Getting You Back

Chapter Twenty-Eight: The Waiting Game (Harry's POV)

    The ambulance comes to a harsh stop in front of the hospital causing my back to slam against the wall of the car. The paramedic team picks up Halle's gurney then carries her into the hospital, taking her out of my sight. I run in after them, trying to keep Halle in my constant line of sight. Right when I enter, I see nurses surround her then roll her away from me and down the hall to the "restricted" area.
"Wait, stop!" I yell after them, hoping they will give me some answers before they take her away. I push pass people so the distance between us doesn't get any bigger than it already is. The farther away from me she gets the less of a chance I have to know what is going on. Hands come on my chest, keeping me hostage and restraining me from following behind Halle. As they pull me back my sweetheart gets pushed farther and farther away from me, farther from my eyes, farther away from my protection.  She begins to get smaller causing my heart to race in my chest and my anger to rise inside me.
"Get off me you motherfuckers!" I thrash against my captor, nudging him with my elbows and pushing it away with my fist. Black spots cause my eye sight to go fuzzy as my anger gets the best of me. Hands come on my arms, trying to restrain me and get a hold of me. My balled fist shove against the hands and hit back. 
"Calm down son or we will be forced to arrest you." With defeat, I slump down in the security guard's arms. Being locked up behind a jail cell won't do Halle any good. The guard's hands release from my arms causing red marks to appear on my skin. He places his hand on my shoulder but I shrug it off and head over to the check-in desk.
"And then she told him to leave the city. Yes, girl the city." The bottled blonde receptionist sits in her seat with her left cheek leaning on her hand and the phone pressed to her right ear. I stand in front of her, waiting for her to acknowledge me but she continues on as if I am not here in front of her.
"I told her that he was no good." I glare down at her, hoping she can feel the holes I am burning into her head with my eyes. But just like a second ago, her eyes don't even look up at me. My foot begins to tap against the floor with my irritation.  The longer she is the longer it will me to catch up with Halle. I tap my foot faster hoping that the noise from my shoe will catch her attention. 
"Excuse me!!" I finally yell at her. She jumps in her seat and looks up at me. I glare at her, hoping to intimidate her enough to get off the phone and assist me like she is suppose to.  She covers the bottom part of the phone with her hand and looks up at me.
"Fill out the paperwork please." She hands me a clipboard then returns to her conversation. My hands begin to shake at my sides while the colour of my face goes from pale to red. I drop the clipboard on the ground causing everyone around me to stop. I go behind the counter then grip the phone from the counter and pull it up, detaching it from the landline and ending her conversation.
"You have no right..." She stops short when she sees me towering over her with a red face and a heaving chest. When her eyes connect with mine she takes a step back. She cowers away from me in fright. Slowly, with a shaking hand, she detached the phone from her ear.
"Excuse me miss."  I growl out. "You are doing a shitty arse job. I have a girlfriend who is hurt and I need to know what room she is in, what they're doing to her, and what level. Can you please give me a fucking moment and talk to me." By the end of my rant I feel my heart racing while my chest heaves up and down. A nameless woman comes over to the nurse and whispers in her ear. Her eyes widen with each word that she is being told. When her eyes connect with mine the colour in her face fades away.
"I-I am so sorry Mr. Styles." She rushes to her computer and frantically types across the keyboard. Whether she knows who I am or not I am getting back there with my girl.  I glare down at her causing her fingers to move faster along the keys. She dares not to make a mistake after what she has just done. "Halleiana Marie Martinez. She is on the eighth floor in room 806. She is getting prepped for emergency surgery right now." My heart drops at her words. Somewhere in this hospital a scalpel is piercing the delicate skin of my angel. Somewhere in this hospital her life is on the line and I am not there to make sure those doctors are doing everything they can to make sure she survives.
"If you like..." Before the nurse can finish, I turn on my heel and run to the open lift at the end of the hall. My boots slip against the floor causing me to slide into the lift. Harshly, I press the eighth floor button then impatiently wait as each floor pass slowly.
"Come on, come on." I press the button repeatedly, knowing the constant pressing won't help but trying none of the less. Right as I am about to beat on the button the door open. Right as I step out I become lost in a maze of white wall and hallways that look the same. Left or right?
