TO LOVE A BROKEN MAN

22

                               

Just when he thought he was making progress with his healing journey that damn article knocked him 10 steps back and he found himself drowning in the deep end again. He was tired of being forced to relive the pain of losing Kamo because it hindered him from moving on and finding peace, if that was even possible.
     
The article wasn’t even the worst part, it was the women who flocked to his DMs, talking about being Khanya’s step-mother that had him deactivating his social media accounts because he couldn’t bear the thought of another woman raising his daughter. If it were up to his aunty Sthembile he would’ve remarried after his cleansing ceremony because Khanya needed a mother and she’s always been dead set on replacing Kamo.
     
It was one of those days when he didn’t have the will to get out of bed, and every part of his body felt numb as he stared at the dancing silhouettes cast by the light peeking through the closed curtains. Even lifting his head from the pillow seemed like an insurmountable task he wasn’t prepared for. Death was the only thing on his mind in that moment, he could already see it, the heavens opening up and making way for the blinding light to take him away from this misery.
     
Khanya flashed through his mind; his lifeline saving him from the deep end.
     
He ignored his phone but ran out of patience when the person calling tried for the third time. He didn’t want to talk to nosy reporters or anyone calling with a private number for that matter.
     
“No comment,” he yelled.
     
“Hai, ndoda, calm down. It’s me.”
     
Lwazi sighed, sitting up to rest his head on the headboard. “Ngiyaxolisa. It’s been a long day.”
     
“I know I saw the article, which is why I’m on my way there right now.”
     
“Kodwa nawe, Anesu, why didn’t you call before leaving your house? I’m not in the mood for company today.”
     
“So you want me to turn back, knowing how expensive petrol is.”
     
“It’s not like you can’t afford it,” said Lwazi, drily.
     
“You forget that I’m not Robert Gumede.”
     
Lwazi chuckled at his attempt to sound modest. He wasn’t against having company anymore because it already felt like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders.
     
“You’re not poor either.”
     
That was true but it didn’t mean he liked talking about it.
     
“Get out of bed and take a shower. I’m almost there.”
     
There was a pep in his step when Lwazi got out of bed and made his way to the bathroom, knowing that he had people he could always count on was something he didn’t take for granted.
     
He was feeling fresh and rejuvenated after the soothing shower that was before he saw the missed calls from Nolitha. Ignoring her didn’t stop Nolitha from reaching out, he didn’t want to make the mistake of feeding into her delusion of them ending up together and married. Aunty Sthembile shipped her back to Durban to live with her parents and she didn’t shy away from voicing out her dissatisfaction of being kept away from him in the messages she sent.
     
Seeing that she left a voice mail piqued his interest and he followed the prompts without thinking twice to have a listen.
     
If I have to scorch the whole world to make you see how much I love you then hold on tight, baby, because we’re about to go on a wild ride.
    
Lwazi didn’t have the time to ponder if this meant he had to start sleeping with one eye open because Anesu was already at the gate and he had to get dressed.
     
What was Nolitha up to because he couldn’t shake that nagging feeling lurking in the back of his mind?
     
Anesu let himself in because he didn’t like to be kept waiting but Lwazi liked to think that he was impatient because he didn’t take long getting dressed.
     
“It’s so quiet, are you alone?”
     
“Yes, Khanya is in Durban with aunty Sthembile.”
     
“Remind me to give you the things Kgomotso bought her, I left them in the car.”
     
“Haibo.” Lwazi chuckled. “I’ll soon run out of space if she keeps buying Khanya clothes and toys every month.”
    
“I tried talking to her but she still doesn’t come back empty-handed when she goes to the mall. I noticed the other day that she had bought the same outfit twice for Nkazimulo and said she didn’t remember buying it the first time when I asked her.”
     
“It’s easy to see that she’s an amazing mother.” Lwazi spoke with a hint of melancholy.
     
“She is, I couldn’t have chosen a better partner to do this with.”
     
Lwazi didn’t want Anesu to feel like he couldn’t talk to him about his relationship in order to spare his feelings but this was hard to listen to and the smile on his face was forced.
     
“Ja, that’s true.”
     
“Eish.” Anesu sighed, sensing the mood change. “Ngiyaxolisa. I didn’t mean to—”
     
“It’s fine, ndoda, there’s no reason for you to feel bad.” 
     
“I bought some braaied meat while I was at the car wash,” said Anesu, removing the cling wrap.
     
He was eager to change the subject.
     
Lwazi frowned at the sight of garlic rolls. “No, pap?”
     
“You can cook it if you want it that much.” He got a knife and cut the wors into pieces and washed his hands afterwards.
     
“You could’ve just said no.”
     
“Hlala phansi sidle uyeke ukubheda,”
    
He missed their bromance and was happy that Anesu was able to forgive him so they could rekindle it.
     
“Beer?” asked Lwazi.
     
“I’ll have water.”
     
He got a Heineken and bottled water before joining Anesu to feast.
    
“How are you holding up?”
    
Lwazi licked his fingers after biting into a piece of wors. “On most days I can get away with going through the motions because I have to be present for Khanya but I can’t help feeling like I was robbed. I never thought I’d be a widower before our first anniversary and it sucks because she is the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.”
     
