Blue Ribbon

Chapter 16 - Love is a responsibility, a sacrifice

Lilly's POV

My heart clenched so tight as he muttered those couple of words and walked away. Hurt wrapped me up from the inside out and I slammed my back against the locker, trying to hold into anything so I wouldn't just collapse into a million piece.

It was pathetic.

I couldn't stop my tears. My own self taunting me. I felt so pathetic at my current vulnerable state.

How did I reach here? How did I let myself open up for him? Why did I ever take that risk?

I knew it. From the beginning, I knew it would only end in heartbreak, but I couldn't stop myself.

Now, I learned my lesson.

With my hand, I harshly wiped the tears from over my cheek away. I am not going to cry over him. I am not going to cry at all. I am not weak. I will easily get over this. I have to.

I felt Zack's hand palm the side of my arm, "Hey, you okay?" He asked.

When I turned to him, I noticed the bit of blood gathering around the corner of his mouth from Chase's punch. My eyebrows pulled together, "I am sorry," I mumbled and he shook his head, wiping the blood with the back of his hand, he said, "It's not your fault."

It is. I should've never kissed Zack. Should've never got in between them. But what happened, happened. There is no changing it now.

"Lilly?" I looked at the other side when I heard Max's voice. His eyebrows pulled together when he noticed my red eyes and strained cheeks. The bag over his shoulder slipped to the ground as he rushed toward me.

"What's wrong? What happened?" He asked, worry flared in his words, shocked at seeing me in this state. Like I've said, I don't usually cry. But look at me now, breaking down over something so stupid.

I shook my head, "Nothing happened."

"Are you sure?" He asked, a bit bewildered at the fact my eyes are full with tears. I nodded and offered him a small smile, "I am fine, don't worry."

He didn't seem satisfied, he turned to Zack, "You didn't do anything, did you?" He asked, with his overprotective tone that he took over from dad.

I placed my hand over his arm, grabbing his gaze back to me, "He didn't do anything, I am fine." I noticed the people starting to come out of the cafeteria, signaling the end of the lunch break, "Now, get back to your classes."

Thankfully, he didn't argue further before he walked away, still not satisfied with my answer. Zack also didn't talk much as he lead me to the history class that unfortunately, we all take together.

My eyes found Chase first, he was already seated down, his elbow pressed against the desk, the side of his head laying into his palm and with his other hand, he was playing with the pen, twirling it around, totally ignoring me and everyone else.

I gulped down at the stupid feelings that kept stirring against my chest. I felt like I was about to cry again. I wanted to rush to him, hug him, explain all about yesterday and wait for him to tell me it's all just a lie. He wouldn't. I still couldn't believe it.

I felt Sally's hand pull me away from my trance and pull me into the seat next to her, "Please tell me that Aylin is lying."

I numbly shook my head in return. My eyes drifting to Aylin, sitting far away from us. I didn't know how to react. I wanted to be so angry at her, but then I had to convince myself that she didn't know about me and Chase. If she knew, she would've never. Yeah, she would've never done anything like this.