Live To Love You Freen&Becky Kathy&Lina

That morning never came

ATTENTION: SENSITIVE CONTENT, MIGHT BE TOO CRUEL 

-Kathy, please, please tell me it wasn't him.

-It was, it was his first day here, i was one of his first ¨ patients ¨ here. 

-Oh, Kathy, did he hurt you?

-Well, it was the first time a man touching me, seeing me naked.... he was sitting in the chair looking at the process of 2 women forcefully taking my clothes off, he had those eyes, when you know immediately, that is a bad , bad person, heartless...

FLASHBACK

He was sitting on the edge of the chair, touching himself above his trousers... i was crying and just had a feeling that this is the end, i'm losing myself, my body, my life.... 

They pushed me on the chair, and forced me to sit still. I couldn't, i was shaking, i was crying so hard i could barely see what was happening, i couldn't breathe...

-Calm down, aargh, i had enough of these criers, where are the normal, smart girls?

-She is almost the last one, only 2 more girls. 

-We don't know that yet,- he smirked and looked at me,- but let's check this one, I think this is the one, mister ...

-Yes, yes...

-Fine,- he slapped my tights with both hands and came closer to me,- let's see, let's see.

I could feel his fingers touching me, and that was it, i don't remember anything else, i fainted, and woke up of the slaps, one of the women was slapping me, like i was her biggest enemy. 

-Enough, enough, she is back, she can go.

They put me on the ground and i got dressed, i was dizzy and disorientated, but i put my clothes on as fast as i could. 

-Go, from that door and wait,- she pointed at the door on the other side of the room and i did as she said. 

I walked out and there was a big white room and girls from our line were sitting there on the floor... i let my back down against one of the walls. 

 I looked around me, trying to find Roma, but she wasn't there, girls were sitting there, everyone was sobbing whilst hugging themselves. And i would love to cry too, but somehow it was total emptiness inside of me at that moment. I was blankly looking around me... 

-Get up everyone, and go to your rooms. Dinner at 06.00 pm.

We all walked out and headed to our rooms. 

Some people were busy near the doors, i think they were changing the locks or something else, i don't know, although it was too complicated just for the lock. I went inside, i really wanted to fall into Lin's hug and was hoping that she didn't need to go through that too. 

But the room was empty, i went to her bed and sat on the floor next to it, i took the edge of her blanket, which she is normally hugging and hugged it, instead of her, feeling her smell. That was enough to make me to brake down into tears, i couldn't believe what just happened, i couldn't believe that my parents agreed to this, am i that bad daughter for them, am i that disgusting for them, why are they so cruel to me.... i sat there for probably 20 min, but then decided to take a shower, maybe that would help me to feel a bit, just a bit cleaner, i really hated me and my body right now. 

...

I walked out of the bathroom and they all were already back.

-You can't take shower in the middel of the day,- Robbins came to me almost yelling.