Feelings (A Cameron Dallas & Shawn Mendes Fanfiction)

Sinners

- Shawn's POV-
I wake up in the morning and think about last night, I run to the bathroom and throw up. I can't believe I did that, we had sex I slept with a boy and I loved it every second. But I shouldn't have, I'm scared I don't know what to think. Cameron comes in the bathroom "Shawn are ok" he says concerned, he sets his hand on my back and I flinch away from him. "Shawn?" He asks again "we're going to hell" I whisper so quietly I could barely hear. "What" he ask "I can't do this" I say in a normal tone. I get up and walk out of the bathroom "do what" cam ask following me "this" I say loudly "just give me a little space" I say as I leave the room.
- Cam's POV-
I don't understand what's going on. Last night was amazing literally the best night of my life, and I thought it was his too. But now I don't know. He said he needed space so I'll give him awhile. It's now Sunday and we have another MAGCON, so I decide I'll go help them set up. I walk out of our room and into the hallway, I didn't want to take the elevator so I walked the long way to the steps. Before I get to the door to the stairs someone yells my name, I turn around and see Nash "what's up" I say jogging to him when I reach him he finally says "I don't know, but last night Shawn's duck was UP your ass" he says laughing hysterically I blush deep red and push him back. "How do you know about that?" I ask he grabs my arm pulling me into the Jack's room "we all heard what you two did last night" he says and all the guys were in there "yeah we did" they yelled and laughed "UGHHHH SHAWN!" Nash moans everyone laughs except me "CAM HARDER" jack moans loudly everyone laughs except me again. Annoyed I turn towards the door to walk out but Nash grabs my arm "let me go jerk" I say he looks hurt "Cam I'm sorry we were just joking it went to far, we're all really happy for you and Shawn" he says "but it was really really loud" he says smiling "and long you guys were non stop for 2 hours" Matt says I smile "it's just that our dick game is too strong, and yours are weak you guys last like 20 minutes while me and Shawn last hours" I say we all laugh "where is Shawn?" Carter asks it's weird me and him haven't spoken much after me and Shawn's little "I don't know" I said sighing "I was gonna go help set up for the show tonight anyone want to help?" I say "I will" Nash says and we walk down to help.
- Shawn's POV-
I leave the hotel without any of the guys seeing me surprisingly and walk down the pathway leading to the beach. I pull my hood over my head to make sure no one sees me, I love my fans but I don't feel like being bothered right now. I lay in the sand looking up at the sky "do you hate me" I ask God I get no reply I stay put not moving just thinking about what my moms said maybe she's right slow tears fall down my face, and just then it starts to rain and that's when I know what I'm doing is wrong. I don't get up I lay there letting the rain soak me as I cry softly
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It's now time for the show I left the beach like an hour ago and went to Taylor's room to shower I didn't want to bump into Cam. Luckily my clothes were still in here. We're now back stage waiting for the show to start and cam is walking towards me, crap. "Hey babe" leaning in to kiss me, but I turn so he kisses my cheek he looks at me confused "what's wrong?" He asks "nothing" I say "don't say that I know something's wrong" I don't say anything I just look away "Shawn" he says I don't budge "Shawn!" He yells I turn towards him tears threatening to fall, he grabs my hand and pulls me to a empty green room "Shawn talk to me" he says softly "I just can't do this I can't be with you, my mom was right this is a sin I don't want to go to hell, I don't want God to hate me!" I cry out loudly
- Cam's POV-
I don't know where this is coming from we were fine lasts night what's changed? "Shawn what are you talking about" I ask confused I pull him into my arms as he cries into my chest but it only last about 30 seconds until he's pushing me away harshly I stumble backwards tripping over a leg of the chair and falling on the ground. "Shawn what the hell!" I say loudly not yelling but showing I'm angry "I don't want you to hold me, I don't want to be your boyfriend, I don't want to go to hell and I don't want to be gay!" He yells crying and sobbing I look at him with a shocked expression "what do you mean you don't want to be gay you can't choose!" I yell back "well I am choosing, and I've chose not to be gay" he says back and with that he walks out the door I sit on the couch and cry is he right are we going to hell for being gay? It's not our fault we didn't choose we just are he can't hate us.
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It's towards the end of the show and Shawn is singing stitches as the final show he finishes the song and the crowd cheers "Thanks again Chicago you guys were awesome but this is the en---" I cut off Taylor "wait! One last thing!" I say and the crowd cheers "I have something to say" I start and sigh "I hope what I'm about to say changes nothing I hope my fans still support and love me like I love you guys, I love you guys so much your the reason I'm here without you I would just be some guy making vines that no one cared about" the all cheer and I hear some I love you Cam's and your the best from the crowd. "Ok guys..... I'm- I'm bisexual and I'm in love with a very special guy, someone that is funny nice and caring" I say I look at the crowd to see their reaction it's silent and then they cheer I hear some people say rude things but who gives a fuck "and the person I am completely madly I love with is... Shawn Mendes" I say "and I don't care what anyone has to say, I'm in love with a boy. I don't care if it is a sin I can't help who I love or what gender I like, and if God hates me for liking the same gender. Oh well, that's his problem Love knows no gender or race or religion. Love is love" I say proudly and confidently and I turn around to look at Shawn while he's looking at me with teary eyes "and Shawn I love you, I love you more then life itself I love you so much it hurts" I say and open my arms I smile at him and he runs full speed to me and jumps into my arms and wraps his legs around my waist I look him in the eye and attach our lips in a slow passionate kiss no tongue though didn't want to do to much in front of the crowd. I pull away "I love you" I say into his ear "I love you too, and I'm sorry I do want to be your boyfriend and so what if I'm gay I was just scared love is love like you said" he says smiling I nod and smile we wave to the crowd and walk off stage. "I want to be with you forever" Shawn says to me I set him down and get on one knee and pull out the little box in my pocket. "It's not an engagement ring, it's a promise ring I promise to love and be there for you for ever I promise to stay faithful I promise to be your best friend and your lover someone you can talk about anything someone you can trust" I say "do you accept and promise the same?" I ask he's quiet for a second "I do" he says and I slip the ring on his finger