secrets i've kept hidden (a poetry story)

i will wait

i wanted to write about you again,
but i just didn't know how to get the words out

till now

there was something about you i never saw coming,

this boy,
he kinda has it all,
he's really handsome

i carry secrets,
but i wanted to wait to tell him

it's killing me,
cause i want him to know

but,
i don't know if i can trust him,
just yet

i hope one day i will

one day,
i hope things will be different,

i will wait for you to like me,

if you ever felt a little something for me

because i did,

the stars align,
the moon is bright

your kiss sends butterflies down my stomach,

i don't get nervous,
but i get nervous about you,

i miss when you would touch me,
and play with my hair

i miss the euphoria i would feel when we'd kiss

we are two different people,
and that's okay

i guess we had different motives
and feelings for each other

and that is okay too,
i still stand by what i say

and what i believe it

baby,
you brought me back to myself when apart of me died when i was seventeen

i hope this distance will make me realize,

if it was worth it,
or
i will move on

you meet people for a reason,
and i know i met you for a reason

i day dream when i sit beside you,

it's like i painted what i wanted,
when maybe,
that isn't who you are

i didn't think you'd understand me,
and i don't think you do

my overthinking,
why are fading?

but i will let it happen,

i deserve the world

me and my mind tried to figure it out,
but it seemed like abandonment was a big part of my childhood

maybe this doesn't mean anything,

or maybe the future will unfold everything

i will wait,
but only for a little awhile

you made me happy,
i don't wanna let that go

but apart of me wants too,

cause why wait around for someone who isn't sure about me?

i miss you,
but i will never tell you