Blue Ribbon

Chapter 48 - My Family

"Our legacy is written in tear-stained ink;
my dear, tragedy, it runs in our blood."

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Nathan's POV

"Nathan," Christian's voice reverberated with desperation, "Lilly did nothing to you. Just let her go, please," He said, his words an anguished plea for her life, not that I was going to do anything to her anyway but it was nice to see him squirm, a small payback for what he did to me.

"Let her go and I will do anything you want, anything, just let her go—" Christian continued, his distress palpable into the air.

"I just don't understand," I interjected, my tone curious and detached, the notion too foreign to me, "What's so special about her?" My eyebrow raised, "She looks so basic to me. So, I'm just trying to understand—how did she get to have so much power over you?"

Christian's jaw tightened, a mixture of worry and anger evident in his eyes. Tied to the chair, he could only glare at me, "She is special to me because I love her," he grated out, the emotions boiling within him, "It's not my problem that you're fucking dead inside, and don't get that!"

I nodded, my lips curling slightly as I tried to think it through, "True, I've never been crazy about a girl before," I mused, my eyebrows furrowing in mock contemplation, "I wonder how that would feel," My gaze flickered all over Chritian's state, "It looks so exhausting," I nodded my head forward at him, "Considering your current miserable state."

Yeah, falling in love doesn't sound as fun as they make it out to be.

"Although I'm curious if such a girl exists for me," I continued, aware that time was a luxury I couldn't afford, "I prefer blondes, by the way, if you've got any of those lying around," Each casual word I uttered seemed to stoke and ignite the fury in his eyes, a reaction I took some satisfaction in.

"Nathan, for the love of god," He grated out, panting as he struggled with something deep inside, "Don't let them hurt her," He shook his head, "I would never forgive you—"

I shook my head, "I don't care for your forgiveness."

I leaned closer, my palms pressed on the chair's armrest, right beside his own, "Do you know how long I've looked around for you?" I spoke with a tinge of resentment, dredging up old bad memories, "You didn't even know me back then, and I had just gotten out of surgery, but the only thing on my mind was to find you. I knew you were out there, alive somewhere and I looked...looked everywhere for you," I added.

"I never stopped until I found you," I said, my words tightening the confused lines over his forehead, "I found you, living on the streets, starving, sick, and on the verge of giving up—"

My fingers tightened over the wood, my face so close to his and I wanted to fucking scream, "I gave you a home, I gave you someone, I gave you reasons to stay alive," I added, my anger mingling with a complex variety of emotions. Emotions I am not used to. Those that I didn't understand. Neither did I want to comprehend.

The weight pressed against my chest, tearing at the scarred tissues over my failing lung till it became so hard to breathe again.

"I was there for you when you needed someone and now when I need you the most, you turned your back on me and worked with those who were supposed to be our enemies!"

"We had a plan—" I added.

"You had a plan, Nathan," He interjected, his voice cutting through mine, "You had a fucking plan, not me," He grated out, the frustration painting his skin red, "You lied to me since day one, you lied to me even about your fucking name for god's sake," He added, accusing me too, "You lied and you manipulated me. To you, I was just a means to an end, a way to get in. You couldn't do it yourself; it was risky. They knew you, but not all of them knew me."