If Only You Knew

Chapter 18

A few days have gone by since I last seen Scarlett, we haven't talked since I told her how I feel. But today while I was on my run I got a text from Colin which was odd. He told me to come to Scarlett's house to talk. So after my run I took a quick shower and headed over to the house. Once I got there, I sat in my car for a few minutes taking deep breaths. Then finally I got out and headed up to the front door. I knock a couple times and am met with Colin smiling at me. "Hey Y/n, come on in." He moves to the side allowing me to walk into the house. "Just go in the living room, I'll grab Scarlett." I nod in agreement and walk into the living room, taking a seat on the couch. My anxiety slowly starts creeping up while I sit in silence.

Minutes later Scarlett walks in with Colin right behind her. Her eyes widen seeing me, "Y/n!? What are you doing here!?" She looks back at Colin who laughs awkwardly.

"Wait you didn't know I was coming over?" I ask confused, looking back and forth from the two of them.

"No! Colin a little warning would've been nice!" She huffs at him crossing her arms across her chest. She then turns back to me and stares silently into my eyes.

"Sorry Scar. Let's sit down and talk" He grabs her arms ushering her over towards me. He sits her down on the couch at the opposite end from me then stands in front of us. "Listen. I'm aware of what has been going on. And you two need to calmly talk it out. No interruptions or anything. Rose is at her dad's and I will be upstairs waiting." He smiles over at me then he turns to Scarlett and squats down in front of her grabbing her hands. "Whatever you decide to do, I'll support you" With that he smiles kissing her forehead then walks away, up the stairs.

Me and Scarlett lock eyes and stare silently for longer than we should have. "Scarlett... I'm sorry for how I told you about my feelings. I didn't mean to blow up"

"It's ok... I'm sorry for pushing and for how I reacted." She looks down at her lap, spinning the ring she has on her finger in a circular motion.

"To answer your question... I started to really like Liv. And I wanted to try to move on since you have Colin. I just didn't want to fawn over you while you were with him so I started dating Liv." I sigh leaning back on the couch, watching her facial expression.

Her face softens and she lets out a sigh as well. "That... makes sense." She whispers not making eye contact with me.

"What did Colin mean by he'll support whatever you choose? What choice do you have exactly?" I look at her, my brows furrowing in confusion and slight worry.

"Wh-What!? Oh uh nothing." She laugh nervously starting to wave her hand back and forth.

"Scarlett. I know you're lying. So what is it? What was he talking about?" I ask again, in a softer tone this time.

She meets my gaze again, her eyes now glossed over and her cheeks turning pink. "You remember... how you asked if I have a crush on another woman?" Her voice is quiet as she speaks while her fingers still twirl the ring on her finger around.

"Yea.. why?"

I watch as she takes a deep breath and slowly exhales not breaking eye contact with me. "I do have feelings for a woman..."

"You do? Who is it?" I ask surprised and still confused on where this is going.

"It's uh..." She stops taking another deep breath. "It's you." My heart stops hearing what she said, my jaw drops as I just stare at her in shock. "Say something please."

"I uh. What!? You have feelings for me too? When did you start having these feelings?" I ask trying to keep my self calm, which isn't working very well.

"Since you started dating Liv. I didn't hate the idea just because of our history. I figured out it was also because I have feelings for you." Scarlett starts to shy away, scooting farther away from me as she speaks.

"I mean that.. makes sense I guess.." I say staring blankly at her still. I take a deep breath seeing her start to get visibly more anxious. "I'm sorry I just.. I need a minute to process this information." She nods silently and turns away from me. I sit silently, my mind racing with thoughts. I sigh thinking about my break up, and about Scarlett being with Colin. "Scar, you're my best friend, and I do have feelings for you. I do want to be with you but I know I just got out of a relationship and you're obviously still in a relationship..." I lift myself up and move over now sitting right next to her. I reach over and grab her hand giving it a soft squeeze. "I will go with whatever you want to do. If you want to try and date then we can. But if you don't want to and you just want to be with Colin... then I'll respect your decision. I just don't want to loose you." She looks up at me with tears in her eyes as I smile softly back at her.

She takes her free hand and wipes the few tears that rolled down her cheeks. "Can... can I kiss you? I want to see... how I feel when I kiss you." She asks softly while squeezing my hand tighter.

I blink surprised at her question and chuckle nervously. "Oh um sure. But what about Colin?" I ask not wanting him to be mad about this.

"Trust me he'll be ok with this." She says grabbing ahold of my face. I nod silently, not questioning it any further. Then she pulls me in to her, crushing her lips onto mine passionately. My instinct causes me to wrap my arms around her waist and pull her closer to me. After a few moments she pulls back, both our faces completely red now. "Wow.."

"I uh.. I need to talk to Colin. Can you wait here?" She asks still holding onto my face.

"Yea of course. I'll be here when you're done." I smile, my cheeks red and hot still. With that she nods, kisses my cheek and walks away. I melt into the couch amazed that we just kissed. I wonder how their conversations going to go.