BRIDE WITH BENEFITS | JJK

10

As you and Jungkook sit beside each other on the beach, he thinks about his present more than his past. Finds himself lost in the sight of you smiling.

He couldn't think after he lost Soo Ji that he would ever feel his heart warm up again.

It's just not you who feels the way you feel towards him. He feels the same things for you.

Everytime he is with you, he doesn't really thinks about the past, he just exists. Exists in the present.

He just wishes to live in this moment forever where his mind isn't haunting him with those dreadful memories. Instead he ends up making new ones.

As annoying as you two are to each other, you do enjoy the chaos you both create together. It ended up bringing you closer to him at the end of the day so you don't really mind it.

What he can't help is how he can't express what he feels. He doesn't wants to express it all. He feels like his feelings are safe until they're in his heart, protected. As soon as they escape everything will start to fall apart.

His past experience, the tragic end of his first love keeps him from loving too openly, staying distant.

That's what keeps him just appreciating you from afar.

He didn't expect anyone to understand that even after three years he's still coming to terms with the loss of his love.

He never told his family or his friends because when he was with Soo Ji he just never thought about anything or anyone else. It was just him and her inside his heart and head.

He wants to say you're beautiful, he wants to say you're the kindest, he wants to say that you should ask him for more, he wants to say that he cares for you far more than he shows, he wants to say that he hurts everytime he hurts you, he wants to say that he is falling in love with you. But he keeps it all inside safely inside his heart.

He knows that you think he fooled you into thinking he liked you and wooed you with false pretenses but he wants to tell you that it all just came so naturally to him without having to put in too much effort. He ended up liking you for real despite his plans of avoiding that. He is drowned too deep into it to just let you go so easily.

If you leave him or he has to leave you, he'll fall apart again. And he might never get back together. It took everything in him to do it once, he can't even imagine doing it all over again.

It was a dark place he was in for quite a long time. It took a lot in him to get out of that.

He allows himself some leeway and takes the risk. He pulls you closer with his hands on your waist. He tucks your hair behind your ear before he leans towards you.

You're taken aback for a moment but then you make the final lean in and close the gap between you two.

You don't care if people are watching. You don't care if it's getting inappropriate for a public place but all you care about is that he's kissing you.

Sunset was two hours ago. You and him, ate dinner together with the view of the red tinted sky. It was early but that was the only time slot where there was an open booking. You even drank rosè wine for the first time with him.

And now you two were kissing on the beach. Well not anymore, you are walking back to your room.

You are back in his embrace as soon as you have removed your shoes and  stand in the dimly lit room.

"You don't have to be so scared Jungkook," you tell him.

"I don't know. I just feel like I bring bad luck upon anyone I get too close with and you're a good person, I don't want to ruin your life," he says.

"I'll be honest it did hurt me a lot when you said you didn't really have feelings for me. And I'll ask you this for the last time, if you still think this is too much for you, we can just get divorced. You don't have to pretend to be okay for my sake," you hold his hand as you speak. You look down not in his eyes.

He lifts your chin to make your gaze meet his, "It's not just for you but I also wanna do it for myself. It feels different with you, you're special. And I'm really really sorry for making it seem like I fooled you, I swear I really like you and that's why I wanted to marry only you," he says caressing your cheeks.

"Jungkook I always had pure intentions of making things work between us, but if you don't open up or if you don't let me try then it won't happen right?" You say looking up at him. He's so big and tall, it really feels safe to be in his arms.

"A marriage won't work if only one person tries and I know that. I promise I'll try my best, okay?" He asks.

You nod with a smile, the tip of your chin pressed to his chest.

He leans down to kiss you, you tiptoe to reach him more easily. His hand on the small of your back reaches your hips and he pulls you even more closer.

The kiss gets heated, turns passionate very soon and you try to get him to the bed but he pauses then pulls himself away.

"Okay look I don't have condoms so we can't take this far right now. And I know it's low risk but I don't wanna take any. I don't think we're at a place right now where we should be bringing in a kid, we have got to focus on ourselves first," he says.

You totally agree with him, and you both get ready to sleep.

When you pretend to be asleep while thinking about all that happened since the morning, you feel a finger poking you on your shoulder.

"You know going down on each other won't hurt anyone," he suggests with a playful smile on his face.

You quickly turn around towards him and pull him into a kiss. He goes down kissing you, impatient to watch you come like you did the previous night, losing control of yourself and moaning his name in the sexiest way.

And as soon as he presses a kiss on your cunt, you start to lose all control over yourself once again.

Author's note
If the updates are unpredictable after this I'm really sorry in advance.
I'm going through bad mental health days.
The tragedy of my life is that my family doesn't really understands me and I have zero real friends who actually care about me...

Well anyways I don't mean to yap about myself here

Hope you all are enjoying how the story is progressing :)