TO LOVE A BROKEN MAN

15

"Do I look fat in this dress?" asked Kgomotso, posing in front of the full length mirror.

The waist-trainer Jabu gifted her had Kgomotso snatched within an inch of her life. She was never Victoria Secret-model-thin, which was something she struggled with most of her life but post-baby weight came with its own set of challenges. The stretch marks on her stomach and thighs were hard to look at without wanting to cry.

Anesu looked up from his laptop, admiring her curves and the view of her pear-shaped butt, and blood rushed below his waist at the sight of the keyhole cut out on her cleavage.

"You look beautiful."

He hasn't stopped smiling since he got some yesterday. She wasn't too worried they didn't use a condom because chances of her getting pregnant while breast feeding were slim, according to some blog she once read.

"That's not what I asked you." Kgomotso pursed her lips, crossing her arms over her bosom. She had a good mind to cancel the lunch date with Jabu and Hazel because she didn't feel good in any of her clothes, and that sent her excitement down the drain.

He put his laptop aside and walked up to her. "But I didn't lie, baby, do you know how sexy you are in that dress?"

"Really?" The corner of her lip perked up. Anesu could tell her Wakanda is real and she'd believe him because she was hopelessly in love.

"Yes."

"Even with the stretch marks?" she asked, looking up at him.

He wrapped his arms around her waist and held her close. "Yes, you're still sexy even with the stretch marks because they don't take away from your beauty."

"You just want to get me pregnant again," she said, holding back a smile.

"Because I don't want Nkazimulo to get lonely."

"We'll get him a puppy."

He laughed blissfully, throwing his head back. "Cha, angivumi."

"What's wrong with getting a puppy?"

His carefree smile had her mesmerised.

"I prefer people over dogs," he said, humour lurking in his eyes.

She checked the time and was instantly filled with dread about going out and leaving her baby.

"I think I'll stay home and have lunch with the girls another time."

"Why?" His intent gaze heightened her apprehension.

"Because I look like a bloated elephant, Anesu and I can't help but feel like a bad mother for leaving Rori." Tears stung her eyes.

He tilted her face up and looked into her eyes with a tender expression. "You don't have to neglect yourself to be a good mother, baby. I already know that you're a good mother but I also need you to be a happy mother so there's nothing wrong with putting yourself first sometimes. So call Jabu and let her know you'll be late."

Having a man like Anesu was like winning the jackpot that kind of luck didn't happen to everyone.

"Are you sure you'll manage taking care of Rori without my help?"

There was a smirk on his face as if he didn't want to show that he was offended by her question.

"Yes. I know I have to check the milk's temperature on the back of my hand after warming it and also burp him after feeding. I must have a clean diaper close by when I change him so he doesn't pee all over the place."

"And don't forget to wash your hands before changing his diaper."

"I know."

She sighed, resting her hands on his broad shoulders. "It's not that I don't trust you, I'm just nervous about leaving Rori home for the first time."

"I understand but I got this and you have nothing to worry about."

"Okay. But I'll pump before I leave just in case the milk in the fridge won't be enough until I come back."

"Maybe a quickie will help you relax," he said, squeezing her ass.

"No, Anesu." She got out of his embrace and rushed out of their bedroom, laughing as he chased after her.

She had to shower again because the quickie he promised turned into a long steamy love-making session that had her reciting a fervent prayer after getting her toes curled. She didn't have the time to redo her make-up because pumping was more important than 24hour mascara, but a girl could never go wrong with red lipstick.

The gruelling heatwave was back with a vengeance after a day or two of heavy rainfall and made the slow-paced traffic to Midrand insufferable. The air-con provided little comfort against the hell-bound inferno raging over the city. As much as she enjoyed driving Anesu's car it was time to start shopping for something new because there was still no mention of a push present from him. Listening to her 'uplifting' playlist didn't distract her from thinking about calling Anesu.

Becoming a mother gave Kgomotso a new lease on life because Kamo's death had her in a state of despair she never thought she'd be free from. Rorisang's arrival brought a ray of sunshine and loving her baby came naturally as breathing and it was that unconditional love that mended her broken heart and filled the void eating away at her soul. It was a true testament to a quote she once read: 'You never really know true love until you become a mother.'

A call from ausi Daphne interrupted her thoughts because Kgomotso was about to get an update on how the kitchen renovation was going. She thought the upgrade was necessary since the gifting ceremony would happen in Sharpeville and she wanted to make a good impression, which Kgomotso didn't think was necessary.

"Hello."

"How are you, Manana?"

"I'm fine and how are you and Papa doing?"

It was obvious she was waiting for Kgomotso to ask. "I'll start with me. I'm happy with how the kitchen is coming along and I have no complaints."

"Okay, that's good."

Her drawn-out sigh heightened the suspense, but it wasn't lost to Kgomotso that she was going to add a new project to the list because she dropped subtle hints about getting a new lounge suite in their last conversation.

"I was sweeping the yard this morning and noticed the gate wasn't up to standard. I wasn't going to say anything but since we're getting the kitchen done, I thought it would be a good idea to get a new gate that will set the right tone for the rest of the house."

"How much will a new gate cost?" asked Kgomotso. She didn't mind paying for the kitchen renovation but it seemed like ausi Daphne was going overboard, knowing that she won't say no.

