12 Steps to Not Fall in Love on Wattpad

STEP 10

Don’t make plans for the future. You’re not gonna last, especially if you’re not on the same page.

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I overthink. That’s not news. 

But this time, I let it eat at me for a whole week when I could’ve just asked.

Here’s what happened: I love planning. It makes me feel grounded, like I have some control over my life. So when I found a real way to visit her country, it stopped being a distant dream and became something I could actually do. 

Of course, I got excited. I started picturing everything—our first date, the places we’d go, the things we’d finally get to do together. I brought it up a few times, expecting her to share that excitement, but every time, she’d avoid the topic. 

And that’s when the overthinking kicked in. 

What if she didn’t actually want to meet me? What if this whole thing only worked because of the distance? What if I was making plans for something she didn’t even want? 

I carried that weight around for days until I finally did the one thing that should’ve been obvious from the start: I asked. 

Her response? 

"I just want to make sure you're focusing on yourself and your dreams instead of giving them up just to be with me."

Oh.   

I’d convinced myself she was avoiding the conversation because she wasn’t as serious about us, when really, she was thinking about me. She didn’t want me to change my life for her. She wanted to make sure I was chasing my own dreams, with or without her. 

Which ugh, I get it now. We’re in this together, but we’re still our own people. I have my goals, and she has hers. That doesn’t mean I can’t include her in my plans—it just means she wants to know that I’d still be happy even if things don’t go exactly as I imagine. 

And I would be. Because I’m learning that love isn’t just about wanting a future with someone. It’s about making sure you’re both growing, with or without it. 

But yeah, she’s definitely still coming to our Hogwarts wedding.

XOXO
Weddings expert, Nini