Hold Me Close

to visit is to judge

The next two weeks before the season starts are hectic. We double-down on training in preparation to dominate completely once again, and it is intense to be filmed almost every day.

The crew joined me the evening before the Ballon d'Or nominees were announced, mostly to ensure my reaction was well-documented seeing as I am lined up to win this year. They stayed for a bottle of champagne because Jaimie couldn't be there, and neither could Papa nor Mum. Talia was in a similar predicament, but apparently celebrated by finding someone to sleep with under an unassuming fake identity. "It was like celebration sex, except with a severe lack of emotion and anything meaningful," she said.

Aside from football, there has been a slight development off the pitch, in that Alexia and I went on our first official date just two days ago. It took place during a lull in training, brought about by the impending first match and how the staff do not want to injure us all.

Under strict instructions not to embarrass me (and definitely contradicting orders from my sister), I was only filmed before and after, with no guarantee of it making the final cut. Olivia helped me get ready once Esmee had left for another one of her self-discovery walks – something the poor girl has taken up after deeming herself camera-shy and abstaining from any involvement in the irritating process of filming a documentary. Although I was technically the one who asked, I let Alexia choose. I had not expected to be sent such a strict dress code.

We went to a place where she would have had to name-drop to get a reservation, unless she had planned the date months in advance and had neglected to inform me. Though the food was beautifully plated and paired well with the endlessly served glasses of wine, the company was much better. Despite spending a good hour discussing the surprise of Talia's loan to Manchester United (slight mood-killer), the date was successful, and there will be more.

Captured by the cameras post-date was only a tipsy rambling of how it went. "It's gold," Olivia repeated to me the next morning as I forbade her from ever letting it see the light of day. "You are so incredibly smitten. It will humanise you!"

As if to add to my stress, Papa decides to visit, with travel plans to Madrid and all. I have no space to house him, but he is content to be redirected to a nice hotel in the gothic quarter and explore the city by himself while Esmee and I meal-prep for the week and discuss how it is a big deal that she will most-likely make her debut for such a massive club soon, but that I am definitely more nervous to play that match than she is. "Daddy issues don't trump young success," she insists, but I refuse to agree and we spend the entire journey to Madrid arguing in hushed, sharp Dutch.

I am sure the other girls are scared of how we sound, but no one mentions anything until we arrive. Even then, it's only Ingrid, and with an amused frown; "Caro is too good at Spanish for us to do that. She refuses and claims I need the practice."

"Fleur gets in enough practice with–" But I cup my hand over Esmee's mouth and drag her away before she can finish. When we are in our room, which I had to beg Jonaton to let us share, she is content to continue on her never-ending pursuit of driving me insane. "Are you going to sleep in here, or are you going to sneak out and cuddle with your girlfriend?"

"Not my girlfriend."

"So you are!" She grins and I push her onto one of the beds very easily. I have been bullied by Jaimie my whole life, but now I have someone to use what I have learnt on.

"As a matter of fact," I begin, rolling my eyes, "I'm going to call my beloved sister and beg her to lose her final so that I am the better daughter tomorrow." As if Leah and Jaimie weren't disgusting enough already, they have been shameless in how happy they are to be reunited, seeing as Leah took four days off to surprise her girlfriend. While not necessarily a 'hard launch', they are doing a brilliant job of shoving their relationship in everyone's faces. Including mine.