Hear me Roar - English version

CHAPTER 31 - Say nothing...

               The Throne Room... I come here often to rest, far from the hubbub of the capital. I spend hours staring at the Iron Throne, as if it would eventually say something to me. As if it would finally apologize for all the harm it has done.

               As I approach the hall, two voices reach my ears. I recognize them immediately: Baelish and Varys, the two masterminds behind our misfortunes as well as our joys. I stay behind the door, confident that I will come out more informed from this espionage session.

"There were never a thousand blades," Littlefinger says. "Barely two hundred, I know it. I counted them."

"Ah...! That does not surprise me coming from you," Varys replies. "What an ugly old thing."

"It has a certain appeal, however."

"The kind of appeal Lysa Arryn has. What a pity you had to settle for your second choice."

"It is too early to judge, my friend."

               I haven't seen my aunt for a very long time, but they say she has gone half-mad and still breastfeeds her son, Robin, who is now eight years old. Strange characters, if you ask me. Baelish won't feel out of place.

"It is flattering," Petyr resumes. "Truly. That you should feel such terror at the thought of me getting what I want."

"Thwarting your plans has never been one of my great ambitions, I promise you. Regardless, who doesn't like to see their friends fail now and then?"

"You are a hundred times right. For example... when I thwarted the plan you had to give Sansa Stark to the Tyrells. I must confess, in all honesty, that I undoubtedly felt a certain gratification in doing so."

               I should have known! Always nosing around where he shouldn't. Once again, Petyr proves to me that I cannot trust him. However, I do not yet understand what place Sansa and Tyrion's marriage has in his plans. Perhaps he only did it to vex Varys.

"But your confidante," he continues. "The one who provided you with the information regarding my plans. The one you swore to protect. You brought no gratification to her. And she brought no gratification to me either. A very bad investment on my part, that one."

               I know, from Varys, that he is speaking of Ros. She who had made this entire journey to the capital to have a new life. She found herself embroiled in these plots despite herself.

"Fortunately," Baelish says, "I have a friend who wanted to try something new, something bold. This friend was so grateful to me for letting him try this... refreshing experience."

               I dig my nails into my own flesh to keep myself from reacting. I do not know what happened to Ros, but I know without a doubt that this "friend" is Joffrey. Once again, I shouldn't have lowered my guard.

"I did what I did for the good of the realm," Varys answers him, on the defensive.

"The realm... Do you even know what it is? The realm is like the thousand blades of Aegon's enemies: a story we agree to tell each other over and over, until we forget that it's a lie."

"But what would be left if, by chance, we abandoned the lie? Chaos. A gaping precipice waiting to swallow us."

"Chaos isn't a pit. Chaos is a ladder. Many who try to climb it fail and never get to try again. The fall breaks them. And some are given a chance to climb, but they refuse. They cling to the realm, or the gods, or love. Illusions, all of it. The ladder alone exists. The climb is the only reality."