Exposing Her Heart

24🖤. Reminiscing

Xave's POV:

Zhara saying that I'm not a monster and that I was smart and fun to be around really made me emotional deep down. I needed that

But she doesn't know

She increases my drive to change so tremendously yet have no clue

This makes me think about how a person may mean everything to another and they have no clue

Like, you could be a persons whole reason for living and you're just there existing not knowing how much you mean to that person and how much you do for them simply by just being genuine

Growing up even though we had everything we could ever want it wasn't a happy home.

My dad was never home and my mother was a depressed woman drowning in self pity

I tried to make my siblings grow up in a different environment but it made me realize that I didn't really get to enjoy my childhood because I was busy playing parent from a young age

We were watching tv with Zhara leaning on me as I leaned on the head board

"I had an older brother" I said lowly

"Had?" She asked

"Yeah, he died"

"How? If you don't wanna talk about it it's fine"

"Dat gov mn, when we did deh ina primary school him drop out, he would've been 30 in January. He was in grade 6 and I was in grade 4" I paused

She slowly began drawing circles on my arm

"He got caught up in some things involving my father, yk how dat go, cyah ketch the man yu ketch summo him love, somebody important to him. Growing up I wasn't really looked at to take over, my brother was more fit for the position I was more of a nerd" I chuckled

"My nerd" she smiled

"I was the brains yk and he was the street smart one, mi protector, being smart and small doesn't get me friends but bullies..... but my brother, he'd always fight for me."

It's crazy how I was a skinny piece a summo n I look way different now

"Just wanted to start a business and work a regular job, never really go the way I planned but at least I got the businesses. Anyways after they found his body mi just change. It was just me and him until my sister came into the picture and then after he died my other brothers came along"

We both stayed quiet

"I'm sorry all that happened especially since you both were children and probably had no idea what your father was involved in. I'm sorry that it happened to your brother and caused some significant changes in your life but I'm happy you didn't get caught in it and we actually got a chance to meet even though you weren't making some good impressions at times" she finished smiling

"You're strong, all the pressure fell on you and you didn't give up, you kept going."

She pecked my cheeks

"I'm proud of you, you didn't give up",

She said then kissed me

Here she goes once again, healing me without a clue

Breaking the kiss she started talking about her family

"My dad was the best, he died though. He had cancer" her eyes got teary

"I remember all the times he'd trick me, telling me to go change my clothes and he'd wait for me to go on the road and when mi reach back he'd be long gone, I fell for it every single time" we both chuckled