

Someone came into the house.

Someone walked up stairs.

He  Walked in on us. Well, more walked in on Oliver. Him intoxicating me, seeping into my brain and making me unable to move.

"O-oliver? R-Ranboo?" He eyes darting between us. I finally had time to blow another bubble. I pushed him off of me and gathered my clothes, which were strewn across the boxy room.

"What the Hell?!?" Oliver exclaimed, and for once I was happy James was here.

I had finally just put on my clothes and rushed to a random room. I could hear them from the door. I was in a bathroom.

"OLIVER! ANOTHER?! HOW MANY PEOPLE. HOW MANY VICTIMS WILL YOU HAVE?!? I GUESS I'LL NEVER HAVE FRIENDS AGAIN THEN, HUH?!?"

"HOW MANY POOR PEOPLE WILL YOU HURT?!? YOU'RE TWENTY-FIVE GODDAMNIT, STOP USING YOUR YOUNG LOOKS TO TRICK PEOPLE INTO SEX? DID HE EVEN WANT THIS? STOP TARGETING MY EX-FRIENDS. THIS IS WHY I'M LONELY. THIS IS WHY WE MOVED. WE MOVED SO YOU'D GET AWAY FROM MY PAST FRIENDS! DID YOU EVER THINK TO PUT YOURSELF INTO MY SHOES. NO ONE WANTED TO TALK TO ME. NO ONE WANTED TO BEFRIEND ME. EVERYONE HATED ME BECAUSE OF YOU. I DIDN'T WANT TO BE MEAN TO EVERYONE IN MIDDLE SCHOOL, BUT YOU RUINED LIFE FOR ME. I'VE BEEN SUFFEREING AND CLEARLY YOU COULD CARE LESS. I KNOW YOU ONLY WANT IS SEX YOU DUMB WITTED, UGLY MAN WHORE!" I could hear someone walking towards me after a door slamming. I started shaking scared it was Oliver again. There was only a polite knock at the door. I sniffed. I was already crying. I'm such a baby.

"Hey, it's me. Nice to see you again, I know you really don't like me, but I'm sorry. Oliver has been raping all of my past friends. The cycle goes like this: I meet someone, I bring them to our house, and I leave them there alone, to get food, to buy something, to get something they forgot, and every time. Every goddamn time, I'd come back to see a monster in my now ex-friend. And they all blamed me. Even if they asked me to get something for them. They all blamed me for it. They resented me. It made me so mad. But I never told the police or my parents, because I was scared. I was scared they would be just like all my ex-best friends. That they wouldn't  care for the full story. Or at least my side of it. So I tried to become meaner, I thought if I was mean to people, or more toxic, than they wouldn't want to go to my house, and they wouldn't get into the hands of Oliver. That's why I seemed so mean to you. I was protecting you. I was trying to save you. I didn't think you deserved to be bullied to me, but being bullied seemed way better than being raped by that bitch. So I kept going until I left the school. I'm so sorry. I guess he wanted my entire collection of friends. I tried so hard to protect at least you, and even then he still got to you. I failed. I'm sorry." We were both crying by now. The way he handled our old friendship was a bad way to get rid of Oliver, but there was a method to his madness. And I never cared enough to hear the full story. Or at least his side.

I opened the door and gave him a hug. Secretly, we both did exactly what the other was scared of. Me, being bullied. Him, a story untold, never fully understood.  And I feel terrible.

1089 words

Please find help if this has happened to you.