Snow Angel

❄️》13 - Flower Crown《❄️

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(2,711 Words)
Briar Rose's POV

I'm sitting on the back porch. It's earlier than I usually wake up. I had a nightmare, but I didn't wake up screaming or crying so I chose to just sit on the back porch instead. I stare at the trees just thinking. It's been a couple of days since Sejanus died and Cassie isn't even close to being the same. She is acting like everything is fine, and I'm pretty sure everyone believes her, but I can see right through her. When you are different like me you have to learn how to read everything off of someone. You learn how to notice everything around you about everyone around yourself. Like Cassie used to have this softness to her voice that just made you calm. But now it's sad her tone is different, it's sad, but most people can't tell. It's only a slight difference, but I can tell. She still helps with everything, but she has been eating less. Although we don't have much to eat she hasn't really been eating that stuff. She also lies to Lucy Gray and Barb Azure about eating later. That's also a lie. I've been worried about her so I stay up until she goes to bed. She doesn't really eat. She also sleeps way more too. She is acting like me when I get so overwhelmed that I can't do anything but lay in bed and read.

I really miss old Cassie. The one who always understood and the one who has one of the most comforting hugs, but since Sejanus...it's just different. I know death can make people different, I've read books where characters have died, but seeing how someone reacts in real life is just different. Books are different, they're easier to understand than people.

I might as well take Cassie somewhere. I could probably take her to the rock and take the guitar or my spot that I have in the woods that no one knows about. I know that she doesn't want to cry around me. She is trying to stay strong. Just like Lucy Gray has been after the Games. People just think they are good at hiding their emotions, but there are always things that people do that they don't know that they do when they are sad.

I rub my hands together trying to get the energy out. The anxious energy that I have. I hug my knees close to my chest and I look out off the back porch. Sometimes I wish people would understand that I understand way more than they think I do. I know I am 11, but I understand things that Lucy Gray doesn't even understand sometimes. I mean she tries to shield me from things, but that doesn't happen. I have seen and heard things I shouldn't have seen.

I walk inside and I see Lucy Gray sitting on a chair and I go up behind her and give her a hug. I can feel her tense up and then she looks back and smiles at me. "Was wonderin' if I could take the guitar today. Want to do some practicin'." I say to Lucy Gray and she turns completely around and looks at me.

"Want me to come?" Lucy Gray asks me and i shake my head no

"Gonna take Cassie." I say to Lucy Gray and she frowns a bit.

"You need to leave her alone. She is going through a lot." Lucy Gray says and I roll my eyes a bit.

"I'm not leavin' her alone." I say to Lucy Gray with a frown on my face.

"Fine, you can take the guitar, but be back by supper, and take lunch." Lucy Gray says and I nod smiling and I hug her again.

"Thanks, Lu!" I say tapping my fingertips against each other excitedly

"I'll pack you two lunch." Lucy Gray says and I nod climbing up the ladder to the loft and I look at Cassie her eyes are puffy from crying. She cries herself to sleep. I pretend to be asleep, but I hear her every night.

I go to Lucy Gray's pile of clothes and I look through it trying to find something to find for Cassie to wear. I should probably find something for myself to wear. I find a white blouse and a long blue skirt that has flowers all over it and I smile. Lucy Gray said mama used to wear this. She told me this memory that she has of her and mama playing in a meadow her skirt was flowing out and she said everything felt good. I wish I could've met mama. Lucy Gray said I would love her so much. I quickly put on a button down dress that has stripes and pockets on the skirt. I look over at Cassie and I sigh a bit. If I could take away all her hurt I would. I know how badly stuff like this feels. It feels awful, like nothing will ever feel better again. That's what it has felt like ever since what happened with Andrew. Nothing feels ok, but I try my best to make everything feel ok.