A Game Of Hearts And Minds

CHAPTER XXV - Stupidity..

Sherlock's POV

Lauraine was up and running almost immediately after waking up, despite John's, Mary's and my pleas. There was still little traced of dried blood above her lip, and although she was moving, her movements were slower. She held her head high, but she seemed broken. Her skin was pale, paler than usual, there were dark circles under her eyes and she just.. she just seemed broken. I began to question her liability to carry out her plan, but above all, everything made me question if the doctors had been right about how long she had left. 

Her eyes looked vacant, hurting, and above all tired. The feeling of death clung to her body, and I could practically see the reaper sitting on her shoulder, awaiting for her to give up. 

The florescent light shone brightly on her face, and it reminded me of how beautiful she actually was. She was beautiful, but not like those girls in magazines. She was beautiful, for the way she thought. She was beautiful, for the sparkle she used to have in her eyes when she talked about something she loved. She was beautiful, for her ability to make other people smile, even if she was sad. No, she wasn't only beautiful for something as temporary as her looks. She was beautiful, deep down to her soul. She is beautiful.

She glanced over at the ebony grandfather clock that hung on our wall, watching the minutes tick by. Her eyes lit up as we all heard the chime of her phone go off, however, it was her ringtone, not a textmessage. Lauraine shot a glance at me, and I nodded approvingly. She then reached over to her phone and placed it against her ear. "Evening." She said calmly into the phone as I watched her with care, my eyes studying her carefully. "On with it, I have a deadline as you know."...."No, he doesn't." ... "Yes, I will come alone." ... "Wouldn't be fun if I told you now, would it?" ... "At seven, you know where." And then she hung up. 

"What did he say?" John questioned Lauraine from across the room. 

"We'll meet at seven. He thinks I'll be there alone. He also thinks that Sherlock, or any of you, don't know about the fact that I am already dying. He buys our story, it seems."

I looked at Lauraine, her eyes meeting mine. "It's three, do you wanna go out and do something together?" I asked, tears burning behind my eyes, but refusing to let them fall down.  "Why not?" She said softly, the fine tune of her voice in my ears. She turned to John and Mary. "Will I see you around 6:30 at the hotel lobby across from the hospital?" Marry nodded. 

Lauraine turned on her heels and walked back to me. "Let's go, shall we?"

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The city sprawled beneath us, a sea of lights flickering in the night. The rooftop of 221B Baker Street had always been our sanctuary, a familiar refuge where we shared victories and faced defeats. The soft hum of the city below was a backdrop of the weighty conversation that hung between Lauraine and me. 

She turned to me, her eyes reflecting  a mixture of sadness and vulnerability. "Sherlock, this might be our last case together," She confessed. Her words were heavy with the unspoken truth that lingered in the crisp night air. 

My gaze, which I usually kept sharp and confident, softened as her eyes met mine. "Lauraine, we've faced dangers before. We've always come out on top."

I didn't want to give up. I didn't want to give her up. I refused to believe that she would pass, and that this would be our last case together. A wishful smile tugged at the corners of her lips. "This time is different, Sherlock. My condition is catching up with me, the risks we're taking are higher than ever. I need yu to understand."

Her eyes searched mine, a silent acknowledgment passing between us. The reality of our shared fate hung in the air, and for a moment, the city below seemed to hold its breath, echoing the weight of our conversation back to us. "I can't let you go, Lauraine. Not alone, not now, not ever." I stated, my voice firm but laced with an underlying concern. 

"You won't be alone," She assured me, reaching out to gently touch my hand, our fingers entwined. "We've made a play. You have John, Mary and Mycroft. I know you don't want to let me go, and believe me that feeling is mutual, but I need to go."

My eyes betrayed a flicker of emotion, a rare vulnerability that I would only allow in the quiet moments shared on this rooftop.  "We'll make it through. We always do."

She smile, appreciating my attempt at reassurance. "Sherlock, you've been the closest thing I've had to a partner in this life. Our adventures, our puzzles - they've given me purpose. But now, it's time for me to face the inevitable."

A heavy silence descended upon us, the weight of our unspoken words echoing the stillness of the moment. The city pulsed around us, indifferent to the personal stakes at play. 

As we sat in companionable silence, the city below continued its relentless rhythm, unaware of the farewell exchanged up on this rooftop. In the face of uncertainty, we found solace in the shared understanding that this, indeed, may be our last case together.  

In that moment, I found myself wondering why I had even been so stupid to fall in love. Mycroft had always said that sentiment was a chemical defect found on the losing side, and that it would crumble you down to nothingness some day. And while I had always believed that, I still fell head over heels with the woman sitting beside me, her head on my shoulder and her tears seaping through the fabric of my button-up. I looked down at her, admired her brown eyes, her brown hair with its slight wave at the bottom, her facial features, the curve in her nose, her slightly puffy cheeks and every other part of her. 

Goodbye

Goodbye is an end,

but there is no end to the goodbyes

Haven't warm hellos

and farewell kisses,

met you are the same time?

Haven't you cried few tears, 

of joy mixed with heartbreak?

Don't you know by now,

sometimes our beginnings,

and endings are the same?

Leaves shed yet,

the roots may spread.

Dear heart,

drop the unused kitchen knives,

and the extra layers, 

so you can be found easily,

For when I must say goodbye tonight.