LOST IN LOVE 🌡️

19/UNDERSTAND

ADRIK a.k.a LUSCIOUS

I had no idea I would tell Etoria about my past , a part of me I had buried but I was vulnerable again and I don't know if that was a good thing or bad thing

I said all my heart out and she walked past me but I would never give up , she just needs some time to digest the information I told her at once , I didn't want to pressure her so I never chased after her and I can't seem to get this scene out of my head

It's been a week now since I told Etoria about my mamma but at the end of the day , even at the point of asking her forgiveness I still lied and never disclosed my name.

I omitted how my mamma would always call me 'Adrik , my boy' ,I never told her how bloodied my hands were as I hunted all those who laid their hands on my mamma and killed them mercilessly.

It was justice , I never told her how I ventured and started talking lives of innocent people who are just victims of hate, envy, greed and just for the fun of it . I just hope the day I tell her , she will be able to forgive me then.

I picked myself up and got ready to head to the gym but then I heard a knock and opening the door am met with my light

Etoria, I seem to freeze as she lightly pushed me out of the way and walked in so I pulled myself together and closed the door but I heard her mutter

" Open"

she said it so softly but it rang in my ears like a scald and quickly I opened the door ,

she must not be comfortable being with me in an enclosed space , I have become a monster she had to look out for a sprint from .

"Sit"

She said patting the space on the bed beside her so I did as told

I settled down beside her and then we locked eyes , it was intense that I wished I didn't look her in the eye so I wouldn't have had to see the pain and uncertainty her eyes directed towards me

" Luscious are you listening?".

She asked bringing me back from my head so I nodded a yes

" You hurt me Luscious, what you did was wrong and I could have sworn that I didn't know who you were in that moment".

"You never heard me , Luscious I called you, I begged you , I begged you in his name as God and Allah but you never heard me , you let your demons consume you , you taunted me in my anguish and I would never have thought I would get to see a monster that day ".

"I was reminded of the shell I once left behind but that day you pushed me back into the shell , Luscious you took me backwards and you would never be excused but you can be understood like I want you to understand me and what your mother was conveying to you"

She said seriously so I gave her a reassuring nod so she knows am listening to her

" Luscious I am an orphan, I lost my parents in a car accident when I was 7 year old".

" It was my birthday and my parents asked what I wanted so I said I wanted to go to 'Sweet sensin' restaurant ".

"We were on the highway and I remember hearing my mother talk about about what they were gonna do so I asked her what she meant and I saw tears in her eyes".

" She held my hand and told me to close my eyes and count to 50 , I started counting and slowly I felt someone lift me up then I felt the pain all over my body as I had just been thrown out the moving car but the moment I opened my eyes I watched our moving car explode ".

"I can't accurately remember what they looked like anymore but I didn't and will never forget them but I lost them physically and most of our memories together but you didn't and won't".

"Your memories may be filled with sadness but you got to hear the most precious words on this earth ,I didn't".

" I woke up in a hospital and looking back now I realize and understand what the doctor meant when he said my Uterus was damaged , I can't have children Luscious it's 99 percent impossible, from the age of seven I lost my parents , then my right to have kids in a future I was still far from , I had it all crushed".

"I moved into my paternal uncle's home as he was the kin to be my guardian signed by my father".

"He had a family of 3 including his wife , his daughter and himself and he treated me very well and I was living but not good but not for long".

"Everything changed and the little I held unto was snatched and stolen from me too . It all started on my 12th birthday".

" I had stopped celebrating my birthdays since the accident as I blamed myself for my parents death but every year my uncle would always get a small cake with candles on top and he would leave it in my room at exactly 12am and would always tell me to make a wish and blow out the candles then he always leaves but this night he didn't".

"He dropped the cake and I turned away from him but he didn't say anything so I just guessed he was getting tired of wishing me a happy birthday though it only does so much ".

"I would have never expected him to remove the comforter off of my body and when I turned to face him , he had his arms wide open with a huge smile on his face and when I didn't react he pulled me to himself and hugged me so I leaned on him thinking he just wanted to comfort me ".

"He then stood up wrapped my legs around his torso and whispered in my hair ' it's time ' and then he dropped me on the bed so suddenly with my legs spread open so I quickly closed them only to see that he had left" .

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