Embracing My Shepherd [COMPLETED]

Chapter 10

Maybe someday...

Does he really think that it's that easy? Did he really thought I would tell him what's bothering me? Not that I don't want to let him know... it's just that... I couldn't find the right words to tell him everything... and I'm not really ready for him to know everything about me.

It's been a week since that happened and here I am in front of my friends along with them is felix and maivann watching me- waiting for my answer.

They invited me for miu's birthday party tomorrow... and I want to go.. I really do but... My mother wouldn't allow me to...

Slowly I shook my head. I could feel their unbelievable stares so I decided to just bow my head because of shame.

"It's fine, rei. I understand."  Miu smiled at me and hugged me. Yumakap na din si rain kaya napangiti ako at humingi nang pasensya bago sila niyakap pabalik.

"I'm sorry." I whispered.

They sadly nod and waved goodbye at me. Felix didn't look at me at tumalikod na lang din upang sumunod kila rain. Maivann was the only one left. I didn't look at him and turned my back, I was about to walk away when he suddenly talked.

"It's your friend's birthday, You couldn't even stop avoiding us first?" I froze because of the coldness in his voice.

I bit my lips before looking at him.

"What's it with you? Sa kanila nga ayos lang." I raised my eyebrows and crossed my arms.

"That's your friend."

"Alam ko. Kaya nga ako nag sorry. They understood that I couldn't attend the party, so what's your problem?" My forehead knot.

"Seriously? Kahit man lang saglit hindi ka sisipot? Why? Did we offend you or something?" He asked frustrated this time.

Why is he even frustrated? Ano naman sa kaniya? I don't get him really! Miu and rain said that it's fine so what's his problem?!

"Now you're annoyed?!" I couldn't help but to raise my voice because of the changes in his tone. "The only person that's allowed to be annoyed here is me! Bakit ba! Ano bang pakealam mo kung hindi ako pwedeng pumunta sa party niya?! It's not like I hold my own fvcking decision! At pwede ba?! Huwag ka ngang maki-alam!" I exploded.

"Wala ka namang alam eh! MIND YOUR OWN FVCKING BUSINESS! Mag solve ka na lang nang mathematical equations tutal doon ka naman magaling diba?!" I yelled.

Naka uwi na sana ako! But here I am arguing with him about sime silly thing! Ano bang ipinaglalabam niya? Really?

Hindi na siya sumagot at tinalikuran ako bago nag lakad paalis. I stood unmoving as I watch him walk away from me. Just like that it made me realize how true my mother's word was... no one would really stay. 

No one is strong enough to stay with me through my ups and downs, because who am I in the first place? I'm not someone special to them... to him..

Days passed until it was already our exam. And because of what happened between me and maivann I could observed how me and my friends grow apart each other.

Isn't that what I like? They're slipping away from me, they won't be burned by my flames now... they wouldn't get hurt.

I'm fine getting hurt as long as they'll be safe. Kahit kapalit pa noon ay buhay ko...