Stepping out of my bedroom and in to the living area of my apartment I run my fingers through my hair and survey the damage that surrounds me.
My apartment looks as though I have been burgled ten times over but I know without doubt that I haven't, instead the destruction I see was caused by 'the wrath of Hailey'.
A red smear down one of my walls reminds,me of of the glass of wine that Hailey flung at my head as I spoke words that caused her fury to ignite and her heart to break.
Plates lie smashed on my wooden floor and the cushions from my sofa lie scattered where they fell as she flung them at me whilst screaming all of my flaws in my face.
I lift my fingers to my swollen bottom lip. The slap she had given me as a parting gift could have been given by a professional boxer and it would have hurt less.
I know I should begin the clean up but every part of me aches and all I want to do is sit on my sofa and hide away from the mess I have made.
Sitting down on my Grey and black plaid sofa, I groan as I realise how heavy my arms feel, I must have strained every muscle just try to contain Hailey yesterday and prevent her from doing me some serious damage.
I hadn't gone in to the conversation meaning to end things with her but what had started as a confessional quickly spiraled once she realised the depths of my deception. I hadn't just spoken to Taylor behind her back and I hadn't just met with Taylor what I promised that I wouldn't, I had fallen for Taylor and that confession had proven almost too much for Hailey to bare.
Resting my elbows on my knees and my head on my hands my ears burned with all the screaming I had endured the day before.
First it was Hailey and then came Alessia, her fury over my treatment of Taylor had left scars I was yet to face.
Looking to the black, wrought iron and glass coffee table before me my tired eyes fall on one more piece of evidence of the damage I had done. A letter from the school 'inviting' me for a disciplinary hearing for bringing the school into disrepute with my antics in New York the principals way of punishing me for leaving with Taylor no doubt.
Just as I'm about to curl up on my sofa and hibernate for the rest of my life I hear my phone begin to ring and I snatch it up, a tiny part of me still hopeful that Taylor will find a way to forgive me.
Mum...
"Hi mum"
"Hi baby" the sound of her voice causes tears to sting my eyes "How are you feeling today?"
"Like I have been hit by a freight train and then had my broken body dipped into a vat of steaming hot shit"
"There he is" she speaks quietly and I can almost hear her smiling
"There who is?"
"My spunky baby, my strong, beautiful boy that won't let anyone or any thing beat him"
"Mum..."
"Don't tell me that isn't who you are right now, it's who you have always been and your dad and I have always been so proud of you for it"
Tears now fill my eyes and threaten to over power me. It's not that I'm afraid to cry in front of my mum but I'm afraid that if I start now I will never stop
"I dont know how to fix this" my voice sounds like it did when I was a child, small, high pitched, afraid, waiting for my mum to take the pain away and make everything better
"Trav, you have to work out which parts you really want to fix, for you though, no one else. What is it you really, really want for your life?"
"I want Taylor"
Okay, well forget about everything else and I know that's going to be hard for you because you always want to fix everything for everyone but this time it's got to be about you honey. Forget about Hailey and the disciplinary and just focus on the one thing that will make you happy"
"She hates me mum. She's blocked me on absolutely everything. There's no way for me to contact her"
"There's always one way"
I ask her what she means
"Get back on a plane, go to her and apologize and don't stop apologizing until she believes it"
30 Minutes Later
The sound of the phone ringing in my ear does nothing to quash my fears. The last time Alessia and I spoke she had been brutal with the truth and her harsh words still rattled around in my ears. I hope she realises how much this situation is eating me up and decides to help me
"Kelce, you came back for more... Very brave of you"
"Alessia, tell me something, if a guy moved from one country to another just to show you how sorry he was would that be romantic or would that be creepy?"
"Well that depends, is the guy you?"
"Maybe"
"Is the country America?"
"Maybe"
"Little Kelce just grew some fuckin balls... About time too. What do you need me to do?"
"I need you to get me an in with Taylor"
"Mission accepted"
