Writing with a Purpose: Summer Edition

20. 7/1/15

I WANTED TO ALSO MENTION THAT BABY'S BIRTHDAY PASSED AND I DIDN'T WRITE THAT DAY BUT HIS BIRTHDAY WAS THE 29th! SEND OUT SOME LATE HAPPY BIRTHDAYS!

| It's 1:16 in the morning.

Brenon is asleep, but as always, I'm awake at all times of the night. Honestly, I think it may be affecting my body, being since I don't get enough sleep. Sleeping early seems like a waste though. I like to enjoy the time I have for myself. I like the silence and the fact that everyone is asleep. I don't get this until this time because I'm always with the kids, and it gets worse once my parents arrive. It's just so peaceful.

I think the main reason I started these entries is just to let some things out. It helps me express myself and to keep me busy. Also, to have fun. I like writing for the most part. A lot of people don't know but I started actually journaling since 5th grade. I have probably 6 or 7 journals. I keep them hidden in my room. I always told myself I would publish them into a book, I figured Watt Pad would be my first step so here I am. Of course I didn't start from 5th grade cause who wants to read that far back anyway.

I really would like to write a book though. Fiction is my favorite. It gives you an opportunity to explore your imagination. I love how even though there's no pictures, when you read, you can see everything in your head. It's like you imagine it how you see it and their words are the guides for the illustration. I love that.

In other news, I didn't get to spend Brenon's birthday with him because his family had to go to Tennessee for a family emergency. His older brother broke his leg pretty bad during football practice. It kind of sucked, I felt bad for Brenon because I know that personally I would hate for my birthday to end up being about someone else. Maybe that's just cause I'm pretty selfish but I happen to think birthdays are important. You never know when your last birthday will be, so I think they should all be special.

What sucks the most is I might have to wait a whole other week to see him because his family decided to stay longer since Devon was having surgery. I wish Brenon and I lived closer. It's not like he lives hours away, it's only 30 minutes, but it feels farther. Especially since I normally have to wait till Saturdays to see him. Although Brenon had to spend most of his birthday in a hotel room and hospital waiting area, his mom promised to make it up to him "even if it means picking Leila up every day afterwork." Shit, I wish I could see him everyday. The only sweet thing about us having to wait, is that each time it's so exciting to see each other again since we've been apart for a while.

| 9:42 PM RANT RANT RANT

This is why I do not get along with my father. Ok, so right now I'm at Barnes and Nobles, which normally I would be very happy to be here. Not today. I am so upset.

Before my father came home, I asked my mother to take me to the Walgreens. JUST WALGREENS. So I could buy myself a charger since my charger has an annoying short. My dad then arrives just when I'm leaving to walk the dogs in the pouring rain. Lovely.

So while I'm gone, I'm assuming my father got to yapping his mouth about going to Barnes and Noble. When I finally walk into the house, everyone is getting dressed for I don't know what. As time goes on, I'm becoming aggravated within myself because I can just sense that we are going somewhere other than Barnes and Noble. When I'm finally informed that we are going there, we are all getting ready to leave. My mom tells my dad that we need to stop at a Walgreens so I can buy my charger and what does he do? He doesnt stop. He doesn't care to stop. It was 8 something PM, Barnes and Noble closes at 10 PM. He couldn't stop to let me get a charger that would have taken 5 minutes at most? That was literally all I was asking for. I am in bummy clothes and all I want to do is go to my room, listen to music, and be alone. I didn't ask to travel the fucking globe to find a Barnes and Noble (he literally made at least 3 wrong turns trying to find this place), just to sit here for a couple of hours, with a dead phone, while everyone searches for a damn book. No. I asked to go to a Walgreens. We literally passed a Walgreens on the way here!! I asked him once again to stop, but did he? NO! The whole time since we've been in B&N, I've been with a pissy attitude and just to aggravate him I purposely went up to him to say "Oh, they don't seem to have a WALGREENS here" and to try to patch things up he replies "Why don't you see if they have chargers here?" That angered me even more because THAT'S NOT THE FUCKING POINT. THE POINT IS I WANTED TO BUY THE CHARGER AND GO HOME! He's just so inconsiderate, but then when he wants something done even when we(my mom, siblings, and I) have our own plans, he makes US wait until he finished whatever HE has/wants to do. I swear my parents call me all these things: selfish, inconsiderate, rude BUT THEY LITERALLY DO THINGS LIKE THIS ALL THE TIME! THEN THEY WONDER.

To be petty, like I always am, I decided to recommend "How to raise a daughter" book to my father because apparently he doesn't get it and needs to realize that he's just not doing something right.

Anyway, we finally left so then he decides that NOW he'll take me to get my charger. We drive to the Walgreens and GUESS WHAT??? IT'S FUCKING CLOSED!! WHO WOULD'VE THOUGHT. We then make our way to a Walmart, my mom comes with me inside. I search for a charger, picked one, and then looked for some pencils and sharpie pens for the sketch book my dad bought me at B&N (that's the only good thing that came from going there).

When we finally returned home, I began to draw in my sketch book. I have a picture from a picture booth thing and the theme on it is tree frogs! So I decided to draw a Tree Frog. I promise you I didn't trace, I just looked at it and draw it exactly how I saw. I'm so happy how it came out. My main goal is to learn how to draw faces, head, and perfect drawing a naked human body. I think naked skin is so gorgeous.

Well that's the second rant this week, So goodnight my loves.