"Mr. Styles?" Before I can make a decisions a petite nurse is standing in front of me with a small smile. She stares at me nervously, she must be aware of my meltdown. "Um...Stacy called me from down stairs. She wanted me to tell you that Ms. Martinez is still in surgery. There is a waiting room for you to wait in." She beckons me with the wave of her hand. I follow behind her wordlessly, tired. There is nothing I can do that can get to where is she. Like many people here waiting for there loved ones, I have to play the waiting game and hope for the best. She opens the door to a private room. "Please tell us if you need anything." When she leaves, I lean against the wall and place my face in my hands.
"How did this happen." My head begins to feel a bit heavy and there appears to be three clocks rather than one mounted on the wall. With a deep breath, I slide down the wall and sit down on the floor. I bring my legs to my chest, resting my forehead on my knees.
"Please baby." I sniffle out. "Be okay, you have to be okay." I cry to myself. I pull my knees to my chest and wrap my arms tightly around my legs. I hold myself tightly so that I won't break down into tiny pieces in this waiting room.
It's all your fault. You're the reason she is in here in the first place. You're the reason why you will be alone.
I begin to rock back and forth as my own thoughts begin to turn on me. She was going to forgive me, she was going to let me back in her life despite what I had done. Halle wanted one thing, that was for us to start over. Just because I didn't get my way I got mad causing her to get in that damn taxi in the first place. If anything happens to her it will be my fault. Even though it hurts, I begin to think of life without my girl. A life where it is just me as if I have never met her to begin with. But I come up with nothing. There is no one I can see myself with but her, there is no one else I want to see when I come home from tour or who I want to cuddle up with at night. Every thing I could want in life, marriage, travels, children, includes her. I see her in all white walking down the aisle to me as I wait patiently for her at the alter, her on the sandy beach of some island taking in the sun during our honeymoon, her stomach rounded with my baby. Everything I could possibly want in life includes her. I pull off the necklace that hangs from my neck and bring up to my eye level. Resting on the chain with my cross is the gold rose band and H charm she use to wear. Gently, I caress the cool metal with the tips of my fingers. I put my finger through the tiny hole of the ring and press it down as far as possible on my finger. The small band stops just below the end of my nail. She never took it off once I put it on her left hand. I wanted people, more so the wankers at her school, that she's mine. That I had her heart and it would stay that way. But I also wanted wanted something to remind her of my love. My job has me travelling all around the world and it also brings many downsides. I wanted her to know no matter where I was in the world, that I would come back to her and that I would love her more than I did the last time I saw her. They say absence makes the heart grow fonder and I can honestly saw that absence makes you fall harder. The more I was away from her the more I craved her. I craved her arms wrapped around me, her smile, her warmth, her love. I raise the ring towards the light then tilt it slightly.  There, engraved in the tiny band is Us Against The World .  It was just me and her, battling what ever came our way. I look down at my hands when the memory hits me. 
I look down at her as she sleeps comfortably on my chest and her body is snuggled close to mine. Her skin is soft and warm. Our skin pressed together radiates a warmth that only we could create. I count each beat of her heart as it beats against my chest. Moments like this I swear our hearts are beating at the same time. How could someone like her, happy, perfect, smart, could want someone like me?  My life is never constant, the craziness, the fans, the paparazzi, and my schedule. Yet through it she has never complained. She has never asked me to choose her over my job. I slip my arm beneath her back and gently pull her tighter against me causing her leg to come across my hips and her left side to lay on me. The small movement cause her to move in my arms and for her eyes to slightly open. I press a kiss to her forehead causing her to sigh in her sleep. I rub my hand up and down her back soothing her back to sleep. When her body goes limp against mine I reach into the night stand to my right. I pull out the black velvet box then open it. There nestled in the soft fabric is the rose gold band I picked out just for her. I pick her hand up and gently slide on the ring on to her slim left finger."It's just you and me my love." I whisper into her skin.
