The trail and error of life

Chapter 21.

"Amu!" Ammi screeched as soon as her eyes landed on me. She soon engulfed me in a bear hug while I stood there still with my two full hands, trying to bite back my tears. She pulled back and wiped her tears while I choked on mine. "Beta, are you sick? Come inside. You look so weak and tired. How long have you been sick? And you didn't even tell me? Must be skipping all the meals!" She complained as she pulled me inside the house. "Ammi, breathe" I tried to calm her down as I placed my bags down and made her sit on the couch. "I'm breathing just fine! What are you talking about?" She retorted. "Fine, you are breathing fine. But you don't mind sitting with me for a few minutes now do you?" I asked, amused by her antics. " I know you think I'm crazy but I don't want to waste my time defending myself. Come here my bachi! Oh! How much I missed you!" She whimpered as she pulled me into another hug making me lose control. I cried along with her as we stayed like that for a few minutes. We haven't seen each other in the last three months since my marriage. My heart suddenly sank at the thought of the marriage. "Ammi..." I trailed off and soon she pulled back. "You know I was being wistful about you today? Well yeah, I always do but today I made palak paneer and my heart ached thinking how you are not here to fight with Abhi for all the paneer" Ammi said with a chuckle as she wiped away her tears. "Aw, Ammi.... Oh yeah... speaking of, where is Abhi?" I asked suddenly remembering the little devil of a brother I have. "Oh! He has gone out with Zayaan. And yeah, Zayaan has been staying here since yesterday. He'll leave tomorrow. They are just hanging out. You would know if you'd answer my calls or at least call me once in a while" She sighed getting up and I looked away. "Wait! Where are you going? Sit with me for some time!" I whined. "I'll go get you something to eat and drink. You look so weak and tired. We have the whole d-wait when are you leaving? Ammi asked as she was about to enter the kitchen. "Umm...Ammi-" "Wait where is Kaif? Why didn't he come?" She cut me off. "Ammi, I'm really tired, I'll go freshen up and come" I said. I moved upstairs ignoring the frown on her face as I knew she must be suspicious about my lack of answer.

"Di!" I heard a scream before a weight fell over my shoulder launching me forward. "Abhi! don't jump on her, she's tired" Ammi yelled from the couch where she was cutting vegetables for dinner while I sat on the bean bag, watching TV. "Oh! So you finally decided to come home. Huh? You usually come home so late?" I faked anger as I pulled him off my back by his ear. "Ouch!" he whined as his crunched-up face came into my vision. "Missed you" He muttered, suddenly hugging me and I hugged him back. "Missed you too my baby" I said while I ruffled his hair followed by a snicker. I pulled back and looked around to find the source of the sound. I looked behind to find Zayaan standing there with a grin. "Di! Why did you have to call me that in front of him... Ugh!" Abhi whined making us all laugh. "Hey Zayaan, it's really nice to finally meet you" I said as I stood up and shook hands with him. He gave me a polite and innocent smile that melted my heart. I can now see why they have been best friends since the start of their college life. "How was the travel didi? um... I can call you didi right?" Zayaan asked awkwardly. "Of course you can. And yeah it was okay.. feeling a bit tired though. I have heard all about you but how come I never got to meet you or even talk to you?" I asked, indicating him to sit down. "That's because he is shy" Abhi teased him on his way to the kitchen. "I am not!" Zayaan yelled back making me chuckle. "umm... I stay at the hostel so I don't really get the opportunity to go out" He explained. "Why? You kids are like twenty years old right? Not even during the weekends?" I asked confused. "Um.. well what to say.. I have an overprotective family. But I dont know what magic Abhi did but he got me permission to stay here for two days." He shrugged and I nodded in understanding. "Di, are you going to watch the match with us?" Abhi said coming with a tray of popcorn, chips and drinks. "I think I'll pass. I'm too tired but you kids have fun" I ruffled his hair as I moved to my room.

The more I thought about it, the more restless I was getting. It was easier not telling her when I was away but I'm finding it nerve-racking now that I'm here. The anxiety of a mission undone is building up in me and the fear of worrying my mother is all adding up and proving too much to handle. I feel like I should just let her know. I walked towards my mother's room and I think with the boys upstairs and Ammi done with her Namaz, this would be the right time. No, no, it won't be. I stopped mid-way and turned around to go back to my room. Wait! No, there never will be a right time. I should do it now. With determination and a lot of anxiety, I walked towards Ammi's room. I knocked twice before entering. "Amu! Come sit here. I thought of letting you rest" Ammi said as she patted on the spot next to her on the bed. "So, tell me how's your office? You never explained your work and what was the project you were a part of? And yeah the trip too? So who are these new friends of-" "Ammi.." I cut her off, not meeting her eyes. "Amu.. What is it beta?" Ammi asked as she pulled my face to meet hers. "Ammi..." was all I could say as the tears started spilling off my eyes.