FANGIRLS! (ON HOLD)

Calling in a Favor

Chapter 18- Calling in a Favor

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Allison's POV

Usually when one of my companions would die, I would return them to their family. I would then mourn with the family and quickly leave, but I would always keep an eye on them. It was a practice that I did only three times: the first time for Kasey, who was my companion during my first two regenerations; the second time for Jayden and Isobel, they both kept me company when I was the fifth Guardian; and the last time for Gavin, who needs no explanation. They were the only four who died while traveling with me in my previous regenerations, and I made a silent vow that I wouldn't let another companion die because of me. I guess I broke that rule.

Since I didn't know who Lily's parents were in this universe, I improvised. I floated her into a newborn star. This action was based on two reasons. One- we were both not from this universe, and if I just buried her on Earth I feared that someone would find some of her real-universe-DNA and freak out. And 2- I knew that she would want a burial, or cremating, that would be awesome and original. What's more original than cremation by a star? Nothing, well, that I can think of right now.

I closed the TARDIS doors when it was done. For some reason, my beautiful TARDIS was now stuck as an out-of-service red police phone box; that only pissed me off even more. I would rather have it stuck as a tree or something, because now it just looks like I'm trying to be like the Doctor. I guess I should care about if the Doctor sees a floating red police box in space, but right now I didn't care, I felt numb.

I didn't care if I ran into the Doctor at all. I knew him back on Gallifrey, he was one of my best friends in the Academy. I ran away because he did. And also because whenever he was on Gallifrey, he would tell me of his journeys and always I wanted to have my own adventures instead of just listening to his. We kept in touch over the years, but then the Time War started. I returned to Gallifrey to fight, and eventually so did the Doctor but he didn't recognize me during the war.

Perhaps if I ran into him, we could pick up where we left off. Maybe we could travel together. I knew that that thought was a long shot, but it gave me a little hope. Though that hope was quickly diminished by the thought that he probably didn't want anything to do with me. I mean, I had run from him multiple times.

I don't care if I run into him, or if he learns about me. I don't care about anything anymore. Whatever happens, happens.

I sighed loudly as I walked over to the console and slowly started pressing buttons. My trench coat hung lazily on the coat hanger next to the door. Maybe I should just get rid of that thing. It was once something that was my trademark, but now whenever I looked at it, it just reminded me that I caused yet another person's death.

My TARDIS hummed quietly, in an attempt to cheer me up. It didn't work.

Something dug into my skin around my hip. I pulled up my white dress-up shirt and camisole to see the pack of 'Panda' Pockys was still in the same place I put it when I first got it. I lifted the package of sweets out of its designated pocket, I guess I must have forgotten that it was there. I threw it down a hall. I didn't want any reminders of my friend who I couldn't save.

I didn't know what to do now. Normally, my companion would want to go see some random planet and I would be more than happy to take them there and run from my problems. But now I couldn't run anymore.

I sank down into my jump seat, watching the purple electricity crackle in the cylindrical glass tube in the middle of the console. What was that thing called anyway? Oh, yeah, the Time Rotor. At least my Timelord brain still worked.

I just sat there in silence, wallowing in self-pity. I think I'm entitled to it once in a while, I mean, my best friend is now dead because of me. She shouldn't have even been outside of the TARDIS. I should have been awake and stopped her.