chapter 36

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Chasing a Memory

That night you lay awake, back melded in with the mattress as your senses all but dialed into the hefty snoring of Arthur and the gentle ambient creaking of the cabin's structure

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That night you lay awake, back melded in with the mattress as your senses all but dialed into the hefty snoring of Arthur and the gentle ambient creaking of the cabin's structure.

Every time you did manage to shut your eyes briefly, the same mental images came creeping through... those early years of your childhood, your mother's gentle smile and how it was all accompanied by a great longing to see her again that you were finding incredibly hard to suppress.

You huffed softly, turning onto your side slowly and with great effort (due to the ever growing baby in your seemingly massive belly) and gazed at the shadowy figure of Arthur's back to you in bed. With sleepy eyes you traced the slow rise and fall of his chest as he breathed steadily, going over his words today. He had seemed rather cautious about you potentially going and chasing this lead on your mother. You understood he wanted to protect you, but your mind seemed to hyper-fixate on the aspect of that reluctance - thinking how long it might take to even persuade him to come with you, if that was what he insisted on.

Funny how hours of lost sleep and a monotonous carousel of memories was all it took to convince you that you did need to seek out contact with your mother. You craved it like nothing else, especially now you were due to become a mother yourself soon. Part of you felt it would be so perfect to finally have that maternal companionship you had been starved of for so very long, to be able to reflect such a love onto your own child with more vigor if the hole in your heart was somewhat patched up at last.

-

Applewood Creek was more than alive by the time you eventually stirred in the late morning. The cabin around you was quiet, with lingering signs of life that morning from the used coffee cup on the table and crumbs littering the kitchen side. Sighing, you heaved yourself up onto your side to start with and rubbed the sleep from your eyes. Your body had felt so fatigued, besides the lack of sleep it was probably exacerbated by the rushing of activity in your mind all night.

Your painfully swollen feet slid into your slippers and with your equally as aching back, you made your way from the bed wrapped in your robe and padded to the window by the kitchen area, to glance out at another miraculous day.

The sky was clear, and across the ranch you spotted a group of young colt's bucking and galloping alongside each other like fools, whilst the worker's busied around with their usual duties - carting hay and muck about the farm and leading stroppy mare's out to paddock.

On closer inspection, there was no sign of Arthur. You imagined he would be further out in the wild flower fields today, accompanying Peter at the far end of the ranch with the young foals and mares.

Maybe it was the hormones that ramped up your spontaneity and impatience, but with your newly found information regarding your mother - your heart didn't want to seem to wait a moment longer to pursue the lead. You had done all your years of waiting, the least you could do for yourself was go out and see what could be instore for you.

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