Fresh Hope

18 it cant be that bad

Because Nicole had mentioned the sound check, the girls wanted to go. It's not where you want to be, but your friends have done a lot for you. It's time to suck it up.

Lee doesn't tell the others what's happened. You're not ready for them all to know, but also, you don't want to think about it. After some sleep and a hot shower, you're feeling a little silly  but still slightly pissed off. You could have dealt with it better. But you didn't. So now you just have to wait and see how things go.
Breakfast in the hotel restaurant and time to ice skate. "Look, it's on my bucket list, so we are doing it, get over yourselves," says Jade, who glides around the ice like she was born to do so. Meanwhile, Perry is getting the hang of it, and Lee and you are like Bambi on ice. After what felt like three months and being on your back more often than actually skating, it's time up. "Thank fuck for small mercies, I bruise like a peach and my peach has had enough."
You moan.
"Yeah, how did you get that one on your neck, you been doing cross fit again and not telling anyone.!" Perry laughs. What is she talking about. You pull out your phone and use the front camera to see. Shit, you have love bite on your neck. 'When did he do that'.
"Selfie time" Jade's on one today. Faces all smooshed together, she snaps the memory.
"I remember, she was talking to a chick last night" Perry says, " it was probably her that gave her that bruise"  everyone laughs, remembering last night.
Well your night turned out different. Still having mixed emotions about it, you push it from your mind.
"What time does sound check start?  We should head over!".
Lee checks over he card Nicole gave her.
"If we head over now, we can watch a few other artists and their sound checks, make a day of it." Walking the Six blocks from Rockefeller  centre to times square, the girls stop in at a liquor store, 

This celebration takes place over multiple cities and time zones and its a huge operation. There are hundreds of artists taking to the stage this year.
The crowd is a decent size but as its the day before its mostly die hard fans and tourists.
You make your way to one of the gates, give your name and the steward let's you in.
He give you each a gift bag. It's got a blanket, hot pockets and a flag.
"This is kl. I will keep this as a memento." The girls decided a few drinks would keep the cold away. They were right. Feeling like a teen at an adult club you have booze in plastic bottles. 
The music is loud and you can feel the base. After your home made measures the cold doesn't bother you and neither does being outside in broad daylight dancing with strangers. Your really letting loose. Not too loose that you are drawing attention to yourselves but your having fun.
Nicole spots you and comes to say hi
"Hey, I'm so glad you came. The guys will be on soon, you've never seen them live have you?"
She's teasing you, and you glare at her. Everyone laughs. "Hey, come dance with us"
"Ah, you know I wish I could, but I'm working" the sarcasm is dripping from her.
As she leaves you see her talking to a couple. 'Must be some managers or their families' you think. 'Fuck, she looks freezing.' Without stopping you find the closest Steward and tell him to send some gift bags over. That they, the couple,  are with the band and it will look bad if they aren't doing their jobs. He jumps into action and hands them a bag each. You didn't mean to be so formal with him. Still you turn and nod to the couple. 'She looks familiar' anyway back to dancing and having fun with the people you love.  Some of the tracks that are played, there is no one on stage. You think it will be artists that are in different states.

"Hey, let's move back a bit, there's more room and we will see better" suggests Perry. 
She right. Your all dancing and singing along, when a song comes on, you know the routine, 'shit it's the guys'.
Wow, they look so cool. It's an impulse.
"Kim Namjoon, Kim Seokjin, Min Yoongi,  Jung Hoseok,  Park Jimin,  Kim Taehyung ,Jeon Jungkook, Bts" x2.
Wow that's ingrained deep.
Your dancing and singing like a teen at her first concert. Everything forgotten. Loving life.
Its Yoongi that spots you and your friends, he waves. Some of  the guys see you now and wave too.  Wow they are amazing. Defo buying tickets for their next tour.
After the 3rd song you leave and head for lunch.
It's a really nice restaurant. You know it's expensive because the plates are huge and the servings are small  but the drinks, well, they are strong. Feeling merry, you guys walk back to the hotel.
"I saw one of the guys was watching you today, you might wanna check on that" says Perry. "The one with the brown hair, doesn't say much, that one"
Laughing, "That's narrows it down then. Only two of them have black hair right now" thinking about the members. You have a feeling she is talking about Suga or Jhope. "Yeah, I'm not opening that bag of cats"

