You are the new girl in town and you bump into two curious men, one is a hot horse gangster and the other is a petite, cute, cinnamon roll! What are you gonna do, as wacky situations leave you desperately in love with the two boys, along the way you...
Shortly after the bus driver (who just killed my best friend in the world - Zoe Dechanel or . . . should I say zombie deschanel because she is dead), steps out of the school bus and reveals themselves to be . . . Louis Griffin the School Principal?
"Sshtudens!! Get Inside !" (Australian Accent) and at that moment a bunch of mimes appear from around the school- peeking out of bushes and opening invisible doors. They appear all over - like pimples surfacing in the face of a 14 year old boy. And some of them have invisible weapons! Oh no!
Without thinking I turn around and start running towards the safety of the inside of the school but just as I think I'm in the clear I trip over something scary. I fall flat on my perfect face and 10 mimes start running towards me. They know that at this moment I am weak. Just as I think it's all over for me and get ready to leave this mortal realm behind - bojack swoops in and grabs me with his talons by the hair and drags me into the school slamming and barricading the door behind him.
"T-thank you bojack...you saved my life!" I say totally falling in love with him again.
"Don't mention it" and at that - he struts off swaying his hips.
There are still a few students outside but they can't get in because bojack barricaded the door. I got kinda bored hearing them die outside so I head to the cafetiera - where Louis griffin is alreday trying to heard students to listen to her. The whole place has this kinda apocalyptic vibe and it's so eerie and dark that the only thing i can clearly make out is micheal pale face.
I watch as michael's eyes meets bojacks and he scurries over to his stern horse figure. Micheal holds onto bojacks hands and looks the whole 2 foot hight gap upwards.
"B-b-bojack! Uhh Whats - Whats going on??"
"Well it's here. The mime pocolpis." Responds bojack
"Whats ? Whats the Mime popolips" says michael
And at that Guy Fieri saunters over
"You don't know what the Mime Pocolips is??"
And he gets up on the cafeteria table and gets the attention of the survivors to tell them about the mime pocolips.
" Alright people, for those of you who don't know it all started when some scientists were doing science experiments and created this unique DNA structure - they called it the mimes. After years of being tested on, the mimes fought back and viciously attacked the innocent scientists and escaped into the human world. They have been lurking and waiting for the old proverb to come true and for the right moment to strike back at humanity." Says guy fieri
"So then mr ferrai - whats the old proverb?" I ask badassly, kinda interested if this is gonna be the end of the world.
"Well Y/N, the old proverb states 'the first drip of mime blood spilt on radiator springs soil will bring about the mime pocolips where the mimes will reclaim the land of man as foretold' it also says that 'a fierce young girl who once befriended a mime - will lead the strongest army in defeating the mimes.' , I don't really know what that means but it was in the prophecy."
"But. Dude. How do we know who is a mime and who isn't? thats totally dumb" Says bojack, meanly.
"Well, It's pretty easy actually." Guy fieri pull out an a4 printed photo that looks like this.
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"THIS is a mime! you can tell from the striped shirt" Says guy ferrari
I GASP realising that this is a photo of my ex-best friend zoe dechanel (ex best bc shes dead), and it all starts to click together. I turn to louis griffin who is also standing on a cafeteria table. "Is . . Is that why you hit her with a bus?"
"Yeah" Says louis - staring intently at Guy Ferrari. Someones got a crush...
"You can tell that this one is only in the early stages of mime development - first comes the stripy shirts then as they level up as a mime they start wearing pale makeup with black lips and scary eyebrows. When they are at this stage looking at them for too long will turn you into stone!" The whole body of people gasp. "The highest level mime in mime society will wear a french hat, this kind of mime must be avoided at all costs"
Micheal cera begins to sob uncontrollably.
I take a moment to look around - see who I might be spending my potential last days alive with. There's bojack who's sitting down consoling michael, Mr Peanutbutter is breakdancing and entertaining Dan and Phil who seem upset by the end of days but are enjoying the performance. Louis Griffin and Guy Ferrari are still standing on the cafeteria tables but consoling Bo Burnam who is upset because Phoebe Bridgers was taken by the mimes. Jack Septiceye and Markilpler are chatting with Stanelle, and my now former classmates Tweek and Craig are scheming on a piece of paper how to kill the mimes. Both the guys from the hit 2014 movie "Creep" are creeping around and checking for any unnoticed mimes, with the help of young Seth Rogan and old Jonah Hill. I notice that Danyella Lana's son is in the room talking to Rhett and Link - They seem to be convincing him to try deep fried mime meat. Then I hear from right behind me, scarily close.
"Hey Baybeh - Baybeh Elvis - What'ya think of all this mime nonsense?" (elvis voice)
"Whell Baybeh Old Fat Elvis - I'm quite frightened is all" (also elvis voice)
"It's okay Baybeh, I'll protect you" and the two Elvises kiss. I don't see it but I can hear it. God I have to get away from all of this. Joan of Arc and the Beatles are talking while Jhonathan Van Ness and Mark Peacock (from queer eye) are helping Former President JFK and Lem Billing to Barricade the doors some more. "I Er uhmm . . . Need more benches . . for this window . . . I am scared that the mimes will get in" . Silly John F Kennedy - he thinks the mines can climb? Just as I finish that thought, Famous Actor Amy Shumer crawls in the window . . . Wearing a stripy shirt!
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And she thinks that the wind is blowing and she is getting knocked over by it! Silly Amy ! there is no wind we are inside! Bo Burnham doesn't think that's very funny because he immediately whips out a 1988 .38 Special Revolver (the same gun Jhon Lennon was assassinated with) and shoots her 5 times. She is dead. There are mime juices everywhere.
"I've decided." Bo Burnham begins in his twinkish voice. "I'm starting my own cult. Too many of you are weak and will only drag our chances of survival down. I will take the strongest alphas of the group" he proceeds to choose: Mr Peanutbutter, George Harrison and John Lennon, Danyella Lanas son, Mark Peacock, Stanelle, Old Jonah Hill and Baby Elvis, Joan of Arc and . . . Little old me. But before I can voice my shock, Joan of Arc stands on a table (what a pick me lmao)
"I have something to reveal !" Everyone turns to look at Joan of Arc as she rips off her wig and reveals the exact same haircut underneath "IT'S ME ! BEN GIBBARD!!" Shocked by the reveal that our dear friend and companion was not who she said she was. To lie about such a thing changes Bo Burnham's mind completely and he uninvites her from his cult. Sadly Ben Gibbard steps down from the table. "I will probably write an album about this."
And with that the chosen one's begin to file out of the room - but I'm not so convinced, I don't want to leave all these great people. And one thing that truly makes my decision...will be revealed in the next chapter. KEEP READING TO FIND OUT!
