𝘽𝙄𝙏𝙏𝙀𝙍, max verstappen

chapter twenty-nine.

camila was certain that spending a month rotting in misery was going to drive her insane.

winter break had served most of its purpose as moments of reflection — reflection over the whole whirlwind of a year camila had just been through.

from the highs of winning, to the lows of loosing, camila had finally managed to accept something.

she was no longer a reflection of her father, in fact, she never was.

the video of hugo after the race had sent the media into a frenzy. a three time world champion, highly respected amongst the grid, had now become hated by so many people, yet he had also given the world so many explanations — explanations as to why camila had gone crashing into a downward spiral once her results grew worse over the season, explanations as to why she'd always avoid her father in the paddock, explanations as to why she'd taken up smoking again, explanations as to why she wore long sleeves so frequently.

the fia had taken up an investigation towards hugo. now, he was banned from coming to the paddock.

with all the news in the media, camila also had to get her own lawyers involved after receiving countless threatening calls and messages from her father; she had now gotten a restraining order against him — and that managed to ease the heaviest weight off her shoulder.

lewis was proud of her. camila was proud of herself. this was the first step — she was going to make things right.

so, she started going to therapy. although hesitant at first, thanks to lewis' encouragement, camila finally met someone that she could open up to.

going to therapy had made camila realise so many things, it was starting to help her deal with problems she had tried so desperately to ignore; her anger, her grief, her self-criticism. she was finally starting to feel better about things — she wanted to make herself feel better about things. she wanted people to notice she was getting better.

speaking all her bottled up feelings into existence had proven much more challenging than camila had anticipated. from the loss of her mother when she was only young, to the fear and abuse her father had put her through immediately after, then dealing with the whirlwind that was the 2021 season, camila had found herself breaking down throughout many sessions with her therapist.

yet sofia had always managed to be patient with camila — she always hated being vulnerable, but after countless sessions of therapy, it was slowly beginning to become more and more easier for her.

winter break was almost over by the time camila had finally begun to feel as though sofia knew everything. every last detail of what had happened, what camila had been bottling up. most things she'd kept to herself, the ones she'd been refusing to share, had finally been spoken.

she'd always tried to avoid talking about her and max, yet once she finally told sofia what had happened between them, guilt took over her body.

what if she'd never pushed max away? what if it wasn't really for the better? would she be happier now, if she'd let max in, if she stopped pushing him away?

when camila had told sofia about this, one question she'd asked camila lingered for far too long.

"was pushing max away really for the best if it was so difficult for you to do?"

she couldn't stop thinking about it.

she couldn't stop thinking about him, she couldn't stop thinking about if her and max were really wrong for one another.

nobody had ever consumed camila in the way max had — the way max still did.

but camila knew she should follow sofia's advice — you need to heal before you consume yourself in someone.