“I hear you.” Anesu nodded solemnly.
     
“If there’s one thing I can tell you, ndoda, cherish every moment with Kgomotso and never take anything for granted because life is no fun when you’re living with regrets.” He rapidly blinked back his tears.
     
“I know nothing anyone says or does will make the pain go away but how do you feel about going away for a while? You can stay at my Fresnaye apartment for as long as you need, I think you’ll enjoy the change of scenery.”
    
He shook his head. “Thanks for the offer but I can’t go cause Cape Town holds too many memories for me.”
     
Anesu sighed, slightly dropping his gaze. “There’s something I need to tell you.”
     
“What is it?”
     
“Just bear in mind that we’ll need to verify this before we can take any action.”
     
“Ngiyakuzwa, ndoda.”
     
“Andrews got a lead on Peteren’s whereabouts.”
     
Lwazi moved to the edge of his seat, the sound of his quickening heartbeat was deafening. “Really? Where’s that bastard?”
     
“Switzerland. But don’t get your hopes up in case it’s a dead end like the other leads we’ve had.”
     
“Can we trust Andrews not to deviate from the plan because we’ve come too far for something to go wrong now?”
     
“Andrews is a stand-up guy. He’ll get the job done unless you’re having second thoughts.”
     
Lwazi vehemently shook his head. “I’m not. Everything must go ahead as planned when we find Petersen.”
     
He took a lengthy sip of his beer as the silence stretched longer than a minute. The possibility of finding Petersen kept the wheels inside his head turning, he’s been waiting for this moment since he found out Petersen was responsible for Kamo’s death.
     
They were staring at each other as an unspoken conversation took place between them, they were not in agreement with what Lwazi wanted but Anesu was prepared to support him anyway. His brows gathered in a frown as Lwazi gulped down every last drop in that bottle.   
     
“Yini?” he asked, putting down the empty beer bottle.
     
“Are you sure about doing this, ndoda, because you’ll have to live with it for the rest of your life.”
     
“Yes, and nothing is going to change my mind.”
     
The sound of Lwazi’s ringtone had him rushing to the living room where he left it charging. Anesu hadn’t even finished the piece of meat he was eating when Lwazi came back looking pale with fright and weak at the knees.
     
“We have to go,” he said with the little energy he could muster.
     
“Why? What’s going on?”
     
“Nolitha took my baby.”
                           ************

     

Lwazi felt helpless because they’ve made no progress finding Nolitha since their arrival 2 hours ago and he was growing impatient. Aunty Sthembile didn’t want them calling the police because she wanted this handled as a family matter, it was probably best not to get law enforcement involved because Lwazi will end up in prison for strangling Nolitha.
     
Aunty Sthembile didn’t think much of it when Nolitha came for a visit because it was something she usually did and even let her take Khanya out to the garden, but Nolitha saw an opportunity to slip out undetected and when aunty Sthembile finally noticed she was nowhere to be found. 

They couldn’t track her car because she left it at her parents’house and her phone has been off since she kidnapped Khanya. They didn’t even know if she was still in the same province, their glimmer of hope was Nolitha using her credit card because they’d already alerted the bank.
     
“Maybe we should pray again.” That was Nomonde, resurfacing with a fresh pot of tea from the kitchen.
     
“How is prayer going to help my child? We don’t know if she’s been fed or had her diaper changed since she was taken.”
     
“Ngicela wehlisa umoya, Lwazi, we’re all just trying to help.”
     
“Then help me find Khanya, aunty, because I can’t sit here and wait, hoping Nolitha will come back to her senses.”
     
“Nolitha won’t hurt Khanya, she’s just going through a tough time and needs us to be more understanding.”
    
“Is that why you let her kidnap my daughter?”
     
“Haibo, Lwazi.” Anger flashed in her eyes like lightning against dark clouds looming in the sky.
     
“Take a beat before you say something else you are going to regret,” said Anesu. He had to keep a cool head because the situation was already tense and he’s been putting out fires since they arrived and didn’t get a chance to call Kgomotso.
     
Speaking of Kgomotso her name appeared on his screen and he stepped outside to take the call because he had some explaining to do.
     
“Baby?”
     
“Hi, are you still with Lwazi?”
     
“Yes,” he said hesitantly.
     
“Okay, so when should we expect you home because I’m about to give Rori a bath and you know he’ll fall asleep soon after.”
     
“I won’t be able to come home tonight because I’m in Durban.”
     
She must have heard wrong because there was no way this man would go to another province and not tell her, clearly he doesn’t value his life.
     
“What are you doing in Durban?”
     
“Nolitha took Khanya.”
     
“As in kidnapped her?”
     
The shouting startled Rori and he started wailing while his tiny hands balled into fists.
     
“Baby, please calm down.”
     
“Hey! Don’t tell me to calm down, Anesu, you’re in another province because my niece was kidnapped and you’re only telling me now.”
     
“I’m sorry, baby.”
     
Yeses! Bloody fool.
     
“You better hope and pray she’s found safe and sound or else don’t bother coming back. I mean it.”