(Audience applauds)
MC Imperious Joe: Alright, alright we're back yo, I think we've all just about gotten over what Connor said... alright up next, we got... is this even a legal name?... Pea Dough File...
(Audience murmurs)
Pea Dough File: There once was a little boy
Who got a very large toy
He played with it for hours, oh what joy
He took it when he went to see Roy
Him and Roy enjoyed it all day long
But he had to go home soon, oh how wrong
Roy's mum rang his mum over the phone and asked if he could sleep over since he had grown
His mum said yes
But make sure he doesn't make too much mess
He promised to be on his best behaviour and thanked both their mum's, their playtime saviours
After playing for ages it was time for bed
To rest those little tired heads
They both went to sleep and had the most magnificent dream,
They were playing with the toy again and it made them both gleam,
They woke up in the morning and played some more until they heard a knocking at the door
The boy said to Roy "I have to leave ya, but come to mine for tea we're having pizza"
He said "yes of course" with a smile on is face
"I'll bring some of my toys to add to our playtime place"
(Audience muffles )
MC Imperious Joe: cut his mic, cut it yo! Somebody get this kiddy fiddler out of here! We do not condone pedophilia in any way, shape or form...
(Audience applauds)
MC Imperious Joe: moving swiftly on to our next act, it looks like we have a classical poetry theme going on here with my home girl Elizabeth Onyx
(Audience applauds)
Elizabeth Onyx: Sally needed help with her violin,
she knew Sedrick plays so she would dial him,
He said "theses beautiful strings are magical things"
"Grab onto the bow and go with the flow"
He played her a tune and she picked it up soon
Some beautiful notes that floated like boats
It was truly beautiful like an exotic bird, it was the best bit of music Sally had ever heard,
She plays it wherever she goes and everyone in the neighbourhood knows
If you hear that sweet little Sally
All day long you will always be happy
(Audience applauds)
MC Imperious Joe: yeah, that was real sweet yo! Next to grace the mic is this dude, he goes by the name of Da SkairKrow!
(Audience applauds)
Da SkairKrow: The friendly scarecrow stood in the field
The friendly scarecrow would not yield
The friendly scarecrow attracted all the birds
The friendly scarecrow did it without saying words
The friendly scarecrow stood proud and always smiled
The friendly scarecrow got all the birds whether native or wild
The friendly scarecrow loved them all
The friendly scarecrow cherished their calls
The friendly scarecrow listened to their songs
The friendly scarecrow listened all day long
The friendly scarecrow was always there
The friendly scarecrow would always care
The friendly scarecrow was always so good
The friendly scarecrow was more than a hat and some wood
The friendly scarecrow was the best ever
The friendly scarecrow would last forever
(Audience applauds)
MC Imperious Joe: that was almost as strange as the spelling of your name, we got some dyslexic ass spellings going on here, but it's cool though, half the culture is just spelling words as incorrectly as you can while still maintaining the coherence of the word... but here's a man who has a regular ish name, the man who's rapping to make money, they call him Revilo!
(Audience applauds)
Revilo: Imperious Joe you must be delirious bro, I'm making some serious dough from being your mysterious foe
My rhymes are finicky, my dynasty is like a ministry of rappers in synergies rapping to infinity like the holy trinity
I'll give you a glimpse into a Whacko's Hell, standing in Taco Bell with a tobacco smell, smack noble gents and laugh as the saddos fell, then I sell these rhymes that are as valuable as black opals
There's always a fatter whore that'll shatter floors, I batter four of these bulls in tatter stores like I'm a Matador
They don't get much fatter then your mother though Joe, she's a hoe so it's alright to insult her like she's a hobo...
MC Imperious Joe: hey what you say about my mother bitch!? I'mma fuck yo ass up for that shit you...
(BANG, BANG)
(Audience gasps)
Revilo: fucking blabber mouth, all bark and no bite... well that concludes the 5th annual National Poetry Event sponsored by Gola bags, Loom Bands and a bunch of other shit that hasn't been relevant since 2010, join us again next year for another National Poetry Event! Goodnight!
(Audience applauds)
YOU ARE READING
Hip-Hop 50th Anniversary Celebration
PoetryHere are a few poems/ raps written in the styles of some of the songs and artists that inspired me to write rhymes! There's even a couple of skits thrown in for comedic relief as well as to appreciate the fine art of skit making on Hip-Hop albums T...
