Chris: Last time on Total Drama World Tour... Alberta! It'll blow you away! How could this happen?! Well first, Scott exploded when Jo called Cody a two-timer. So, he took it out on Heather and ka-boom! Someone got stuck in a hole. Luckily for Heather, Jo felt a tremor in her tiny black heart and saved her. But... her heart imploded when she found out Heather voted for her. She would have been a goner. Except Scott demolished my plane! Did I mention we've got no ride now? Hmm? BECAUSE SCOTT BLEW IT UP?! [inhales into a paper bag] Our final three are jetting to Hawaii... without a jet. So get set for some other kind of race to the million! Right here on Total. Drama. World Tour! [front part of the plane fell on the ground] Ouch!
*Cue the theme!*
Chris: The hot tub with my name spelled out in Italian tiles, gone. My monogrammed sneakers, gone. My custom calibrated stubble trimmer, gone.
Jo: So... shall we continue the game?
Heather: Yeah. I second that, totally.
Chris: As usual, you two are thinking of nothing but yourselves.
[Confessional: Jo]
Jo: Reminds me of something I read. You see, in the movie novel, half of Slappy's face gets burnt... I didn't care because I think the movie novel sucks a lot.
[End confessional]
Cody: [grunts] Can we get some help over here?
Chris: What about the bigger humanitarian crisis? How am I supposed to keep this face fresh without my hyperbolic chamber?
[Cody picks up a bald Scott who was left from the plane explosion]
Scott: Oh, Cody. I've had dreams like this! Except in most of them, you wore a Mountie hat and a loincloth. [purrs]
Cody: Did you land on your head?
Scott: No, silly! I'm fine. I'm fantastic! Except for my, you know, my left wrist, right earlobe, scalp and both ankles. [Cody struggles to hold her up] Which, um, are kind of throbbing with every step we take. Ow! Ow!
Cody: [as he and Scott fall] Whuh-oh!
Heather: [in the destroyed confessional] Now that Scott's out of the game, it would be nice to earn points with Cody. But really, I have to help. I've been where he is. Crazy or not, no person should ever have to be bald on national TV. Here. Maybe these will help. [she gives Scott a wheelchair and a head-dress up cover up his bald head]
Scott: Does it look okay?
Heather: Gorgeous!
[Chef comes out with the emergency kit]
Chris: Hey! My emergency kit! We're saved! Ha ha! That's right, kids. Get ready for surf, sun, and beauties in grass skirts. We're going to a-Hawaii!
[Jo, Heather, and Cody cheer]
Chris: I know. Best host ever. Never doubt me!
[the box collapsed revealing a helicopter]
Jo: Uh, is that a two seater?
Chris: Yep. Chef flies, I supervise.
Jo: And we?
Chris: Will be competing to get to the big island first using only your wits and whatever you find out here.
Cody: But we're in the middle of nowhere!
Chris: True. So, check these fancy-dancy GPS's I'm generously giving you.
Heather: "Middle of Nowhere, Alberta." Well, they work.
Chris: Set 'em for Tijuana Beach. It's right on the Mexican border. Now move it! Go, go, go!
Scott: Wait! What about me?!
Chris: Make like you took the Drop of Shame and figure it out yourself!
Scott: [in the destroyed confessional, furious about Chris abandoning him in Drumheller] Okay, pappy. I know how hard it is to end a crush but he's a total jerkface! When I come home, the Chris McLean museum/guestroom better be destroyed!
Chris: Don't worry! You're all totally gonna make it! [he and Chef leave by riding a helicopter]
if heather could find something useful
in there maybe i can too
you can do it can i come watch i'm not
busy
okay
Heather: And this must be the part where you ask me to join forces.
Jo: Why would I do that?
Heather: Because we're the final two, right? It was like a pact. You wanted--
Jo: I know what you did.
Heather: Um, could you be a bit more specific? I've done a lot. [gasps]
Jo: [takes out her passport revealing that Heather tried to vote her out of the game; angrily] YOU VOTED FOR ME! [normal] Oh, prepare for the full force of Hurricane Jo. Next stop, Hawaii. And I sincerely hope you don't make it.
Heather: Oh, like you wouldn't do the same!
Jo: [in the destroyed confessional] Heather has a way of making my focus slip, like a too-small Speedo. This race is my redemption. As long as I travel alone, she can't distract me with her clever words, or her distrustful eyes, or the way she tucks her hair behind those cute little earlobes...argh! Focus!
Heather: You better focus, 'cause it is on! I am gonna smoke you for breakfast!
Jo: Bring it!
Heather: [over walkie talkie] Blah blah blah. Guess what? I can just turn you off.
Jo: [over walkie talkie] Of course you can. You're an expert at turning people off.
Heather: Ugh! Much better. Without Miss Evil around to distract me, I am going straight to Millionaire City, population: me. Okay, now how do I get there?
YOU ARE READING
Let's Discover the World Together
FanfictionFifteen members of the Total Drama Island cast are joined by two new competitors for a tour around the world. But these two new people are not the ones you remember... because they have changed. How will Jo and Scott affect things?