The hotel have put on a random karaoke for the guests in the smaller lounge.  It's more private and off limits to the restaurant guests.
"Fuck it, let's have a sing song" says Lee as she marches in. You guys follow behind.
There's a few families singing Christmas songs. It's really relaxed and good fun.
The girls sing a few each. It's not for you, well after a bottle of whisky's, maybe but definitely not for the unsuspecting public ears.
Some hotel guests pop their heads in to see what's going on but after a while its just the four of you. "Maybe we should just take this up to the suite haha, we might be hogging the karaoke" Lee is loving it.
The songs are now your own choice. "Put on one we can all sing" says Perry.
'Lady marmalade it is' you can't help yourself. It's the only song they know you can't resist.
It's like a cats choir. The girls are no longer trying and you hold a tune as much as a strainer holds water. The song ends. Bowing to each other while holding on to your sides there's a round of applause. Spinning round you see one of the members. He's smiling and laughing, you know he's laughing at you but you don't even care. "Hey, come join us" you say. He waves his hands in protest, "No no I can't. I just wanted to check if there was an animal in pain" he's laughing again.
"와우,(Wow) , that hurts" you say holding your heart. Drawing a fake tear down your face. Everyone laughs.
"I will sit with you a white but I'm not singing" he says.
You all discuss your day. He tells you about how he thinks sound check went and his hopes for the coming year.
"Well the year to come can't be worse than the last half of this year, so I'm looking forward to it. Out with the old and in with the new" you say.
"You want another drink? "Asks Jade, her and Perry are already making their way to the bar. "Eh, yeah OK, would you like one too?" You ask. "No, no, I'm OK. I will drink proper alcohol when I get back to Korea." He laughs. Lee goes with them, "they will no doubt buy doubles and then drop them"  You really love your girls. 

"So what's new with you?" He asks. "Me, well not much but loads. Where should I start?" you reply.
"Well since Europe what have you been doing"
"Working, mostly, I've been all over Europe, been to Japan a few times and here in the US. Only been to Korea a few times", you count the places off with your fingers.
He asks about your time in Korea. "Well I went because of a guy. But that went south". He's interested and you give him the main points. 'Met a guy, started a relationship, got serious, he started his service, he married someone else and then tried to take me for half of everything. When he had nothing to half,' "Anyway. I'm sure your brother can fill you in, I don't spend my time talking about ass face is if can avoid it." He's kind and sweet to you and listens. You let out a very loud sigh.

"Wow, I didn't know that was in me" you both laugh. "What's going on with you, why the big sigh". He's really sincere when he asks. Looking in your eyes, "you can tell me anything".

You really feel like you can.
"Hyung in trouble. There has been some interest in me  from the guys, giving me compliments and flirting with me. Considering the last few months have been a shit show, I don't know whether I'm coming or going."   He looks so huggable and sweet.
Out of the guys he's the one you had thought of who would give balanced advice. He looks at you, with affection. You can see that he cares about you and it makes you feel relaxed and confident. " Nuna, there's no trouble you can't get out of, As long as you ask for help."  He's giving you the most gentle smile, So you say  " Nam has been flirting with me and Yoongi has giving me compliments too.  I have a friendship and bond with Hoseok as you know, but last night, it went further, then Hoseok and I had an argument, and we haven't spoken today, to clear the air".

"Well," he says putting his arms out to hug you, "in life we have to make choices, some of them are easy. Some of them are the hardest. I'm sure when you look back in time  this won't be as hard as you think." He looks at you, then asks. "when you say 'It went further?' do you mean it became physical?" His stare is intense and you feel as if your being scolded by an elder. Unable or unwilling to put it into words you just nod.

Its so easy to talk to him, even if he is being stern, he let's you work things out for yourself.
"Nuna, look at me, and really listen. You already know what you are going to do, but maybe you need a little more information to make the best decision."