Letters

Boys At War

"Willow please open up. I know you're in there." Steve called out to her from outside her door. Willow was crying quietly into her hands but had turned on the TV in case Steve could hear her. Willow wasn't much of a crier and she didn't like doing it in front of others.

Steve pressed his fingertips against the door and sighed. He had half a mind to kick it down, problem is he'd probably break his own leg in the process. He couldn't understand why Willow was so upset. She hadn't cried when Bucky broke the news that he was drafted. She had trembled a lot but put on a brave face. She hugged him for a really long time after that while Steve stood their awkwardly.

Steve sort of expected her to do the same with him but instead she had gotten angry and had run away from him crying. He tried getting a hold of Bucky but he was otherwise preoccupied and Steve didn't want to trouble him that night since he was shipping off the next morning. Steve was sure he could handle this.

He just wished that the Willows were reversed. Steve wished that Willow had cried and shut them out when Bucky got drafted but put on a brave face and hugged Steve for a really long time when he got drafted.

"Willow please." Steve begged, rapping his knuckles against the door again. "Talk to me! Why are you so upset?"

"You're going to war Steven!" Willow shouted at him through the door. Steve gulped, she had put the N at the end of his name, she meant business. "What do you want me to do? Throw confetti? Give you flowers!" Steve was clearly only making it worse.

"Can you open the door? I don't want to shout at you through it and upset the neighbors." Willow didn't reply and Steve cocked his head, straining to hear something other than the TV playing. The door was wrenched open from the other side and an angry, red rimmed eyed Willow stood there with her hands clenched into fists at her side.

Steve had stepped back as soon as he felt the door move and now he was standing in front of her slightly afraid that she might hit him or shove him, which he would have accepted because she would probably be crying and apologizing the next second.

Because they were the same height, Steve swore he could stare straight into her soul as he looked at her. She looked just as tortured on the inside as she felt on the outside.

Willow turned her back on him but left the door open. She angrily walked toward the couch where she turned off the TV and sat down. Steve sighed and followed her in, closing the door and removing his jacket as he went. Willow's apartment was small and a little dingy but the neighborhood was safe enough.

Willow's apartment itself was cozy and cute. A lot of the stuff in it had been in her childhood home, which Willow sold off when her mother left but she kept a lot of the furniture she had grown up with which gave Steve and Bucky this homey feeling especially since the three of them were the only home they had left.

Steve sat down on the couch next to her. She sniffled and crossed her arms but refused to look at him. "Willow, I'm sorry but."

"But nothing Steve, don't go." She commanded. Steve pursed his lips as she turned to glare at him.

"I want to go."

"I know you want to go and I'm telling you not to go. You'll die Steve. If training doesn't kill you, someone on the battlefield will. I can't worry about you and Bucky. I'd much rather just worry about Bucky."

"Why? Because you think he can get through training and go through war and come back in one piece?" Willow opened her mouth to reply but nothing came out. "You know that if Bucky comes back, he won't be the same right. How many times have you heard.."

"That war changes people. Which is why I can't let you go Steve. It's going to change you and you'll come back and nothing will be the same and I need you. I need you and Bucky." Willow pleaded. Just hearing her say that she needed Steve made his heart flutter.