Since the day I met you

|22| Progress

"You're awfully cheerful today", My mother notices

"Me?"

"Who else?"

"Can't a girl just fold laundry with her mom?", I reply innocently

"Mhm, sure"

I smile a little as I fold one of Neveah's shirts, "Ok I'm really happy"

"I can tell, you've been smiling since the second you got in here. It's cute"

"Really? That much"

"Yup"

Xavier really wanted to watch the basketball game with my dad so I freed him from my presence, it's fine I'll hang with him before we go to sleep.

"What was it like with you and daddy?"

She pauses from folding, smiling as she thinks about it. "Your father was so handsome back in his twenties, and he was always straight up with what he wanted. None of that bullshit, that's what I loved about him. And he'd do absolutely anything to protect me"

I snort, "So why did you reject him for so long?"

"Cause he had such a big ego"

"Ma I'm serious"

"Well that's definitely true. But not only that there was just too much shit going on and I couldn't make space for love in my life, I didn't think I deserved it"

My face softens, "Of course you do"

"I know that now, but eighteen year old me didn't"

I sigh, "I think Zay's the same"

She tilts her head, "With what?"

"The whole love thing, I mean we say it but I don't think that he thinks he deserves it either. Especially with how aunt Toya is towards him"

Mom nods slowly, "I hear you. Darnel told me about the Trinidad thing"

"I think it's snakey-

She raises a hand "To be honest, and I know you're gonna hate me for saying this, I can see where Toya is coming from"

I frown, "What?"

"Well I don't think the whole sending the kids back home thing is a wild idea I just think that you need to have the right reasons"

"Sending your child away because they're not good enough or they're not what you signed up for isn't a good reason"

"Yes and I agree with you on that part. I think Xavier just needs a little time to figure out what he wants to do, school ain't for everyone"

"Mama can I ask you something", I suddenly say

She sits back whilst holding her stomach, "Yeah what is it"

I don't reply for a moment as I think of how to word my question. "How did-.... I mean when did grandma call the cops about....-

"My dad?"

"Yeah"

"Well, when she found out about the baby. I suppose that was her breaking point"

Mom's first boyfriend got her pregnant when she was seventeen and her dad beat her until it was dead, he was extremely abusive. She never deserved any of it, my mom's the sweetest person on this planet, hearing about her childhood just breaks my heart sometimes. I love her so much.

I don't reply to her comment, being too deep in thought. But she notices my silence, "Is there something you know?"

"No"