secrets i've kept hidden (a poetry story)

parts of me died

i would say that i am not who i was before,
not who i used to be,

i can't even put it into words,
but i feel like something is missing

something i had before,
is gone

i have holes in my body
from your words that felt like bullets rushing through my body

one part of me died the day you left,

another part of me died when esha came in the picture

and another part died and i realized there's no coming back from this

the only person i ever needed back was myself
but i don't think she's there anymore

there's still parts of me that are dying,
i'm just too numb to feel it anymore

you're gone,
you don't love me anymore

you sucked the life out of me and went on
i'm trying to find the stiches and needles to sew me back

but i will never be the same

it's like breaking a glass,
you glue it back,
but you can tell it's been broken

you see the lines from the cracks that were made in the glass

parts of me died,
but you will never bring them back to life