Hear me Roar - English version

CHAPTER 21 - She fled

               After what happened to Sansa, I had made the decision to change my behaviour and protect my own. However, when Ros was in danger, I did not help her. What happened to me last night woke me up. What was supposed to remove me from the chessboard once and for all has restarted the game.

               Sitting at the small table in my room before the balcony, I pour two cups of tea, awaiting my guest. I find myself alone with my thoughts. Although the events of yesterday cling to me, it is my relationship with Joffrey that preoccupies me. It was never simple, and despite our frequent arguments, I felt we were beginning to understand each other. I find myself quite disappointed.

               Arrow begins to bark, rousing me from my stupor. Varys enters the room and, bowing, greets me.

"Sit," I invite him. "I've poured the tea. I believe I know you particularly enjoy jasmine."

"You are well-informed, your Majesty."

               The man settles in and lightly dips his lips into the scalding liquid.

"I imagine you know why you are here."

"And I am sorry for it," he replies. "You are more damaged than I was told."

               I could pretend to have forgotten these two wounds, or act as if my lip weren't throbbing violently, but that would be a lie.

"What has my husband done today?" I ask.

"The King held audience in the Throne Room all morning."

"It is two o'clock," I object. "What did he do next?"

"A dispute broke out between the King and the Hand, it seems."

               That's one good thing done.

"Today, I need you to bring me something other than secrets, Lord Varys."

"I am listening, Your Majesty."

"I need moon tea."

"Your Majesty... permit me to warn you. A child would ensure your safety. The King could no longer..."

"I have no doubt the King and I will eventually have a child. I know my duty. But not like this."

"This child could ensure you the love of the people and of Joffrey."

               Disheartened, I finish my tea in one gulp, burning my throat in the process. Joffrey claimed to love me for months, and that did not stop him from hurting me. I see no reason why I would want his love anymore.

"It is an order, Lord Varys."

♐︎

               After my assault, Sansa spent several nights with me, for I did not want to be alone. It had been a long time since we had last talked. And, lying side by side, we felt as though we were back home.

               That is the feeling my room gives me. When I see my bow and my sword resting on the table, I feel at home. I remember my first archery practices with Jory, as well as the first blade my father gave me: a dagger that never leaves my side.

               Despite my injuries, I do not hide. On the contrary, I want everyone to know. I even visited Ros the very next day. I wanted her to know she wasn't alone, and to apologize for not helping her. She does not resent me. On the contrary, she is much more worried about me and my health.

               Also, I have decided to draw closer to the people. This week, Sansa and I visited an orphanage. In a city like King's Landing, the people are poor and many of these children do not have enough to eat properly every day. That is why we brought them provisions from the palace as well as many toys that the royal children no longer need.