•Unwritten•

Fifty Eight

I leant over the bathroom sink, staring into my sunken features in the mirror. My eyes were dull and surrounded by bloodshot arrows, and my skin was pale. I looked like that of a twilight vampire, except my skin didn't glisten, it just burned. Every inch of me felt like it was burning, my skin, my mind, my heart. It was burning with grief, with loss, with a lack of understanding.

My hair was lifeless, even after washing it, it just looked dull. I opened the bathroom drawer and pulled out a pair of scissors, staring at them until my hand finally stopped shaking. Then I brought them up to my hair and began chopping , not too short- I wasn't losing my mind- I just needed something to change. Once it was all even, just below my shoulders I stopped and rested the scissors down on the sink. This morning, Sam, Dean and I had given my father a hunters funeral, like he deserved.

My father's truth, his story, had left me with more questions than it had asked, gaping holes and missing information that I neither yearned for or denied. It frightened me to think about, my world started to seem like it was untrue, everything felt like a lie. The angel, I didn't know if its name and I didn't want to involve Castiel purely based on the fact that I was no longer sure he could be trusted. I couldn't trust any of the angels, not anymore, not after what they had taken from me. My fathers story concluded that despite Azazel being the one to put down the hammer, the angel that had made the deal, had sown the seeds for my mothers death, and then he killed my father. I didn't get the chance to know either of them, only brief glimpses of them and now I'd never get that chance again because they were gone, my entire family was dead. The only family I had left now were Sam and Dean and despite their efforts to be here for me, I worried that I may soon lose them too. Sam was slipping, he was turning into something else, something the demon blood was making him. And Dean, I started to doubt that he would forgive my lies, especially now that I couldn't clear them up myself. Sam had taken that opportunity away from me. It was only a matter of time though, Sam would mess up and Dean would find out and then my worst fear may come true. I'd lose them both.

There was a light tap on the door and I hummed as it opened slightly and Dean stepped inside. He was holding a glass of water and a bottle of pills as he closed the door with his foot and walked towards me. His hand instantly reached up to cup my cheek and then his brows knitted in confusion as he noticed my hair, and the piles of chopped off strands around my feet.

"I like it." He smiled lazily before placing a kiss on my forehead. "How are you feeling?" He asked as he handed me the water and popped out two of the Tylenol for me. I smiled gratefully as I took them and swallowed them back, hoping they'd start to ease my headache that had been growing all day.

"Unsure." I sighed, leaning back against the sink.

"Of what?"

"Everything." I looked up to him sadly. "I don't know what I am, not really. I'm a product of some angelic deal."

His eyes narrowed and he shook his head. "No you're not."

I raised an eyebrow at him.

"Okay, obviously you are. But that doesn't change anything."

I raised the other eyebrow. "It changes everything. I might not even be completely human Dean. My whole life has been a lie."

He shook his head. "No it hasn't." He placed his hands on either side of my face, forcing me to look at him, deep into his emerald eyes that searched mine for some glint of hope. "Your father lied to you, for a long time. You don't know where you really came from, what that angel wanted to hide with you. But you are human, you bleed just like me, you feel just like I do. You love and you laugh and you care. You are human Faith, it doesn't matter what some angel says." I could see his eyes starting to glass up. "And not everything is a lie, I'm not. Sam's not. Our family isn't."