Hold Me Close

found something odd

Alexia doesn't remember. She practically struts onto the plane, and I can tell she doesn't remember. I hope she feels my eyes burning into her. I wish looks could kill.

Usually, I sit next to Ingrid, but Alexia is far too close to the row I would be on, and so I seek out Keira and Lucy. With Lucy happily swapping so that she's sitting with Mariona, I easily get myself situated next to Keira. She always has episodes of Friends downloaded, and watching something in silence will take my mind off how stupid I have been over the past few days. How does one person make so many mistakes?

I fall asleep during the flight, but Keira shakes me when we land. "Lucy and Mariona took pictures of you because you snuggled into me like a little puppy," she says, patting my shoulder. "Oh, and apparently Alexia is hungover, so when they say her name, they're talking about that." We share the struggle of trying to understand the gossip, but Lucy seems to translate most things to Keira.

"Mapi was just saying that it's weird how she never drinks during the season, but every time you come," Lucy's index finger points accusingly at my chest, "she's hammered. You guys must really hate each other."

It clicks into place.

Alexia doesn't remember we kissed because she was so cocky about how much she could drink, surpassing her limits to the point of blackout. Yet another time her utter arrogance has been displayed to the world, and only I have the clear sight to see it. That woman thinks that the universe revolves around her.

"She's the worst," I reply, tired of this kind of conversation. I change the topic. "Have you two met my sister? She's going to stay with me next month."

They tell me that they have, and we spend the rest of the journey discussing how on Earth she and Leah Williamson ended up together. It's a bit of a mystery. Jaimie is normally one to stay away from relationships, but whatever. She's quite cryptic when it comes to the true details of her own life.

Jonatan starts me, and, surprisingly, holds Alexia on the bench for the first half against Alhama. She looks pale, but there is a fire in her eyes the minute she sees the line-up. This is the first time I will play on the left for Barcelona, and I think she leaves the changing room during the team talk to punch a wall.

I use this opportunity to add to my highlight reel. Jonatan needs to remember that I belong here, on this side of the pitch. It feels so impossibly good to have La Reina make way for me.

We win 2-0, and I'm awarded player of the match. They attempt to conduct my post-match interview in (broken) English, so Mapi steps in to translate. I'm asked what I think about switching to the right in the second half.

"I don't like it as much as my actual position, but La Reina gets what she wants, and she wants to play on the left. I can do both, but she can't. It is a compliment from Jonatan at times, I'd say." Mapi rolls her eyes, and I know she isn't saying exactly what I said.

"Congratulations," the interviewer says, grinning. I nod to her, turning to leave once the camera has stopped recording. She grabs my wrist to stop me. "Can I have your phone?"

It takes a moment for me to realise what she's trying to ask me, but when I do, I smirk. She's pretty, and I can't shake the guilt of kissing her so maybe I should just learn to live with it. The more people I kiss, the less everything will affect me, right? Scarlett would rather me sleep around than get into a loving relationship. Not that I can see one of those in my future.

"Would you like my shirt, too?" I ask her, tugging at the fabric of the Barcelona away kit. It's not my favourite colour, so I don't mind giving it away. She blushes and nods. I pull it over my head, handing her the shirt in exchange for her phone to type in my number. While I decode the Spanish, she stares at my sweaty body.