- What if 𝙉atalia can't
accept getting things
thrown at her anymore?
ᶜˡᵃʸ ʲᵉⁿˢᵉⁿ
𝙉atalia 𝘽exley was an ordinary girl. Her grades were good and she had good friends. The girl had never experienced anything b...
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GRIEF. IT WAS such a strange thing. Everyone experienced it differently, and there was no way of telling if you were doing it in the way you were supposed to because when it hit, it could knock you off of your feet. Natalia knew this. After her grandma, after Jeff, after Hannah, and strangely even after Bryce and Monty, she felt grief wash over her at random times.
It was always the thought of what could've been that triggered the tears and anger. What could've been of her life if her grandma had still been there to guide her? What could've been if she still had Jeff to give her his lifesaving advice? What could've been if Hannah were there to experience the rest of her life with her imperfect best friend? What if Bryce was never killed? What if Monty had still been there?
She didn't miss Bryce or Monty in any sense. They've made Natalia's life hell on earth multiple times, yet she still felt they deserved a shot a life too. It made Natalia mad when she knew that she'd been a factor in their deaths. It was enough she had to live her life out carrying the guilt, but she'd have to bear the secret of Bryce's murder.
There was a lot that happened in Natalia's highschool years and all of it, despite how unfortunate the majority of it was, had been a lesson.
Now, Natalia wasn't an idiot. She was never perfect, she didn't deserve much. She'd been a lot of things, but a bad person? She wasn't a bad person. She was just misunderstood. The handful of people that got her were just as troubled as her. Maybe, this is where she belonged in life as fucked as that is.
However, did she deserve for her friends to suffer? She didn't think she deserved that, or the friends in question.
It's been a week since prom. Justin has been in the hospital ever since he collapsed on the dance floor. Natalia had clung to Clay's side the whole time, and visited Justin as much as she was permitted to.
Natalia felt discombobulated. This couldn't happen again. Right? Her emotions were all over the place. All she could do is help. In any way she could. Clay had confided in her about his current state.
It was no surprise that he was under distress. He was confused, and Natalia knew that she could only control how she could help him, not his emotions.
It's been a struggle.
She fiddled with her ring in the waiting room. Clay had went to tell Justin he had visitors. Jessica had come out, she looked strong. It had been hard for Natalia to stomach all of it. Alex and Charlie went in.
•••
IT BEGAN TO change into the later afternoon when Clay told her she could see him. It wasn't long after Charlie and Alex went in, she got to see him again. The sun draped over the room beautifully. She smiled at Justin when she walked in. He had the little chameleon stuffed animal she'd got him tucked into his side.
