Project Athena | Reviews

Nirvasan (Nadia)

Author: Aspire1983

Genre: Mystery

Reviewer: SardonicBeauty

"Nirvasan" is an intriguing mystery-romance novel that delves into the lives of the Joshi Family.

From the very first chapter, the story unfolds with a sense of dramatic flair that could appeal to readers who enjoy soap opera-like narratives. However, the writing tends to rely on clichés and lacks the depth needed to fully engage readers throughout the entire book.

One aspect that could benefit from improvement is the opening chapter, as it initially feels melodramatic without providing key details about the timeline or introducing the characters effectively. Nithya's sudden change of heart regarding suitors lacks coherence, as the reasons behind her previous rejections are merely told rather than shown through dialogue or flashbacks. This makes it challenging to fully grasp Nithya's motivations.

The aunt's argument for marriage appears somewhat abrupt and simplistic. To enhance the understanding of her perspective, it would be beneficial to include more explanation and inner dialogue to reveal why she insists on her niece getting married.

Regarding Hemant's feelings for Nithya, it would be more impactful to show rather than tell the readers about his emotions. The fact that he feels a connection to her after she cares for his children could be conveyed through more tangible actions and interactions.

The inclusion of mature content in the story needs further contextualization. As it stands, it feels disjointed from the overall storyline and can be jarring for readers. When dealing with sensitive topics, such as assault, it is crucial to handle them with care and provide appropriate context.

Attempting to portray Harish Joshi as cold and detached does not necessitate the approach taken in the book. There are alternative ways to convey his character traits effectively.

Turning to the technical aspects of the story:

Firstly, the plot is somewhat unclear. It is challenging to discern whether there is a cohesive plot or if the story simply mirrors a spin-off of a soap opera.

Furthermore, the frequent location changes and time skips within chapters lack coherence. Transitions between scenes occurring in Canada and India, or different residences, are abrupt and leave readers without a clear understanding of the context or events taking place.

The introduction of new characters and their actions occurring on different floors or in various locations can be disorienting, making it difficult to follow the narrative coherently.

In terms of grammar and punctuation, while some parts appear well-written, there are occasional errors such as subject-verb agreement issues, exemplified by the misuse of "were" instead of "was."

The use of certain terminology, like "Dadu" or "Bapu," without providing explanations can be confusing for readers unfamiliar with these terms.

The flow of the story lacks a sense of mystery or romance, which may leave readers longing for more depth and explanation. The writing tends to lean toward exaggerated drama, with characters reacting in comical ways rather than offering substantial insights.

For instance, Radhika Barve's sudden outburst following meek dialogue creates inconsistency, while Pradeep's lines lack logical coherence. If a father is aware of the family's mistreatment of someone, it is unlikely he would willingly marry his daughter into such circumstances.

While fiction allows for creative storytelling, it is important to establish a plot or story structure that captivates readers and encourages them to continue reading.

I would recommend considering a complete overhaul of the plot, along with the inclusion of scenes that demonstrate this is not a book solely focused on forced marriages within families.

Additionally, character refinement is necessary, as the current portrayals tend to be one-dimensional, either overly meek or inexplicably mean-spirited, often without sufficient justification. Effective character development would greatly enhance the overall reading experience.

Moreover, providing more descriptions of events and surroundings would create a more immersive and engaging read, as the current lack of detail gives the impression of a rushed and impersonal narrative.

Considering the aforementioned aspects, I would rate this book 1 star out of 5.

Wishing you the best of luck with your future writing endeavours!