Evermore | Sodapop Love Story | The Outsiders

Chapter 15 | Sick

"Soda, I'm sick, I'm gonna get you sick."

What did I do to hurt him?

That question lingered in my head for the entirety of the night. I got little to no sleep that night. Is Soda okay? Did I do something to make him mad? How am I going to tell Mrs. Curtis about the letter? Too many things are circling my brain.

I hate school. I hate my life. Things are just so unfair. I know I promised my mom I would try my hardest, but it's hard. Her being dead doesn't change it, the thing is, I didn't know if I would be able to do this in the first place.

I'm getting sick of trying and not succeeding. I'm close to dropping out and just giving up on ever going back. I'm not destined to go anywhere with my life.

...

That morning, I was like a zombie. I got up to start getting ready for school. I was so tired I thought I would pass out. My mind was foggy and I couldn't think straight.

"Elle?" I heard suddenly.

I was in the kitchen, sitting at the table, staring at it. I found Darry standing in the doorway, looking at me.

"Yeah?" I asked.

"Are ya okay?" He asked.

"Yeah, I'm just tired..." I mumbled.

"You look kinda sick." He said, walking over to me.

"I'm fine."

He put his hand on my forehead, I was too exhausted to protest.

"You seem a little warm." He said.

"I'll be okay." I said, giving him a look.

Mrs. Curtis came into the room at that point. Mr. Curtis was already gone, he must have an early shift to get to.

"Mom, I think Elle's sick." Darry told her. I rolled my eyes.

"I'm fine." I argued. Mrs. Curtis put her hand on my forehead. "She is a little warm."

"Go to bed." She ordered. I got up and did as I was told. There's no use in fighting at this point.

I don't think I am sick. It's probably because I stayed up all night. I'm exhausted and my mind is foggy. I don't even remember making my way to the kitchen this morning.

I wrapped myself in my blankets, hiding from the world. I was so comfortable, I could sleep. The only thing stopping me were my thoughts.

I thought about Soda, about my mom, my dad, and all the Curtis'. I feel so guilty by living here, taking up their time, effort, and money. They had three sons still living here, all with different needs, then they have me. I'm just a troubled teenage girl with nowhere else to go. I just take up their space.

I didn't cry though, I felt as if I was dried out. There's nothing left but the tiredness I'm feeling right now.

Time Skip

So it turns out I am actually sick. I don't know if it's horribly timed or stress induced, but either way, I feel like crap.

Mrs. Curtis came in my room every so often to check up on me. I was only awake some of those times. I just wanted to sleep, but I kept waking up.

Soon, I drifted off and didn't wake up for several hours. It must've been around dinner time because I heard the loud laughter of the gang and smelled food.

The scent made me want to vomit and the feeling of sickness made my eyes water. Not like crying, like you suddenly sneezed and your eyes watered in response.

I haven't been coughing a lot. I just had a runny nose, my body was weak, and I was tired.

My bed was surrounded by all the tissues I was using to blow my nose. My trash can was on the other side of the room and I didn't have the energy to go throw my tissues away.

My door opened and I thought it was Mrs. Curtis. Instead, I was shocked to see my mom come through the door.

"Mom?" I asked. My throat was scratchy so I coughed a little.

"It's me, hun." She gave me a hug. Something about this felt so unreal, but I was just happy to see her.

"Remember, I believe in you, and I will forever believe in you." She broke away from the hug. I looked at her with a sad look on my face. She began to walk away.

"Where are you going?" I asked, my voice cracking.

"Back home." She said.

"Wait don't go..."

I opened my eyes. Fever dream, of course it was a fever dream. The door opened again, but I didn't feel like talking.

This time, Sodapop was at the door. I was slightly disappointed it wasn't my mom, but she's gone.

"Hey Elle, how are ya?"He asked, coming up beside me and sitting in the chair next to my desk.

"Okay as I can be." Which wasn't exactly the truth, but it wasn't exactly a lie either.

"I guess that's good." He said. He looked really sad. I could tell he wasn't totally here. Something was bothering him. I sat up.

"Are ya alright, Sodes?" I asked him.

"Yeah." I could tell he was lying and I could hear his voice break as he spoke. I shuffled out of my blankets and hugged him, he hugged me back. I heard him sniffle.

"What happened?" I asked, rubbing his back as I hugged him.

"It's Sandy." He began. I hope she died or something. Honestly I would be relieved.

"Just...just look at this."

He handed me a folded up note. "It came in the mail."

I looked at him with an uncertain look on my face as I opened it up. What it said was just awful.

She cheated on him and had to move away to Florida because she got pregnant. She was going to move in with her grandmother.

The letter said how 'unbelievably sorry she was that this had to happen'. Most importantly it talked about how she still wanted to be with him.

"Oh Soda, I'm sorry. If she gave you this and cheated on you, she wasn't the one." I said.

"I just...I don't know what to do. She apologized and she still wants to be with me." How am I going to tell him that she doesn't really care without breaking his heart even more?

"Soda, someone who is willing to do that with someone else while they're dating you is someone who doesn't really care about you. You don't need her. Ya have the gang, your family, your closest friends. We love you." I told him.

He nodded sadly, hugging me again.

"Soda, I'm sick, I'm gonna get you sick." I joked.

"I don't care." He mumbled, not really caring that I was trying to joke around. I feel bad, the poor kid is heartbroken. I don't even know if the gang knows yet. All I know is that I want to find Sandy and beat her ass.

Maybe one day, I will.

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Published March 8th 9:52 PM EST

Words: 1121