25th March, 2024
i am writing again, and it feels so incredibly good to get rid of all those words and images that are clogging my brain. they have been tumultuously rioting to get their freedom, for days now.
i can't sleep still, and my health is pretty poor, but at least i can leave this behind. legacy is a very strong word, as i am aware it's all low-quality fiction, but still. maybe some people will still remember me when i'm gone?
a silly way to justify one's existence, i know. but what can i say, i am vain sometimes.
otherwise, we'll all just have to admit that... all our existence is quite pointless. futile. we are a cancer on the face of the Earth, vermin to be rid of.
and it's coming. it's been a downhill curve, for a while now. this civilization is coming to an end, the center cannot hold. all the great things, discoveries, initiatives are drowned by destruction and pollution and austerity and war.
i am still not too sure if it's a matter of prophecy, or maybe just cold logic.
humankind is at the end of its tether. woe be on you, if you have children. woe be on all children of the world too. they will be the ones to witness the greatest of all sorrows.
but no one cares. people call me deranged when i speak of this. so i don't any more. everyone has the right to suicide.
i rather write, and hope. maybe i can save a soul, or two.
maybe my life won't be pointless, in the end.
