Well today was interesting It started off really badly. I came into our activity room and that was all fine. I was worried, yeah, but alright. We started talking in our group about what we were doing today, and then there was the inevitable moment when we had to say who the leaders were. So I put my hand up, and so did Tahnee. So of course one of the “popular” kids, who was sitting next to Tahnee started laughing and made some sort of comment about her and I. She told him to shut up but not in a mean way. So there was the start. And the comments continued throughout the day. I was on the verge of tears almost all day. I was so close to it but I kept it in. We started leading about an hour later. Bike riding for the first time. So we led off and for almost the whole trip I was stuck in the front, leading everywhere while Tahnee sat at the back comfortably, talking to her friends. And then there was the comment from the same guy that laughed earlier, and he said “You two don’t make a very good pair,” knowing everything about the whole situation. It almost set me off. I don’t think it’s going to get any better. I’m not sure but it doesn’t feel like it. So I ignored it. Over and over again. We made it back to our campus. We had a few little conversations but it was all really awkward, and all about where we had to go and all of that stuff. I don’t know, I tried to make an effort to talk to her but I don’t think she really cares. I can’t stop looking at her though, but earlier tonight I didn’t look at her at all, for almost the whole night, except for a tiny accidental glance, just in her general direction without even knowing where she was, and of course she happened to look at the same time. At the rate I’m going she’ll hate me by the end of the five weeks. There was a point about half an hour ago where I walked into the room she was in, as well as a couple of her friends, including Jane. So her and Jane just sort of stood there staring at me and starting to laugh. So I backed out slowly. I found my book, picked it up, chose a pencil to use and came back downstairs to my standard writing room and Tahnee and another friend were standing in the doorway. I said excuse me and her friend apologized and moved out of the way, and then asked what was going on. I don’t know if that was connected or not but it seemed like it was. So I pushed past and Tahnee said sorry. Probably not for anything but being in the way, but it’s a start I guess. And I’ve had a good day apart from that, so I think things will start to get better form now on. All I can say is, thank god I seem to be able to actually make some proper friends at this godforsaken place.
-Anonymous