"Your father knows a welder who will do it for R4 500."

"Okay, I'll send the money but in the meantime you can start looking for a new garage door."

"Bathong, Manana, it's like you read my mind because the paint is starting to peel."

She was going to call two days later and mention it.

"The house is going to look good once everything is done."

"You are godsend, Manana. I don't know what we would've done without you." She sniffled.

It was time to change the subject because Kgomotso's hormones were still all over the place and made her easily susceptible to tears.

"Is Papa still obsessed with his chickens?"

"Yes and he's thinking of getting a bigger place, but that's the least of his problems because your uncles called wanting to know why they weren't included in your lobola negotiations."

Kgomotso racked her brain but no-one came to mind because everyone who needed to be present on that day was there. "Which uncles?" Confusion registered in her voice.

"From your mother's side of the family. According to them the negotiations were supposed to have happened at your maternal grandmother's house since your parents never married, and they said we can't continue with the gifting ceremony until that is rectified."

"But Anesu wants it done before Christmas."

"I know," said ausi Daphne, solemnly. "They want to have a meeting with your father."

"When?"

"Over the weekend."

"I won't be surprised if Caroline is behind this." Kgomotso frowned as the mention of her mother conjured up unpleasant memories.

"Have you spoken to her?"

"No."

She had no desire to entertain Caroline at any capacity.

"Do you still keep in touch with Sello?"

"I have nothing to say to that man, he's busy gallivanting with Prudence on extravagant vacations paid for with the money he got from Kamo's life insurance but he hasn't seen Khanya since the funeral."

Ausi Daphne's clap resounded through the phone. "They are still together?"

"Yes and apparently they are engaged."

"Bathong!" Ausi Daphne was in disbelief because Sello's family was against the relationship.

Kgomotso slammed on the brakes as a taxi swerved in front of her without warning and the driver behind her blasted his hooter like he couldn't see the taxi driver was the one at fault.

"Are you driving?"

"Yes. I'm having lunch with Jabu and Hazel." Kgomotso had a feeling she was about to get scolded.

"Is the baby with you?"

"No, I left him home with his father."

"Hai, Kgomotso, I know you consider yourself a modern woman but this is not how things are done. It's early for you to be doing such, you should be home with the baby for at least 3 months."

"But Anesu doesn't mind."

"What does he know?"

Yho. It was time to end this conversation before it got heated.

"I'll call you back later."
**********

EL&N London was aesthetically pleasing with an ensemble of flowers that simply didn't compare to anything she's seen, and the lavish ambiance was a depiction of elegance from top to bottom. The shades of pink weren't overbearing considering it wasn't her favourite colour, after taking in her surroundings she had to agree with the website it was the most Instagrammable café.

Kgomotso spotted Hazel first with a glass of champagne in her hand; the party started without her.

"Hello, ladies." Kgomotso pulled out a chair.

"I feel like I haven't seen you in forever, chommie." Hazel hugged her.

Now that Kgomotso was here she wasn't bothered by what ausi Daphne said.

"I was starting to lose hope," said Jabu.

"Sorry. I had to pump first and I was a little nervous about leaving Rori."

"Let's see some pictures," said Hazel.

"Let's get you something to drink first. Champagne?" Jabu summoned a waiter to their table.

"No, I'll have a mocktail," said Kgomotso after a quick scan of the menu.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. I can't drink alcohol because I'm breastfeeding."

"That's one of the many reasons why I'm not having children." She welcomed a lengthy sip.

Kgomotso took out her phone eager to gush over her baby, she started with the most recent ones taken that morning.

"I wish I could say I see the resemblance between you two," said Hazel.

"I know. I'm hoping our second baby will take after me."

Jabu's gaze shifted to Kgomotso. "You're already planning for baby #2; then you might as well become a stay at home mom."

"Well, it's not like it's going to happen now."

"But I heard from HR that you extended your maternity leave." Hazel's tone was accusatory.

"I was going to talk to you about that."

She hasn't even told Anesu.

"Does it mean you're not coming back to M&D?"

"I will come back eventually."

Kgomotso didn't understand the look in Hazel's eyes but it was unnerving.

"I forbid any business talk at this table because we're here to celebrate Romeo's divorce."

"I need to use the restroom." Hazel excused herself.

She didn't want to fight with Hazel especially over this but she owed her a conversation.

"Are you two going to behave or should I ask her to leave?" asked Jabu.

"We'll be fine, there's no need for her to leave."

Jabu didn't seem convinced but an incoming call needed her attention and Kgomotso was spared from an inquisition.

"I have to take this. Hello."

The handsome waiter came back with her mocktail. Good looks must have been a requirement when the hiring process was conducted because all the servers were easy on the eye.

"But I'm not a criminal lawyer," said Jabu.

Even though Kgomotso couldn't hear what the other person was saying, she could tell it wasn't good news from Jabu's expression.

"No, I don't know any lawyers I can recommend but I'm sure it won't be that hard for you to find one."

Jabu quickly hung up and Kgomotso had to pretend she wasn't listening long enough to get curious.

"Apparently Jessica was arrested for drug possession at O.R Tambo last night." Jabu wasted no time spilling the beans.

If there was justice in this country they'd lock her up and throw away the key so she could be out of Kgomotso's life for good.