I replay the memory over and over in my head, memorizing every detail possible. The colour of the boxers I was wearing, how my shirt looked on her smaller frame, how her skin felt against mine. Every emotion and feeling that course through me when I think about that memory is locked away so when I need it the most I can pull it out of the memory box and use it. I have replayed the memory over and over in my head that I jump when I pick my head up from my knees. The memory made me forget where I was sitting and what I was doing here in this hospital. Just for a second it felt like we were back home in London, locked safely in my flat and snuggled close and warm in our bed. But we're not, we're here. Then what's the point of being together? My words come back to mind, haunting me. Why would I tell her that? How could I even think that? We could be at the top of the Empire State Building, holding each other and whispering sweet words to one another. I should of never thought so words, let alone say them to her. The point of being together is that our relationship brings me something that my job, my family, and friends can't provide. Our relationship gives me a reason, it gives me standards, and it is a constant in my life. The door to the room bust open, causing the handle to hit against the wall and me to jump in my spot. Isabelle runs into the room frantically, her face is stained with tears and her skin is red. Her eyes are bloodshot and puffy. Her hands shake nervously at her side with her worry and anxiety.
"Harry." She cries out in a hoarse voice. When I look up at her I burst into tears when I see some of Halle's features in hers. I want to be strong enough to console her like a man should but how can that be true when I am just as weak? When I don't know if everything is going to be okay. Isabelle drops to her knees then wraps me in her arms. I bury my head in her shoulder and I cry. We both let everything out and sob. 
"She is going to be okay?" She whispers in my ear. Though she is trying to be strong for the both of us I can hear the ounce of doubt she has.
"I hope so Isabelle because if she's not I won't be either." 
"Harry?" Once again my name is called out. This time standing in front of me is my entire family. They look at me but they don't speak. Gemma looks at me then to my mum, she is trying to say something but she knows her words won't help me. Rather than speaking, both my mum and Gem, sit beside me on the floor and wrap their arms around me. My mum begins to run her fingers through my messy hair, trying to sooth me and Gem merely puts her hand in mine. As soon as they get comfortable the door bust opens again. Luca and Elliot run into the room. They are dressed in jumpers and joggers. Like the rest of us, their eyes are red and puffy. Both walk pass me and into the arms of their parents. 
"Mom, dad have you heard anything on bug?" For his height and age, Elliot sounds so small, almost like small  broken child. It is a side of Elliot that I have never seen before.
"No one has told us anything." Isabella rest her head on her husband's shoulder then closes her eyes. Both Elliot and Luca turn to a chair, seeing me in the corner of the room a crying mess yet they say nothing. It doesn't bother me that they look at me like am scum. Why beat a dead horse? I rest my head against the wall and close my eyes. For the first time in a long time, in the comforts of my mind, I pray. I pray to the mighty man who created this earth, who created my angel. 
"Please Lord." I say the words in my mind as if I am speaking out loud. "I haven't prayed in a long time and I am sorry. All I ask is that you keep her safe. Keep my soul safe because is all that I need. Please." When I open my eyes the clock mounted on the wall is in my direct line of sight. Endlessly the hand moves with each tick mocking me with each minute that pass. Each minute that pass I become more anxious for someone to come in to tell me the worst hasn't happened. 
"You have to stop shaking Harry." Gemma whispers to me.  She places her hands on top of mine but the pressure from her smaller hands doesn't stop me from shaking in my spot. I release my hands from hers and bury them in my pockets.
"Once she's okay Gem I will be fine." I keep my eyes trained on my feet so I don't have to look in her her eyes. Gemma turns her body to face me. Her gaze burns holes into the side of my face. She knows me better than I know myself. Gemma knows if Halle goes so will I.  She pulls her legs to her chest then rest her head on my shoulder.
"I know what you're thinking Harry." She warns me with a strong voice, one that would normally come from my mum or Nan. I place my hand back in hers then give her fingers three light squeezes. "And you know I wouldn't be the same without her." The door to the room open causing us all to stop breathing for a moment. Gem holds on to my hand a bit tighter and my mom puts her arm around me. A name with scrubs comes into the room. His eyes scan the room, taking in all of us. The thing that scares me the most is that he looks at us with cold, emotionless eyes. I freeze in my spot when his grave eyes land on me.