Writing with a Purpose: Summer Edition

19. 6/30/15

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Today shall be a bit of a rant! Mostly because of my mother who has decided to become a judgmental religious woman. Just like 95% of all Christians. I really don't care if you're a die hard Christian, that's cool if you're religious, BUT practice what you preach. LOVE THY NEIGHBOR BITCH! DON'T JUDGE, ETC. I know this will probably get a lot of comments maybe just because people will want to attack and counteract what I say, I'm prepared to not give a fuck.

Ok, now to continue on with my story. So my mom comes home from work, everything is fine or whatever. We don't really talk cause she's upset that I don't "I have a terrible attitude and want respect but don't give it," also because I don't bow to my father's feet even though he disrespects me 24/7, I should give him 100% respect simply because he is my father. Just doesn't seem to add up to me. Anyway, I came out from my room to feed myself without saying a word. My mom took this opportunity to randomly tell me "Leila, you know that being gay in the Bible is an abomination."

Now let's just take a moment to process this moment. My mother knows that I am Bisexual, yes if you weren't aware, I am. She doesn't like it but says that "it is what it is" right? Right. Ok now why was that comment necessary? I don't recall asking? Quite frankly I don't care. What made her want to tell me that being gay, knowing I'm gay, is an abomination? Is she trying to tell me that I'm an abomination? Clearly. I know that to my mother, I am her fucked up kid. She uses me and all that I am for things she will do different with my siblings. Since I am "very unholy and enjoy living the life of sin," she is using the advantage of the kids being young and their minds being easily molded to drill religion as much as she can into their tiny, impressionable minds so they can be different from me.

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So I then say "I guess I'm an abomination." What else am I supposed to? Drop to the floor and repent for my sinful, gay thoughts? Am I supposed to apologize for something out of my control? Well, I won't. Also, every time I defend myself or say any kind of defensive comment about being gay, it's considered "having attitude" or being "disrespectful." I really don't know what she expects me to do. The Bible cannot "un-gay" someone, no amount of religion can un-gay someone. Hate to break it to you.

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She then replies "You cannot accept it, you have to pray for it. You cannot accept it." At that point, I silenced myself. I have no time to waste arguing for myself. I do not care to argue with her. It will not change anything. I know that if I argue back, she will just get mad and try to punish me.

I was so mad though, and I still am. Being that I was so upset, I decided to research what the Bible really says about gay people, so the next time my mom tries my life, I can religiously slay her with facts.

| 10:15 AM
I dont think I've ever researched so hard in my life but it was definitely worth it. I emerged from my room around 9:17 and I started off by saying this "Mom, I would like the discuss the Bible with you," in which she replied "I would love that." We began to playful ready for our discussion and I stated "Im glad because I'm about to religiously slay you with facts." So we sat down at the dinner table and I read from the articles in which I had reread twice at least to make sure I completely understood all I was about to say. I had to ready myself for some debating, but also educating. My mom has some questions in which she tried to put down what I said, so I would explain to her whatever she questioned. My mom explained to me that she is in the "middle," meaning that she sometimes leads towards the "all gay shall burn in hell" and other times she leads towards "as long as they do everything properly and love one another, it's okay." She bases her beliefs off what long-time Christians have interpreted which isn't always correct. The Bible is something you need to experience yourself and interpret it on your own to fully grasp what it's really saying.

Anyway, I did my part. I taught her something that someone who she says "doesn't believe" (I do believe, I'm just not a wannabe holy person).

Super happy that Gay Marriage was legalized nationwide on June 26, 2015 (Brenon and I made 2 months that same day)!! That was, I know, a great moment in history for all of the gays, lesbians, bisexuals, etc. out there! So happy we can finally love freely. It was so cute seeing all the proposals on snapchat the day they legalized it. #Lovewins !!

I'm going to include the articles that I used so you guys can check it out for yourself //

http://www.notalllikethat.org/taking-god-at-his-word-the-bible-and-homosexuality/

http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/990444